I.r.s.

A man was called in for an audit by the IRS.

So, he asked his accountant for advice on what to wear. "Wear your worst
clothing and an old pair of shoes. Let them think you are a pauper," the
accountant replied.

Then he asked his lawyer the same question, but got the opposite
advice: "Don't let them intimidate you. Wear your best suit and an
expensive
tie."

Confused, the man went to his Rabbi who would surely know the correct
answer. He told him of the conflicting advice he had received, and asked
what he should do.

"Let me tell you a story," replied the Rabbi. "A woman, about to be
married,
asked her mother what to wear on her wedding night. Her mother advised;
wear
a heavy, long, flannel nightgown that goes right up to your neck and
wool
socks."

But when the woman asked her best friend, she got conflicting
advice: '"Wear your sexiest negligee, with a V-neck right down to your
navel."

The man did not understand: "But Rabbi, what does all this have to do
with
my problem with the IRS?"

"It doesn't matter what you wear," replied the Rabbi, "you're going to
get
screwed."