Allrighty then: I've lived off and on in the Dominican Republic since about 2008 and I may have a little banana down in the D.R. that is currently a couple of months old. I'm in the process of working out a DNA test. Got a lawyer, etc. I'm sending money right now to help with expenses. The pictures of the child look a lot like me and I did have frequent flyer miles with the chica so I'm thinking the child is mine. I'm a U.S. Citizen. If the child is mine - I'm going to get a CROBA for U.S. Citizenship for the child and I'm going to pay support since getting custody is even less likely for me in the D.R. than it is in the U.S. That sucks since I'd like custody but what's a guy to do. The mom and family seem decent by Dominican standards, no drugs, no prostitution. But they are typical in the way they deal with the gringo. In other words they work every angle to get something for nothing. Even after a couple of years of dealing with this from many Dominican women - I still got to laugh with the crap they come up with. Still, it's a hell of a lot easier and less expensive than dealing with a woman in the U.S. But I digress. <?xml:namespace prefix = o ns = "urn:schemas-microsoft-comfficeffice" /><o></o>
I'm here in the hopes of getting some feedback from someone with more experience than I have. So here we go.
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1) Should I deal with the mother directly for child support and visitation or should I go through the Dominican court system? (I haven't been impressed with what I've seen on how the courts deal with gringos)<o></o>
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2) If I let the Dominican court legally establish paternity, visitation and support - I know that the D.R. doesn't have a set amount of money based on income like the United States and it's up to the judge but what percentage of my income am I looking at if I let a Dominican Court make a decision (someone with experience please). I ask because if they tell me to give up 50% (in the U.S. it can be up to 60% but thankfully they've got fromulas to determne the level of financial raping of the man) of my income they can KISS MY GRINGO ASS. I've got no problem supporting my kid but I didn't sign on to support the entire extended family. F'n latin cultures, it's just how they roll.
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****FYI - I say let because right now the Hauge treaty for child support hasn't been ratified by the U.S. nor is it likely to be in the near future. There is no reciprocal agreement between the U.S. or any State for reciprocal child support with the D.R. Because of the difference in the laws (there is a legal term - spoke with my lawyer here in the U.S.) a Dominican Court decision for child support can't be enforced in the United States. Yes, there may be a few work arounds to this but for the most part, unless I'm on Dominican soil I can say kiss my ass to any bull****. So if I wanted to just walk away --- but that isn't the case and I wanted and want to be a dad so really the point is moot.<o></o>
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3) If I go through the hassle of the Dominican Courts can I get manditory visitation to the United states for the child? How, and how well can I ensure my visitation rights if the mother wants to play the Dominican/Gringo game of how can I get his money?<o></o>
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4) Do I have any way of forcing the mother to send the child to a better school? Hell I'm paying for it so I'd like to my kid to have the opportunities.
5) Is there an age that the child can determine what parant to live with?
6) What kind of B.S. can I expect from the mother and how may I do what is best for the child without getting F'd by the mother and her family (yes, they all get together and discuss how to take advantage in typical Dominican fashion)?
Now, I'm asking all this because I'm looking to be the dad and I'm totally cool with that. But I don't want to get F'd around if the mother tries to use the child for cash (and she does even though she would swear on a stack of Bibles that she isn't in it for the money, typical Dominican **** but what can you do.) Here in the United States I would use the legal system because I have some confidence in it's being enforced. i.e. I support my kid, I get time with my kid..... But in the D.R. I've seen **** that has made my jaw drop with respect to the legal system. So there it is in a nutshell fellas. Any advice? Please feel free to email if you don't want to post. I've got my lawyers on both sides of the pond but actual experience is priceless. <o></o>
I'm here in the hopes of getting some feedback from someone with more experience than I have. So here we go.
<o></o>
1) Should I deal with the mother directly for child support and visitation or should I go through the Dominican court system? (I haven't been impressed with what I've seen on how the courts deal with gringos)<o></o>
<o></o>
2) If I let the Dominican court legally establish paternity, visitation and support - I know that the D.R. doesn't have a set amount of money based on income like the United States and it's up to the judge but what percentage of my income am I looking at if I let a Dominican Court make a decision (someone with experience please). I ask because if they tell me to give up 50% (in the U.S. it can be up to 60% but thankfully they've got fromulas to determne the level of financial raping of the man) of my income they can KISS MY GRINGO ASS. I've got no problem supporting my kid but I didn't sign on to support the entire extended family. F'n latin cultures, it's just how they roll.
<o></o>
****FYI - I say let because right now the Hauge treaty for child support hasn't been ratified by the U.S. nor is it likely to be in the near future. There is no reciprocal agreement between the U.S. or any State for reciprocal child support with the D.R. Because of the difference in the laws (there is a legal term - spoke with my lawyer here in the U.S.) a Dominican Court decision for child support can't be enforced in the United States. Yes, there may be a few work arounds to this but for the most part, unless I'm on Dominican soil I can say kiss my ass to any bull****. So if I wanted to just walk away --- but that isn't the case and I wanted and want to be a dad so really the point is moot.<o></o>
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3) If I go through the hassle of the Dominican Courts can I get manditory visitation to the United states for the child? How, and how well can I ensure my visitation rights if the mother wants to play the Dominican/Gringo game of how can I get his money?<o></o>
<o></o>
4) Do I have any way of forcing the mother to send the child to a better school? Hell I'm paying for it so I'd like to my kid to have the opportunities.
5) Is there an age that the child can determine what parant to live with?
6) What kind of B.S. can I expect from the mother and how may I do what is best for the child without getting F'd by the mother and her family (yes, they all get together and discuss how to take advantage in typical Dominican fashion)?
Now, I'm asking all this because I'm looking to be the dad and I'm totally cool with that. But I don't want to get F'd around if the mother tries to use the child for cash (and she does even though she would swear on a stack of Bibles that she isn't in it for the money, typical Dominican **** but what can you do.) Here in the United States I would use the legal system because I have some confidence in it's being enforced. i.e. I support my kid, I get time with my kid..... But in the D.R. I've seen **** that has made my jaw drop with respect to the legal system. So there it is in a nutshell fellas. Any advice? Please feel free to email if you don't want to post. I've got my lawyers on both sides of the pond but actual experience is priceless. <o></o>