Some Military Humor

sunshine_79

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This is for all you vets on here as well as those still serving. Everyone else might not understand so don't say I didn't warn you...



US Marine Corp Rules for Gunfighting

1. Be courteous to everyone, friendly to no one.
2. Decide to be aggressive ENOUGH, quickly ENOUGH.
3. Have a plan.
4. Have a back-up plan, because the first one probably won't work.
5. Be polite. Be professional but, have a plan to kill everyone you meet.
6. Do not attend a gunfight with a handgun whose caliber does not start with a "4."
7. Anything worth shooting is worth shooting twice. Ammo is cheap. Life is expensive.
8. Move away from your attacker. Distance is your friend. (Lateral & diagonal preferred.)
9. Use cover or concealment as much as possible.
10. Flank your adversary when possible. Protect yours.
11. Always cheat; always win. The only unfair fight is the one you lose.
12. In ten years nobody will remember the details of caliber, stance or tactics. They will only remember who lived.
13. If you are not shooting, you should be communicating or reloading.
14. Someday someone may kill you with your own gun, but they should have to beat you to death with it because it is empty.
15. And above all ... don't drop your guard.



US Army Rules For Gunfighting

1. Walk in 50 miles wearing 75 pound ruck while starving.
2. Locate individuals requiring killing.
3. Request permission via radio from "Higher" to perform killing.
4. Curse bitterly when mission is aborted.
5. Walk out 50 miles wearing a 75 pound ruck while starving.


US Air Force Rules For Gunfighting

1. Have a cocktail
2. Adjust temperature on air-conditioner
3. See what's on HBO
4. Determine "What is a gunfight?"
5. Request more funding from Congress with a "killer" PowerPoint presentation
6. Wine & dine 'key' Congressmen, invite DoD & defense industry executives
7. Receive funding, set up new command and assemble assets
8. Declare the assets "strategic" and never deploy them operationally
9. Tell the Navy to send the Marines

US Navy Rules For Gunfighting

1. Go to Sea
2. Drink Coffee
3. Watch porn
4. Send the Marines
 

Ricardo900

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Jul 12, 2004
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sunshine_79 said:
US Air Force Rules For Gunfighting

1. Have a cocktail
2. Adjust temperature on air-conditioner
3. See what's on HBO
4. Determine "What is a gunfight?"
5. Request more funding from Congress with a "killer" PowerPoint presentation
6. Wine & dine 'key' Congressmen, invite DoD & defense industry executives
7. Receive funding, set up new command and assemble assets
8. Declare the assets "strategic" and never deploy them operationally
9. Tell the Navy to send the Marines

Ha, I resent that:laugh:
It's not my fault I scored to high on the ASVAB:classic:

Ricardo USAF
F-16 (Fighting Falcon) Flight-Line Technician
Sheppard AFB, Wichita Falls, Texas (Hooyahh)
 

sunshine_79

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Ricardo900 said:
Ha, I resent that:laugh:
It's not my fault I scored to high on the ASVAB:classic:

Ricardo USAF
F-16 (Fighting Falcon) Flight-Line Technician
Sheppard AFB, Wichita Falls, Texas (Hooyahh)



LMAO... :p
 

Ricardo900

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Jul 12, 2004
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US Coast Guard Rule For Gunfighting

1.:rolleyes:
2.:rolleyes:
3.:rolleyes:
4.:rolleyes:
5.:rolleyes:
6.:rolleyes:
7. Still thinking
8.:rolleyes:
9.:rolleyes:
10. Bully boat people
 

sunshine_79

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Ricardo900 said:
US Coast Guard Rule For Gunfighting

1.
2.
3.
4.
5.
6.
7. Still thinking
8.
9.
10. Bully boat people


The Coast Guard???? You mean ... they're part of the military? :: scratching head ::

;)
 

sunshine_79

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JDJones said:
You better believe it, sister.. But we save lives when we're not fighting..


I know you do Darling. But I have to have someone to pick on! ;)