A horse walks into a bar...

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mobrouser

Bronze
Jan 1, 2002
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A horse walks into a bar.

The bartender asks "You're in here a lot, are you an alcoholic?"
The horse ponders for a moment, responds "I don't think I am" and poof he disappears.

This is where philosophy students start to snicker as they are familiar with Descartes' postulate "I think, therefore I am".
And telling you that first would be putting Descartes before the horse.
 
R

RV429

Bronze
Apr 3, 2011
1,574
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36
I've had Barcel? and don't get it.
Maybe Chic can explain, she speaks the language.
 
Xavier_Onassis

Xavier_Onassis

Gold
Aug 6, 2006
8,775
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If the person telling the story had mentioned Ren? Descartes, the author of the famous statement "Cogito, ergo sum./ Je pense, donc je suis./ I think, therefore I am." at the beginning of this tale, they would be putting (ie mentioning) Descartes before (mentioning) the horse.

The horse, upon stating "I don't think..." *poof!* vanishes before completing the statement, as he no longer thinks, and therefore no longer exists.

It is rather painful to explain jokes, but there you have it.

Deep philosophical jokes are, peut-etre, not for everyone.

You are on your own after this,
As they say in London, "pas de la Rhone que nous".
 
SantiagoDR

SantiagoDR

The "REAL" SantiagoDR
Jan 12, 2006
5,814
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Putting the cart before the horse!

2hs6w53.jpg


And telling you that first would be putting Descartes before the horse.
Click to expand...
 
M

Mauricio

Gold
Nov 18, 2002
5,607
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Xavier_Onassis said:
If the person telling the story had mentioned Ren? Descartes, the author of the famous statement "Cogito, ergo sum./ Je pense, donc je suis./ I think, therefore I am." at the beginning of this tale, they would be putting (ie mentioning) Descartes before (mentioning) the horse.

The horse, upon stating "I don't think..." *poof!* vanishes before completing the statement, as he no longer thinks, and therefore no longer exists.

It is rather painful to explain jokes, but there you have it.

Deep philosophical jokes are, peut-etre, not for everyone.

You are on your own after this,
As they say in London, "pas de la Rhone que nous".
Click to expand...

I got that part (it was only 1 beer), the Descartes / the cart thing was lost on me. Thanks SantiagoDR.
 
D

Derfish

Gold
Jan 7, 2016
4,441
2
0
mobrouser said:
A horse walks into a bar.

The bartender asks "You're in here a lot, are you an alcoholic?"
The horse ponders for a moment, responds "I don't think I am" and poof he disappears.

This is where philosophy students start to snicker as they are familiar with Descartes' postulate "I think, therefore I am".
And telling you that first would be putting Descartes before the horse.
Click to expand...

SOme people think D'ors was a better philosopher that Descarte, but I put Descarte before D'ors.
 
Ecoman1949

Ecoman1949

Born to Ride.
Oct 17, 2015
2,809
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Another horse and cart joke;

A farmer is going down the road with a horse and cart loaded with horses**t. He stops to talk to a little boy. The boy asks the farmer where he is going with it. The farmer tells him he's bringing it to a friend to put on his strawberries. The boy was amazed and replies, "Really? We put cream on ours".
 
G

greydread

Platinum
Jan 3, 2007
17,477
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On Christmas morning a cop on horseback is sitting at a traffic light, and next to him is a kid on his brand new bike. The cop says to the kid, "Nice bike you got there. Did Santa bring that to you?" The kid says, "Yeah."

The cop says, "Well, next year tell Santa to put a tail-light on that bike." The cop then proceeds to issue the kid a $20.00 bicycle safety violation ticket.

The kid takes the ticket and before the cop rides off says, "By the way, that's a nice horse you got there. Did Santa bring that to you?" Humoring the kid, the cop says, "Yeah, he sure did."

The kid says, "Well, next year tell Santa to put the dick underneath the horse, instead of on top."
 
D

Derfish

Gold
Jan 7, 2016
4,441
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A termite walks into a bar and another termite is walking out, so he asks "Is the bar tender here?"
 
R

ROLLOUT

Silver
Jan 30, 2012
2,198
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greydread said:
On Christmas morning a cop on horseback is sitting at a traffic light, and next to him is a kid on his brand new bike. The cop says to the kid, "Nice bike you got there. Did Santa bring that to you?" The kid says, "Yeah."

The cop says, "Well, next year tell Santa to put a tail-light on that bike." The cop then proceeds to issue the kid a $20.00 bicycle safety violation ticket.

The kid takes the ticket and before the cop rides off says, "By the way, that's a nice horse you got there. Did Santa bring that to you?" Humoring the kid, the cop says, "Yeah, he sure did."

The kid says, "Well, next year tell Santa to put the dick underneath the horse, instead of on top."
Click to expand...
Now, THAT, was a funny horse joke.
 
Ecoman1949

Ecoman1949

Born to Ride.
Oct 17, 2015
2,809
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A horse walks into a bar and starts telling depressing stories. The bartender asks him to leave. The bartender tell him,"We don't allow neigh-sayers here".
Bada boom!
 
M

mobrouser

Bronze
Jan 1, 2002
2,345
101
63
A renowned philosopher was held in high regard by his driver, who listened in awe as his boss lectured and answered difficult questions about the nature of things and the meaning of life.

One day, the driver approached the philosopher and asked if he was willing to switch roles for just one evening. The philosopher agreed, and, for a while, the driver handled himself remarkably well.

However, when the time came for questions, someone at the back of the room asked him, "Is the epistemological ****-narrative that you seem to espouse compatible with a teleological account of the universe?"

"That's an extremely simple question," he replied. "So simple, in fact, that even my driver could answer it."





edit: Apparently meta is an offensive word. WTF?
 
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