Got this through an e-mail forward. Having lived in DR for so long, I have to say these are right on !!! 
Time to get rid of those triple security checks at SDQ!!!
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WHY LATINOS CAN'T BE TERRORISTS...
1. 8:45 am is too early for us to be up.
2. We are always late; we would have missed all 4 flights.
3. Pretty people on the plane distract us.
4. We would talk loudly and bring attention to ourselves.
5. With food and drinks on the plane, we would forget why
we're there.
6. We talk with our hands; therefore we would have to put
our weapons down.
7. We would ALL want to fly the plane.
8. We would argue and start a fight in the plane.
9. We can't keep a secret; we would have told everyone a
week before doing it.
AND MY FAVORITE.....
10. We would have put our country's flag on the windshield.
ARE YOU A LATINO? HOW CAN YOU TELL FOR SURE?
1) If you have ever been hit by a "Chancleta"
2) If you grew up scared by something called El Cuco or La
Llorona.
3) If others tell you to stop screaming when you are really
just talking.
4) If you light a candle to the Virgin Mary on the night
before your big test.
5) If you use your chin to point something out.
6) If you constantly refer to cereal as "con fleys."
7) If your mother yells at the top of her lungs to call you
for dinner, even if it's a one bedroom apartment.
8) If you can dance merengue, cumbia or salsa without
music.
9) If you use "Manteca" instead of olive oil and can't
figure out why your nalgas are getting bigger.
10) If you are in a five passenger car with seven people in
it and a person is shouting "subanse, todavia caben mas!"
11) If whenever you feel under the weather, you
compulsively dab on some "Vic's vapor rub" all over your
pecho and inside your nostrils.
12) Your mom packs your "lonche" every day even though
you've just turned thirty-two.
13) If you call the North Americans "gringos," including
Canadians, and call all Asian people "chinos" or "chinitos"
and you call the corner store "the chinito's store."
14) If your Papi is in the "Throne" reading El Vocero for
more than half an hour.
15) If all of your female relatives and friends starting
with your Mom are watching "las novelas" in Univision or
Telemundo 24 hours a day and tending to their chores.
16) If 80% of the food in your pantry is Goya.
Time to get rid of those triple security checks at SDQ!!!-----------------------------------------------
WHY LATINOS CAN'T BE TERRORISTS...
1. 8:45 am is too early for us to be up.
2. We are always late; we would have missed all 4 flights.
3. Pretty people on the plane distract us.
4. We would talk loudly and bring attention to ourselves.
5. With food and drinks on the plane, we would forget why
we're there.
6. We talk with our hands; therefore we would have to put
our weapons down.
7. We would ALL want to fly the plane.
8. We would argue and start a fight in the plane.
9. We can't keep a secret; we would have told everyone a
week before doing it.
AND MY FAVORITE.....
10. We would have put our country's flag on the windshield.
ARE YOU A LATINO? HOW CAN YOU TELL FOR SURE?
1) If you have ever been hit by a "Chancleta"
2) If you grew up scared by something called El Cuco or La
Llorona.
3) If others tell you to stop screaming when you are really
just talking.
4) If you light a candle to the Virgin Mary on the night
before your big test.
5) If you use your chin to point something out.
6) If you constantly refer to cereal as "con fleys."
7) If your mother yells at the top of her lungs to call you
for dinner, even if it's a one bedroom apartment.
8) If you can dance merengue, cumbia or salsa without
music.
9) If you use "Manteca" instead of olive oil and can't
figure out why your nalgas are getting bigger.
10) If you are in a five passenger car with seven people in
it and a person is shouting "subanse, todavia caben mas!"
11) If whenever you feel under the weather, you
compulsively dab on some "Vic's vapor rub" all over your
pecho and inside your nostrils.
12) Your mom packs your "lonche" every day even though
you've just turned thirty-two.
13) If you call the North Americans "gringos," including
Canadians, and call all Asian people "chinos" or "chinitos"
and you call the corner store "the chinito's store."
14) If your Papi is in the "Throne" reading El Vocero for
more than half an hour.
15) If all of your female relatives and friends starting
with your Mom are watching "las novelas" in Univision or
Telemundo 24 hours a day and tending to their chores.
16) If 80% of the food in your pantry is Goya.