Hi All, I am hoping to get some advice from the readers of these forums. I live in Canada and recently went on a vacation to DR. I STUPIDLY had unprotected sex with someone I met that lives there and am pregnant. I have his phone number but have not told him. I have not decided whether I will keep the baby or not but if I do what kind of rights would he have to the baby? Would he be able to try and come to Canada or would I have to give him money? I feel like if I have the baby that I would not want to deny the child the right to know who their father is and maybe meet them one day. I know he does not make very much money and am not expecting any sort of financial support from him. SO should I tell him that I am pregnant and if I do what can he do in regards to custody? As I write this I can not believe this is happening to me. Thanks for any help or advice that you could give me.
- Thread starter canadian_nurse
- Start date
Question about parental rights
I think a trip to the clinic to see how many STD's you have should be the first point of call. If you are not going to last another 10-15 years and be ill for alot of those then you need to consider if you want to have the child or not.
canadian_nurse, the first comments to your questions are good one and please get yourself tested as Givadogahome has mentioned.
It's kind of ironic, a NURSE having a one night stand without protection with a guy in a country with such high HIV/AIDS rates.
Don't feel guilty for making a mistake - we're all human, and ignore all those that judge you as they're just throwing stones from glass houses.
It's 2012 sister. Abortion is legal and safe in your country. Take control of your body and your destiny. Just look forward and nip this in the bud while you can!
It's 2012 sister. Abortion is legal and safe in your country. Take control of your body and your destiny. Just look forward and nip this in the bud while you can!
It's the legal forum so let's stick to giving out legal advice as tempting as other things might be.
Here is what the law states as given by our resident lawyer Fabio Guzman. This advice was given in a case where the mother and child were Dominican living in the DR and the father was the foreigner.
Like others have said it's in your hands
Here is what the law states as given by our resident lawyer Fabio Guzman. This advice was given in a case where the mother and child were Dominican living in the DR and the father was the foreigner.
Like others have said it's in your hands
Alcohol
Had you been drinking while of vacation? smoking? were you taking any kinds of medication or drugs? As a Nurse, I'm certain you know that these are factors to consider.
I have two children, I sure as heck wish I did a better job picking their mother.
Good luck.
Had you been drinking while of vacation? smoking? were you taking any kinds of medication or drugs? As a Nurse, I'm certain you know that these are factors to consider.
I have two children, I sure as heck wish I did a better job picking their mother.
Good luck.
You are Canadian, you are in Canada, you can choose to have the baby or not, you can put father unknown or the sperm donors name if you know it. You can choose to give this guy parental rights or not. The only reason the child would need to know his father is for medical reasons ( medical history) I know plenty of successful people that knew only one birth parents or neither in many cases.
I have been to the doctor and tested negative- still need to retest in three months. I am at a point in my life where finiacially and emotionally I feel ready to be a parent. The thing holding me back is it fair to bring a child into the world knowing that their father will never be apart of their life?
First, I agree with the poster about us all making mistakes, God know I've made my share and more. Don't kick yourself over it too long. If you're ready to have a baby then have it. Dominican and Canadian/American/French/etc... children are usually exceptionally bright and beautiful. I know this from first hand experience. Who knows, maybe someday the father may be willing and able to be part of the child's life. Unexpected things often happen for unexpected reasons. Stay positive.
Yes stay positive, just not HIV positive! All jokes aside, I disagree with slas7713, children are not 'usually' exceptionally bright and beautiful. The global gene pool is getting more and more shallow...
If you want to have a baby now, there are better ways to do it. Like...with a man who will support you. Or worst case scenario, from a sperm donation where family medical history and father's intelligence can be pre-screened. Don't let one mistake paint you into a corner. It's 2012 not 1950, you can take control of your own body and destiny.
Also keep in mind that having a child, then never discussing his/her father or the circumstances of your one night stand will be a giant elephant in the room. I also wouldn't want to be a fly on the wall when your child is a teenager and you're sitting down to have that "you should always practice safe sex" talk, do as I say son, not do as I do... err..
With any luck you will not get to spread your gene pool farther. Children of mixed race are often very attractive looking and brain power is more to do with nutrition and education than racial background. As a nurse, who make very good money in Canada, she doesn't need a man to support her.
Your third paragraph - Any mother with a gram of brain power can explain why a child doesn't have a birth-father living with them.
bob - I know you are but what am I?
Just because you don't like me, doesn't mean you have to suspend your mental faculties and talk bull.
If every child was "exceptionally bright" as was suggested, then how would you identify the ones that are stupid and smart? The suggestion that every child is 'exceptionally bright' is false.
I didn't say anything about mixed race children, that's just your inability to read.
And au contraire, you've been out of Canada for a long time, nurses in Canada don't make enough money to afford a child's university education these days.
Finally, take it as you will, as a feminist, it kills me to admit it, but the statistics are stacked against children of single parent families. For every one bill clinton, there are tens of thousands of joe the unsuccessful plumber.
Just because you don't like me, doesn't mean you have to suspend your mental faculties and talk bull.
If every child was "exceptionally bright" as was suggested, then how would you identify the ones that are stupid and smart? The suggestion that every child is 'exceptionally bright' is false.
I didn't say anything about mixed race children, that's just your inability to read.
And au contraire, you've been out of Canada for a long time, nurses in Canada don't make enough money to afford a child's university education these days.
Finally, take it as you will, as a feminist, it kills me to admit it, but the statistics are stacked against children of single parent families. For every one bill clinton, there are tens of thousands of joe the unsuccessful plumber.
Perhaps you go back and re-read what I wrote. Nowhere did I say that these children would be either intelligent or stupid, but that nutrition and education would be more important than how intelligent said father was. Many Dominicans may be ignorant in terms of education and worldly knowledge but do not mistake this for not being intelligent.
I don't like your online persona, perhaps in real life you are actually kind, considerate, and a barrel of laughs.
Nurses make from $27-$40 per hour and usually get a fair amount of overtime and great benefits. Perhaps you are out of touch on nurses salaries.
Two parent families are better when both parents are good parents but a child is better off with one good parent that one good and good lousy regardless of the gender. I know plenty of fathers that are better parents than the mother.
What is wrong with Canadian women it seems I have read about 10 stories like this, are the women in Canada that LONELY. What a MESS. I feel for the unborn child, the OP knew it was a GREAT chance if you have sex with no condom you may have a baby in 9 months.
Can somebody PLEASE!!!! tell me what is so great about Dominicans.
To be honest, from my experience of Canadians, they appear to be super tonto and trusting. They're just too nice to a fault and keep getting taken advantage of outside of their little bambi-land bubble.
The Dominican tigueres must really go to town when those flights arrive from Toronto EH!?
The Dominican tigueres must really go to town when those flights arrive from Toronto EH!?