Why do people ask about love on a message board?

I think whether its a Dominican person or not, new love is always frightening and especially so when its long distance. People want to be comforted that things will work out and if people tell you that it will, might, has a small possibility of success - even if they're strangers - you feel better about the whole situation.
Nobody likes to feel alone...

Anna Coniglio said:

Chuck you are absolutely right. So in your opinion why do people ask a board full of strangers what we think about their love life? Or what we think about some guy/girl we never met.

Maybe I should start a new thread on this

Click to expand...

New Thread

Anna Coniglio said:

Chuck you are absolutely right. So in your opinion why do people ask a board full of strangers what we think about their love life? Or what we think about some guy/girl we never met.

Maybe I should start a new thread on this

Click to expand...

I think a new thread would be appropriate. So many of the folks who come here seeking advice did truly fall in love in the Dominican Republic, or at least one of the parties involved did. Many however lack the financial resources to return often to solidify their relationships with their Dominican love, and the poor Dominican will never be able to afford the cost involved in long distance love without the help of their American, Canadian, or Euro lover. This is truly sad.

Although it is impossible, some may think that the elements of a lasting relationship can be found in the form of a chat room, bulletin board, email, or telephone. Love and relationships are much to complicated for these media, yet many have no other place to turn.

It?s so strange to me that in certain parts of the world, arranged marriages can last lifetimes, yet let a yank come to the DR for 2 weeks, fall in love and listen to how many say it will never work and that the Dominican must be a Sankie. How absurd! There are 2 things that are blind, love and justice, but with luck on your side and a commitment to the truth, it is amazing what can happen.

There are many happy men and women who are in long lasting relationships with Dominicans, and there will be many more. Some of these will fail over time but many will take their place. As far as I know no one has ever died from a broken heart caused by their Dominican lover.

PS. Never judge a Dominican by their past, their life is nothing; I say nothing, like any thing you have ever experienced.
Charlie

Thanks

Anna Coniglio said:

Maybe I should start a new thread on this

Click to expand...

Thanks Anna, I hope this brings new views. "Love is such a wonderful thing"
Charlie

human nature

people everywhere always want a second opinion on big decisions.. that new couch you saw ... your new boyfriend...your blind date last night.. it's only natural...

in case like this where all your friends are likely to tell you that you are NUTS ...a poor dominican girl/boy far away.. you find a nice forum where you hope dominican friendly people willing to tell you how nice joel from animacion really is.

boy, you are mistaken if you think you'll get fuzzies from these forums. LOL.

anyway.. MHO.. didnt you ever ask someone what they thought of your boyfriend or to go to the store with you for a second opinion on that expensive natuzzi leather couch??

may be it s the distance make that many woman write on their new love.it s easy to know someone when you live in the same city but when you meet someone in holiday it s a little bit more hard to know.so if you look many of this woman are meet her new love in hotel or around tourist area so it s just take a chance to see if other have meet her new love and if he do the same thing with everyone....and I think inside her this woman know then this kind of man meet many woman each week but just hope then she meet the different one ...I will tell you funny story I was meet a man in dr like 1 year ago and me I don t really believe on information on someone on net so I never asking anything I just go living there and see what it s really happen with that.finally it s finish but like few time after my coming back at home we talking at phone and he asking me if I writting something about him on net ....it s was not me but other woman who was just coming back of her holiday and think it s was her love!!!!! for the information it s not on dr1 she writting but other one....so when I see that I just thinking then maybe I will not losing my time if I was asking like her but I am happy of what I have living and now I know then I want to go back there living not because I love someone but because I like this country, the people and the many new friend I make outside of hotel

and woman just a advice the only way to know if your new love it s really one it s to go live there and see how he will do when he know you don t leave in 1,2 or 3 week.....because on phone, or short stay is easy to lie and make that perfect

So true Anna

Anna Coniglio said:

After all we don't know you or him so how can we tell you " yes he's great go marry him"


I don't really think that's the response the poster is looking for when they write in though. I think they are willing to listen, but the message somehow gets lost on them because of obvious reasons, sarcasm on our part, derogatory statements, sometimes we get so frustrated repeating the same things over and over again that we lose patience, and that's understandable. But the person asking advice should remember to take the good with the bad. I just hope they're smart enough to get past the sarcasm and heed the message. There is always a message in there.

Click to expand...

Anna Coniglio said:

Chuck you are absolutely right. So in your opinion why do people ask a board full of strangers what we think about their love life? Or what we think about some guy/girl we never met.

Maybe I should start a new thread on this

Ok started a new thread on this.

I've always been curious why people mostly women come to a message board full of strangers and ask what we think about their love life?

Is it because they have many doubts?
Is it because their family and friends say it won't work out and they need approval from somebody/anybody?
Is it that after reading the many posts they see something in their own man that rings a bell?

