divorce

lauramendoza said:

I live in Canada (I am canadian) my soon to be ex-husband lives in Dominican. I have not seen him since December 2010. I just had his child. He has disconnected his phone. He blocked my facebook, skype and msn. He has had his friends change phone numbers and block me. He took my money and bought a recording studio and put it in his house. He has lied to me about it for 2 years.
I want full custody of our child. I want my money back.
I want to know how much this is going to cost me and what if anything am I going to get back.
I have his address and I really want to call the police there if he does not pay me!

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you are married, her he is entitled to half of wha tis your, so leave it all alone, and chalk it up to lesson learned or you may begivinghim more money than you already have. petitition for custody and he won't respond so you will get that.

You have custody, you have the child. If he has a does not have a visa he cannot fly to you to harass you and he sounds like he doesn't care. Arrange a divorce and move on, you'll never collect money. Call Attorney Guzman if you want to know your rights in the DR.

I think you've already got the best advice from the first two posters. Chalk it up to a life experience, love your child, forget about the Ahole, he can only make things worse. Move on.

It is just too bad you did not come across this site before. We could have game you a few pointers on the the way these chumps operate.

Did you hear this Flor21? Prime example!!!!!

Good luck to you and your child and wash that ahole right out of your hair.

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As always, MONEY IS THE ROOT OF ALL EVIL!!!! You have YOUR CHILD, which is the most precious gift the MAN UPSTAIRS has given you! Forget the PAST, live for the future...YOUR FUTURE and that of your child's!!!!! Enjoy the money by spending it on yourselves rather than spending it needlessly on that JERK, I mean, is he REALLY WORTH IT???? CONGRATULATIONS!!!!!

By the way, boy or girl?

lauramendoza said:

I live in Canada (I am canadian) my soon to be ex-husband lives in Dominican. I have not seen him since December 2010. I just had his child. He has disconnected his phone. He blocked my facebook, skype and msn. He has had his friends change phone numbers and block me. He took my money and bought a recording studio and put it in his house. He has lied to me about it for 2 years.
I want full custody of our child. I want my money back.
I want to know how much this is going to cost me and what if anything am I going to get back.
I have his address and I really want to call the police there if he does not pay me!

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You DONT get your money back on the downside, but on the upside as his wife using your money you are HALF owner of everything he does own.
So you can go there and paint your name on that studio and ta-dow! its legal.

You already have FULL custody of your child because he abandoned you.
To me, you are playing the wrong side. Be patient and when this recording studio blows up(goes gold) you are entitled legally to HALF. It was your seed money to start this business and a joint business venture as a married couple. If it is his house and you know where he lives then wait for the Gravy Train and tax that sh!t for 50% of the profits.

Walk away with a lesson learned. You have the kid. Going after him will get you nothing but heartache, cost you a ton of money and you will lose in the end after many years and lots of money lining the pockets of his lawyers. You are not alone in this experience. Read archived posts and you will see that your story is very typical. Dont feel bad as these guys are experts at this game and many women get taken just like you. Sorry that you had to learn a tough lesson this way but dont get sucked into thinking you will get revenge.

lauramendoza said:

He has disconnected his phone. He blocked my facebook, skype and msn. He has had his friends change phone numbers and block me. Document it. When he can't be found to serve papers, court will take into consideration your attemptsHe took my money and bought a recording studio and put it in his house. He has lied to me about it for 2 years. You were married it became his when you sent it to him, lying isn't against the law
I want full custody of our child. Considering he's breaking off contact, probably isn't offering to help, shouldn't have problem getting this in Canada. Don't forget to request that the court give you independent right to travel so baby can leave Canada Also, if there is a way to get him blocked from getting into Canada by another marriage, find out about that. I want my money back.You're Canadian have a great life ahead of you, didn't end up an unfortunate victim of domestic abuse, have your child with you, ex isn't in Canada. Make a clean break. The money isn't going to matter in the scope of your entire life. I want to know how much this is going to cost me and what if anything am I going to get back.Way too much, heartache, no satisfaction
I have his address and I really want to call the police there if he does not pay me!

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If you have connections with the balls enough to go get your stuff for you, try that. Police aren't there to help you, nor is the legal system.

You can spend the next two years loving that baby and giving it what it needs--you at your best. Or you can spend two years (or more) chasing something that you're not going to get, regretting the time you lost with the baby. Don't let him take more than he already has.

