Speaking of friends...

jrf said:

I have made a number of friends in the RD and email, messenger, and phone them regularly.

Now, when I mention that they give me a call here in Canada even just for a quick hello they don't seem to call.

Trying to see if that is something of their 'culture' of if they just don't want to take the time to call. I know it is not that expensive for a three minute call to Canada-it's cheaper there than from here to there.

Any thoughts?

Click to expand...

It's true it's cheaper to call from the DR to Canada but compared to salaries, it ends up more expensive... Then you have the people who use calling cards who might either not have access or not have enough $ left to make a long distance call. Also, depending on their economic class, making a long distance call is sometimes an event.

It's not just the per min cost but to use a cell cost money but incoming call don't add up there as I understand it.

Maybe....!

jrf said:

I have made a number of friends in the RD and email, messenger, and phone them regularly.

Now, when I mention that they give me a call here in Canada even just for a quick hello they don't seem to call.

Trying to see if that is something of their 'culture' of if they just don't want to take the time to call. I know it is not that expensive for a three minute call to Canada-it's cheaper there than from here to there.

Any thoughts?

Click to expand...

With all honesty, maybe they don't care about you as much as you think, or as much as you for them.

I used to have a few friends that I "tested" many moons ago. I said to myself: "since I am the one calling all the time, let me stop calling and let's wait and see if they call at all, let see if they care as much".

Well, a few called and those that did not, stopped being my friends. As easy as that!.

Btw, there should NO EXCUSES. If they truly care, even if they have to borrow 20 pesos and make a 2 minutes call, they would.

Money Calls

jrf said:

....Trying to see if that is something of their 'culture' of if they just don't want to take the time to call....

Click to expand...

The truth is, that in their view, you are not worth a call.
Sorry about being frank.

Simple test:
Tell them to call you in ten minutes to copy a Western Union remittance number.

They'll call you this time.

m'frog

I agree with miguel. Either they are too poor to call or just don't care to call. You see, yoiu are not the only friend they have in north america. Every week different tourists come to hotels and become friends with them. They have so many friends that they don't know who lives where. They can't possible call all of them. Maybe they are only friendly towards you but not really your friends. This is common in the resort culture.
AZB

Its always about $$$$ they don't have any!:lick:

miguel said:

With all honesty, maybe they don't care about you as much as you think, or as much as you for them.

I used to have a few friends that I "tested" many moons ago. I said to myself: "since I am the one calling all the time, let me stop calling and let's wait and see if they call at all, let see if they care as much".

Well, a few called and those that did not, stopped being my friends. As easy as that!.

Btw, there should NO EXCUSES. If they truly care, even if they have to borrow 20 pesos and make a 2 minutes call, they would.

Click to expand...

Hey, PM me you most recent number in Alaska and I will call you every day. BTW, can I barrow 20 bucks.

Chuckuindy

Grandpa!

chuckuindy said:

Hey, PM me you most recent number in Alaska and I will call you every day. BTW, can I barrow 20 bucks.

Chuckuindy

Click to expand...

Heyy, we DID used to call each other every now and then, right Grandpa?.

No, no 20 bucks for you.

I can give you an Ipod Voice Recorder, though!. Hahahahahaha.

jrf said:

I have made a number of friends in the RD and email, messenger, and phone them regularly.

Now, when I mention that they give me a call here in Canada even just for a quick hello they don't seem to call.

Trying to see if that is something of their 'culture' of if they just don't want to take the time to call. I know it is not that expensive for a three minute call to Canada-it's cheaper there than from here to there.

Any thoughts?

Click to expand...

Don't be discouraged. But is a male thing, dominican men don't go around calling each other on the phone and having conversations. Its easier for them to have a conversation over a few "grandes bien frias" than to get on the phone and call u. Its all in good fun.

I see it allthe time in my family we have many friends and relatives that we "hang out with, drink and be merry" when we go there, we leave and don't talk for a while then we get together again and its like we never left. We don't reproach(sp.?) each other when we meet again, or anything, we just pick up where we left it, and everyone is happy.

Come on!

M.A.R. said:

But is a male thing, dominican men don't go around calling each other on the phone and having conversations.

Click to expand...

Please don't generalize. Maybe the Dominican men YOU know don't do as such.

ALLLLL my TRUE (note: TRUE) Dominican male friends do. The one that did not, proved to me that they are not truly friends and were "waved goodbye".

There are other conversations that can be discussed not just getting together and drink a few beers.

Which true friend, after telling him/her to call you, would not?. Only a friend that it's not a true friend would do that, DOMINICAN OR NOT. Simple.

calmate

miguel said:

Please don't generalize. Maybe the Dominican men YOU know don't do as such.

ALLLLL my TRUE (note: TRUE) Dominican male friends do. The one that did not, proved to me that they are not truly friends and were "waved goodbye".

There are other conversations that can be discussed not just getting together and drink a few beers.

Which true friend, after telling him/her to call you, would not?. Only a friend that it's not a true friend would do that, DOMINICAN OR NOT. Simple.

Click to expand...

