A friend sent me these, I used to think of him as one of the most
intelligent people I know.
Subject: Home Remedies!
-High blood pressure sufferers: simply cut yourself and bleed for a
while, thus reducing the pressure in your veins.
-A mouse trap, placed on top of your alarm clock, will prevent you from
rolling over and going back to sleep when you hit the snooze button.
-If you have a bad cough, take a large dose of laxatives, then you will
be afraid to cough.
-If you are choking on an ice cube, don't panic. Simply pour a cup of
boiling water down your throat and presto! The blockage will be almost
instantly removed.
-Clumsy? Avoid cutting yourself while slicing vegetables by getting
someone else to hold them while you chop away.
-Avoid arguments with the Mrs. about lifting the toilet seat by simply
peeing in the sink.
-Have a bad tooth ache? Hit your thumb with a hammer, then you will
forget about the tooth ache.
Sometimes we Just Need to Remember What The Rules of Life Really Are...
You need only two tools: WD-40 and Duct Tape. If it doesn't move and it
should, use WD-40. If it moves and shouldn't, use the duct tape.
Everyone seems normal until you get to know them.
Have a good week!
HB
intelligent people I know.
Subject: Home Remedies!
-High blood pressure sufferers: simply cut yourself and bleed for a
while, thus reducing the pressure in your veins.
-A mouse trap, placed on top of your alarm clock, will prevent you from
rolling over and going back to sleep when you hit the snooze button.
-If you have a bad cough, take a large dose of laxatives, then you will
be afraid to cough.
-If you are choking on an ice cube, don't panic. Simply pour a cup of
boiling water down your throat and presto! The blockage will be almost
instantly removed.
-Clumsy? Avoid cutting yourself while slicing vegetables by getting
someone else to hold them while you chop away.
-Avoid arguments with the Mrs. about lifting the toilet seat by simply
peeing in the sink.
-Have a bad tooth ache? Hit your thumb with a hammer, then you will
forget about the tooth ache.
Sometimes we Just Need to Remember What The Rules of Life Really Are...
You need only two tools: WD-40 and Duct Tape. If it doesn't move and it
should, use WD-40. If it moves and shouldn't, use the duct tape.
Everyone seems normal until you get to know them.
Have a good week!
HB