La Rubia said:

Or you can spend two years (or more) chasing something that you're not going to get

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Exactly. I like the reference "something" because that is exactly what he is "a thing"!!

Forgive him and move on. It feels terrible to be taken advantage of, but it happens to most people once in a while. You have your health and your child, and will be able to move on with your life. Best wishes to you and your daughter!

Alyonka said:

Forgive him and move on. It feels terrible to be taken advantage of, but it happens to most people once in a while. You have your health and your child, and will be able to move on with your life. Best wishes to you and your daughter!

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NO.. I really could not say THAT IT HAPPENS TO MOST PEOPLE once in a while??????? To be lied to for TWO years ?? To the point of MARRIAGE? To the point where you turn over .. well , it seems like ALL this poor woman?s savings.

Honestly, ususally I do not have a lot of sympathy for the women who get sankified

but I want to really pound this guy.

There should be some sort of private enforcement force available,...

who could go over and ...

well.. get the equipment and sell it and send the money for the kid,

At least I think she should go to the government and get money,

Is his name on the birth certificate? I doubt it.

(But, ok, you can spend a few minutes trying to forgive him and remembering the good times for the sake of your child, while I hold the anger for you!)

Well, she should try to get justice, but there is no point in spending too much time and mental energy on someone who is just not worth it. She got a child out of this marriage, and can try getting her money back. But thinking and being angry at some guy who can't even make his own income, and has to use women for that??? It is just not worth the time. Basically she is not a looser here. She has her daughter. He is a looser. She should be happy that he is not some mentally and physically abusive jerk, but only a pathetic thief to steal from a female. She is a healthy young woman with so many opportunities in life.

yes, You are rightm Alyonka. And it is always a good idea to try to find SOMETHING good to say to a child about the father. I mean, she did love him enough to marry him and have his child. It is soooo sad to see this going on. That the child is going to be deprived of a relationship with her extended family, her Dominican roots, an entire SIDE of her heritage, simply because this guy wanted the money fast. So sad. Such a heartbreaker.

This time, I really feel for the OP.

mountainannie said:

This time, I really feel for the OP.

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There are tons of cases like this. This is why, when someone comes to the board requesting info on their sankie, we are harsh and give out some tough love so this would not happen.

OP don't beat yourself up over this. I know it is easier said then done but don't waste one more precious minute wondering why he did this. Just remember karma is a b**ch. As far as the God question, they will read the bible, quote the bible, pray morning and night and then go out and cheat, rob etc...From the way I see it, its his lose. Take this as a lesson learned and move on. Best of luck.

Thank your lucky stars he has no VISA. If you stay in Canada, you have the sole custody of the child, with no worries of him showing up!!!!

Laura,
You can go over in your head a million times the who's, what's and why's of what happened to you but in the end the stress of it will only take years off of your life, not his. I know a thing or two about rabia, revenge, and anger. I have friends that call me when the want to "ge even" with some man who has wronged them but in the end you only end up wasting your own energy. Be thankful that your child is healthy and continue on with your life. I know that it is easier said than done. My son's father, athough never asked me for money, had several women, one that he even married only for the sake of a VISA to the US. These type of people will get theirs in the end. It always comes.
About 3 weeks ago I had a long talk with a pysician I have known for a long time. I was coming off of an argument on this very board and was telling him about it. As I was talking with him,he told me that in the world there are just some idiots, and there is nothing you can do about them. Why should I waste my breath and energy telling them that their idiots?? Deep down they know that they are. Your husband knows he's an ass, a cheat, a liar. Let God handle him and you enjoy your baby. In a few years you will see what I am talking about.
The sun is much brighter now, since I promised that physician that I would stop trying to be the world's advocate...let the idiots be idiots, let the thieve be theives, let the liars be liars, let the stupid be sankified. No me importa, let him be girl.....have fun, live life, love your daughter. When you harbor anger and resentment, he wins. Let it go and you win.....in the last 2 weeks alone I have been blessed with some things that I never thought would happen and I know that its because of the conscious choice that I made. Here is a quote my physician friend gave me....
"Any fact facing us is not as important as our attitude toward it, for that determines our success or failure" -Norman Vincent Peale

Stand up, brush your shoulder off and keep going
Good luck

SHALENA