Having trust issues

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albertaman53

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I married my Dominican wife 5 years ago. She lives with me in Canada. The 2 years before we where married she never asked for anything. Her family accepts me. She treats me well and I believe she loves me. I have totally trusted her up to this year. She visits family every year for 2 months, the last two years I wasn't able to make it.
This year theres been some red flags come up especially with one guy shes been talking to. she won't share any info about him other than he is a friend, she keeps her phone guarded 24/7, tells me she never liked anyone touching her phone. I feel bad that I have had the need to investigate to get information. I checked phone records back for a year and a half. I found that some months she talked to him for over 6 hrs. in a month. Of course I have no idea how long they talked through whattsapp. Probably only used the phone when he didn't have internet. One thing she did say he was married and was helping with advice for immigration. It seems he married a Canadian girl. My suspicion is when he gets to Canada, My wife and him will be going off together. What I really need is someone to listen to some audio clips of her talking on the phone. Can't hear the other person. I don't feel good about having to record some conversations, I've always gave her, her privacy. I dont need the whole translation of recording just idea whats going on. Thanks
 
AlterEgo

AlterEgo

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Drsisterhood.com does investigations on behalf of foreigners married to a Dominicans. *Maybe they can help. *
 
lifeisgreat

lifeisgreat

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My best advice is don't build brick walls between each other they will not come down no matter how hard you try.....be honest and talk to her and tell her your feeelings and listen to hers...if she doesn't respect you enough that it hurts and bothers you..you have your answer ...
 
CristoRey

CristoRey

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If it looks like a duck, waddles like a duck and quacks like a duck..... it sure as hell aint no chicken.
 
M

Meemselle

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Oct 27, 2014
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frank recktenwald said:
How old is your wife?
Click to expand...

Nothing to do with it. Ageist comment.

But this sounds sort of personal. Why put it out there on a public forum....especially one as gimlet-eyed as DR-1?

To the best of my knowledge (woefully inadequate, I do freely admit), there are not a lot of qualified shrinks who respond to such gritos de auxilio.
 
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R

RV429

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Apr 3, 2011
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While I agree with CristoRey, what you must consider is simple: Married Dominican Women do NOT have hours long phone conversations with other men. Period.
You know the answer so your post is looking for confirmation of what you already know. Plan your exit.

Or we are entering sock puppet avenue.?
 
frank recktenwald

frank recktenwald

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Meemselle said:
Nothing to do with it. Ageist comment.

But this sounds sort of personal. Why put it out there on a public forum....especially one as gimlet-eyed as DR-1?

To the best of my knowledge (woefully inadequate, I do freely admit), there are not a lot of qualified shrinks who respond to such gritos de auxilio.
Click to expand...

Do agree with you that it's personal and such matters should not be on a public forum but the OP came with questions.
Therefore my question is relevant because there might be a big difference in age..
No not a lot of certified shrinks but Sigmund Freud is not needed here. ;)
Here is where we missing CC :(
 
keepcoming

keepcoming

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Sometimes those "feelings" are trying to tell you something. If your already doubting her actions...that tells you something..
 
D

Derfish

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Ask her if she would tolerate you spending so much time on the phone with a female human.
Der Fish
 
J

jd426

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Dec 12, 2009
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RV429 said:
While I agree with CristoRey, what you must consider is simple: Married Dominican Women do NOT have hours long phone conversations with other men. Period.
You know the answer so your post is looking for confirmation of what you already know. Plan your exit.

Or we are entering sock puppet avenue.?
Click to expand...

Bingo, there it is..
IF a Married Dominican woman would never get away with such a thing with a Dominican Esposo, why is she trying to get away with it with him ? Cuz he is a Gringo and has less respect for him, or because she is doing what he suspects.. Both of those will not yield a good outcome.
Chances are very high that is will go bad. So as you said , plan your exit strategy , sooner better than later.
 