So goes to tell you that these so called friends of the OP are not really friends, ok.

anyway you don't seem to be a typical dominican male. is true what AZB says, once you have lived out of the DR for years and years you lose some of that dominicanism.

My dominican friends dont really call me either (i have to say, im not calling them either), we just speak on the msn and we are sending eachother messages on the phone.
BUT (lol, ok maybe this is a little bit different) when my boyfriend was here he called his mom 1 time a week, and when he didnt call exactly that day she would call immediately...so its probably just a case of priorities... it could be that they just dont care about you or its just not so important to them (at least not enough to spend money on) When Im on the DR, i usually let people call me too (that's cheaper too) and i dont really see the point in spending 100 peso on a 2 minute converstation

Oh boy1

M.A.R. said:

anyway you don't seem to be a typical dominican male. is true what AZB says, once you have lived out of the DR for years and years you lose some of that dominicanism.

Click to expand...

I will be brief with you and maybe you can get the point.

I have a "truck load" of true Dominican friends living in the DR, as in Republica Dominicana, and the US, that are TRUE friends and we call each other all the time, ALL the time. Not daily but enough.

And, since when do you listen to anything that axx-hole says, hahahaha. Me made a joke, or did I.

Again, it all depends on how good friends they are. See, simple!.

ok papi

miguel said:

I will be brief with you and maybe you can get the point.

I have a "truck load" of true Dominican friends living in the DR, as in Republica Dominicana, and the US, that are TRUE friends and we call each other all the time, ALL the time. Not daily but enough.

And, since when do you listen to anything that axx-hole says, hahahaha. Me made a joke, or did I.

Again, it all depends on how good friends they are. See, simple!.

Click to expand...

yeah one of my very few faults is that I tend to generalize pretty often, another thing about dominican men is that they tend to .....never mind.

btw: are all dominican men as uptight as u are???? me make a joke too. hahahah

Well....

M.A.R. said:

yeah one of my very few faults is that I tend to generalize pretty often, another thing about dominican men is that they tend to .....never mind.

btw: are all dominican men as uptight as u are???? me make a joke too. hahahah

Click to expand...

No, just the ones that are VERRRRY smart and do not generalize. Shut up AZB, I am smart, darn it!. Lol.

Btw, cojelo con suavena tiguerita. (see, even I can "talk" Dominican even if I don't live there).

Honestly, take my advice and dont ever count on these people as being friends...it is all a front to use you since if you have a "friendship", you will know doubt bring regalitos on future visits..hence they have something to gain...you see, this is a type of relationship where there is nothing in it for you! You will call, buys gifts etc. Not to say we have friendships for material gain in our society but they (sorry to generalize) , are in it for that alone. I agree with AZB (for once!!) and his "resort culture" theory...its just like with the sankies...as you flight departs, many others are landing filled with unsusupecting tourists who form "friendships" with these people. They will make a point to remember your name and where you are from to make a good impression for the duration of your trip...out sight is out of mind to be perfectly honest. save yourself money and disappointment...zero expectations=zero disappointments. None of these "friendships" are real, they are bogus. Go on vacation, talk to people, have fun, then go home to reality.

drloca said:

Honestly, take my advice and dont ever count on these people as being friends...it is all a front to use you since if you have a "friendship", you will know doubt bring regalitos on future visits..hence they have something to gain...you see, this is a type of relationship where there is nothing in it for you! You will call, buys gifts etc. Not to say we have friendships for material gain in our society but they (sorry to generalize) , are in it for that alone. I agree with AZB (for once!!) and his "resort culture" theory...its just like with the sankies...as you flight departs, many others are landing filled with unsusupecting tourists who form "friendships" with these people. They will make a point to remember your name and where you are from to make a good impression for the duration of your trip...out sight is out of mind to be perfectly honest. save yourself money and disappointment...zero expectations=zero disappointments. None of these "friendships" are real, they are bogus. Go on vacation, talk to people, have fun, then go home to reality.

Click to expand...

DRLoca, I have to completely agree with you....they make you feel so special by remembering who are, but as soon as you leave, they don't give 2 rats about you.

There was a time I used to live in hotels in puerto plata when I first started out visiting this country in the 80's. My best friend was an activity director. He used to get me super discount in the hotel so I used to stay there for as long as a month at a time. I used to see all these so called "chocolate friends" in action. Each member of the resort team had a million friends all over the world. they were all nice to every visiting tourist. These same tourists would confuse them for friends and give them gifts ranging from small cheap items to 100 dollar sneakers to expensive designer clothing. Many of these resort workers were living in 400 dollar apartments when they actually made 100 dollars / month. Let me remind you 400 dollars used to be alot of money in dominican republic in the mid 80's. Guess how they were paying for it?
The more handsome guys got the best gifts from all the girls in the world. they always had a new girlfriend visiting them from either europe or north america. This is a common routine so no one even cares who work with these scums. My friend had protected me from these leaches from the very beginning and kept me at bay from them. He informed me of their activity from the very beginning. I have learned not to make friends with the resort employees and simply stay away from this resort culture. i go there with friends from my town, have fun, drink , eat , swim and then come back to my beautiful city. Life goes on.
AZB