I would also like to know if most of these people fell in love on the first or second visit on the Island and had just come out of a relationship back home.

If you don't want to post about it you can email or PM me with your story. Your name will never be mentioned.

Thanks

Click to expand...

I would like to ask a question of your question

Why would anyone ask about "Why do people ask about love on a message board?" on a message board?

Not trying to be cheeky, curious as to the reasoning behind this particular question


A>

Argo, I'm sure that Anna will give her own reply, but I can tell you it is a question a lot of us are asking--though this is the first time it has been the subject of its own thread.

It appears from the number of posts that you are a relative newcomer to the board. If you stay with the board, a few months from now you, too, may be wondering why it is that so many women post such detailed information about their romance with some Dominican they met at a hotel during their one week vacation.

obviously a newbie...

read the forums... then you will understand!

Argo said:

I would like to ask a question of your question

Why would anyone ask about "Why do people ask about love on a message board?" on a message board?

Not trying to be cheeky, curious as to the reasoning behind this particular question

A>

Click to expand...

For all those people chasing, dating or married to a Dominican. Friendship, Love, Sex, and Marriage, it's all here!

Click to expand...

Maybe it's because they are specifically invited to do so? It has often bothered me that there is a specific forum for these types of questions (including a sub-forum for "sankies") and yet people ALWAYS question the poster on why they are posting.

Rose

My dumb

Ken said:

Argo, I'm sure that Anna will give her own reply, but I can tell you it is a question a lot of us are asking--though this is the first time it has been the subject of its own thread.

It appears from the number of posts that you are a relative newcomer to the board. If you stay with the board, a few months from now you, too, may be wondering why it is that so many women post such detailed information about their romance with some Dominican they met at a hotel during their one week vacation.

Click to expand...

I was making a sorry attempt at humour, I hope no one was offended and my purpose was certainly not that :-(

A>

Maybe they're looking for other people with similar experiences...

Maybe they are looking for someone outside their circle of family and friends to validate what they are feeling...they probably suspect that something is not right and are looking for someone who has "been there and done that" to give them advice...

Maybe it has to do with the anonymity factor...

Really, why does anyone post about anything to a group of virtual strangers? Isn't that the beauty of the Internet and communities like this?

Strangers

Anna Coniglio said:

I wouldn't post what I did, do or will do in the DR on a message board. But that's just me.

Click to expand...

I have been giving some real thought as to why I did ask total strangers for advice on my relationships in the DR. The answers to my own questions are coming slowly, but I am getting a clearer picture now.

The first thing I guess was the big question, ?am I the only person in the world that has fallen in love with a Dominican, while on a short visit to the DR?. It all seemed so strange to me, boy meets girl, boy and girl fall in lust, lust continues and love develops. Hey I need some advice, but no one I know has ever had this happen to them. Okay I?ll ask the folks at DR1, they seem to have most of the answers of life and love in the DR. Whether they are right or wrong, they have some answers, and after all I don?t have to talk to them face to face, in fact I can mask my identity so they don?t even know who I am. I write, they responded, and then it was up to me to decide what good advice was and which was not.

Second I think was the race and cultural difference in my case, I am white and she is black, I am upper middle class, and she is dirt poor, oh yes, I am 59 and she is 25. This was not at all expectable in my circle of friends or family, so I needed more answers. Where, my new friends, and strangers at DR1.

Continued trips to the DR only leave more unanswered questions, so back to my friends and strangers at DR1.

I think that anyone on this forum that really wants answers can find them here. It will not take you long to discern who is giving you the best advice, and some of the answers are quite entertaining. There are a lot of creative writers to be found here.

I can honestly say that my relationship with my Dominican love has been greatly enhanced by the strangers and friends I have found on DR1. After all, I can listen, respond, and bare my soul and never have to see these people, if I wish not to.

The only danger I see in sharing our relationships with total strangers is, sometimes they tell you what you want to hear and you believe it fits you situation. Don?t fall for this; you must ultimately make your own decisions, regardless of what you read here. No matter how wrong or right the answers sound, it is you life, not that of the responder, make your own decisions based on the best information you can find, whether it be from strangers or other sources.
Charlie

just 2 words...

go charlie!

posting

I think that people post on this board things about their love life and have questions because many of their friends and families have not been to the DR and don't know what its like. Some girls don't get attention in their own countries and I have been there and seen the most unattractive women getting tons of attention from these relatively cute guys. They come here to "post" because this is a DR forum board and they feel that you people know a lot about the DR. I don't know how many of you actually live here or what. But I love reading the stories........keep posting em!! :rambo:

I think Anna was right. One should have other people, and not strangers, who opinnion they value. I say theyre just bragging. Or possibly its their first relationship ever.
TEHAMA
(sounds a little bitter huh? Oh well)