Z

zoomzx11

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Jan 21, 2006
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Sorry to hear this. Take your time, make sure you know what is going on. Maybe get some professional counseling. It does not look positive from what you have described. Best of luck.*
 
C

cbmitch9

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Nov 3, 2010
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albertaman53 said:
I married my Dominican wife 5 years ago. She lives with me in Canada. The 2 years before we where married she never asked for anything. Her family accepts me. She treats me well and I believe she loves me. I have totally trusted her up to this year. She visits family every year for 2 months, the last two years I wasn't able to make it.
This year theres been some red flags come up especially with one guy shes been talking to. she won't share any info about him other than he is a friend, she keeps her phone guarded 24/7, tells me she never liked anyone touching her phone. I feel bad that I have had the need to investigate to get information. I checked phone records back for a year and a half. I found that some months she talked to him for over 6 hrs. in a month. Of course I have no idea how long they talked through whattsapp. Probably only used the phone when he didn't have internet. One thing she did say he was married and was helping with advice for immigration. It seems he married a Canadian girl. My suspicion is when he gets to Canada, My wife and him will be going off together. What I really need is someone to listen to some audio clips of her talking on the phone. Can't hear the other person. I don't feel good about having to record some conversations, I've always gave her, her privacy. I dont need the whole translation of recording just idea whats going on. Thanks
Click to expand...

Marriage is a serious and personal arrangement. If you have that many doubts and suspicions, ask your self these questions. Is it worth it? how much are your peace of mind and health worth? Can you live without your wife? Were you able to live without her prior to meeting her? Always remember pain is temporary only if you decide to let it go. Ain't no man or woman worth all that bullcrap and headache.
Good luck.
 
B

Berzin

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Nov 17, 2004
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lifeisgreat said:
My best advice is don't build brick walls between each other they will not come down no matter how hard you try.....be honest and talk to her and tell her your feeelings and listen to hers...if she doesn't respect you enough that it hurts and bothers you..you have your answer ...
Click to expand...

This is terrible advice when dealing with a Dominican woman who is more than likely scamming the OP.

For anyone who's ever dated a Dominican man or woman from the island, for way too many of them honesty is a one-way street. You have to be honest, but not them.

The biggest red flag so far no one has caught-the OP is asking for translations of audio transcripts in SPANISH. What does this tell you? This man, unless his wife speaks English, does not speak her native language. What must the communication have been like when they first met?

He already messed up with the phone. When she said she guards her privacy from her own husband, he should have told her "I need to know who you're talking to. Si no, pa'tras a la pobresa si no te gusta".

Ain't no Dominican, man or woman, who is married and visits their family for two months by themselves, leaving their spouse behind without something being up. If she misses her family so much , buy her a one-way ticket "y que se joda".
 
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malko

malko

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Berzin said:
This is terrible advice when dealing with a Dominican woman who is more than likely scamming the OP.

For anyone who's ever dated a Dominican man or woman from the island, for way too many of them honesty is a one-way street. You have to be honest, but not them.

The biggest red flag so far no one has caught-the OP is asking for translations of audio transcripts in SPANISH. What does this tell you? This man, unless his wife speaks English, does not speak her native language. What must the communication have been like when they first met?

He already messed up with the phone. When she said she guards her privacy from her own husband, he should have told her "I need to know who you're talking to. Si no, pa'tras a la pobresa si no te gusta".

Ain't no Dominican, man or woman, who is married and visits their family for two months by themselves, leaving their spouse behind without something being up. If she misses her family so much , buy her a one-way ticket "y que se joda".
Click to expand...

I would go about it the other way......
One married ( *normally its the kind of comittment you think through, and all ) someone, in this case a dominicana, and one cant trust her to go away on holiday by herself ( or without the husband ) ??
Come on! This aint the 70's no more !!
Or you didnt bet on the right horse.......

" I need to know who you talk too " *!!! Very BasharElAssadiiii , to me ;) ;)

I, for one, happen to have a couple of good female-friends. And I phone them, but I dont shag them !!

That said, I do agree that the OP seems to have his doubts, and that in its self is enough for him to know its all going south.
 
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