Funerals

J

Jostan

New member
Jun 17, 2006
98
0
0
A dominican friend of me died last week (well not really a friend, more of an aqaintance) and he was buried within 1 day. I was wondering why they do this so fast? Is it because it's so hot there, that the body decomposes too fast and that they cant afford cooling systems? If so, they wait longer with the funeral with the richer people?

Also last year, I went to a 9-day thing (dont really know how to call it, it's 9 days after the funeral and all friends and family from the person who died are coming) where does this come from originally? And why 9 days?
 
E

El Tigre

El Tigre de DR1 - Moderator
Jan 23, 2003
2,306
57
0
If the person is of low resources and can't afford a funeral home then yes. The body will start decomposing rapidly and they have to burry quickly. Normally people with low resources have the funeral in their home. I remember going to a funeral in my barrio of a little girl that was burnt beyond recognition in a fire. The stink of the decomposing body was unberable. They had a gigantic block of ice underneath the casket as they were trying to preserve it all they could while the little girl's mom arrived from Spain. They had to burry her before the mom got there.

When my Grandmother passed we had the services at a funeral home. We had her services for two days. Her body arrived embalmed from the US where we had the service for two days as well.

The 9 day "thing" is called los nueves dias or la vela. Not sure how to translate that. Heck I'm not even sure if it's only a Dominican thing. In these 9 days they pray and on the last day people go to the cemetary one last time to pay their respect. We had this for my Grandma. I remember getting into it with HR here at my company because they didn't want to extend my leave of absence for this. It would have been a disrespect to my Grandmother and my whole family if I would have left before the 9 day ritual.

Hope this answers your questions.
 
G

GringoCArlos

Retired Ussername
Jan 9, 2002
1,416
40
0
Most dominicans are buried within the first 24 hours so that the family can avoid the high cost of embalming.

There are two curious things which I have observed in the DR:

1. Most people are put in a box with a window above the person's face. I asked my wife about this, and her answer was that they sell the coffin with a window CHEAPER than a coffin without the window, so most poor people get the window. (and that seems to be a favorite of TV cameras too, on stories about a tragedy - to stick the darn camera above the window and show the dead person).

2. In the DR, the family is expected to feed anyone coming to pay their 'respects' to the dead person. This is a second tragedy to the deceased's family, as they must then get a prestamo just to buy enough food for the mooching visitors. (for the 9 day period). Having no food for visitors in this 9 day period is a great shame on the family.

In any of the other countries I have lived in, the friends of the departed's family bring food for the family and any visitors to eat, usually for several days. (where in the heck is the Cardinal to chastise dominicans on something like this, instead of any political discussions on a TV talk show?)
 
M

Mirador

On Permanent Vacation!
Apr 15, 2004
3,563
0
0
When it comes to funerals, Dominicans are still very traditional. Dominican traditional funeral practices are derived from the times when the DR was a rural society, which wasn't too long ago (about two-three generations ago). Also, DR's funeral customs were established when and where there were no modern urban amenities like professional funeral parlors, cold-rooms, etc. Due to the hot, mostly humid tropical climate, the deceased always had to be burried right away. No time for a burial ceremony. So the actual funeral ceremony was left for nine days after the death, and is called "la novena" or "el novenario". There is another institution with very remote origins, and it is the "gremio". In the countryside, every campesino belongs to a "gremio". The gremio is a funeral cooperative, where every member pays a set fee (depending on the amount of members) every death of one of the members (or family). The money goes to the deceased family to cover funeral expenses, including burial costs, and the "open-house" expenses the novena which is open to all persons without exception. Even an itenerant tourist or expat is welcome. In many places attendance to novenas represent the principal social event of the community. I belong to a "gremio" in Azua which has nearly two thousand members, so when one of us dies, we have to fork over around 50 pesos, this means that the deceased's family gets almost 100.000 pesos for burial and novena expenses.
 
D

DominicanScotty

On Vacation!
Jun 12, 2004
1,300
2
0
64
Often seen

For those that travel throughout the countryside, you might have seen them. People placing a rope across the roadway attempting to stop cars. Often this is practiced to raise money for someone in the area that is either sick or has passed away and the community attempts to raise money anyway they can. This isn't solely the reason for doing this but it is often the case.
 
D

DominicanScotty

On Vacation!
Jun 12, 2004
1,300
2
0
64
Verdad

Mirador said:
When it comes to funerals, Dominicans are still very traditional. Dominican traditional funeral practices are derived from the times when the DR was a rural society, which wasn't too long ago (about two-three generations ago). Also, DR's funeral customs were established when and where there were no modern urban amenities like professional funeral parlors, cold-rooms, etc. Due to the hot, mostly humid tropical climate, the deceased always had to be burried right away. No time for a burial ceremony. So the actual funeral ceremony was left for nine days after the death, and is called "la novena" or "el novenario". There is another institution with very remote origins, and it is the "gremio". In the countryside, every campesino belongs to a "gremio". The gremio is a funeral cooperative, where every member pays a set fee (depending on the amount of members) every death of one of the members (or family). The money goes to the deceased family to cover funeral expenses, including burial costs, and the "open-house" expenses the novena which is open to all persons without exception. Even an itenerant tourist or expat is welcome. In many places attendance to novenas represent the principal social event of the community. I belong to a "gremio" in Azua which has nearly two thousand members, so when one of us dies, we have to fork over around 50 pesos, this means that the deceased's family gets almost 100.000 pesos for burial and novena expenses.
Click to expand...

This is true and a very good point that you raised. My family in Jamao al Norte is a member of this "gremio". A Tio drowned while crossing the Rio Jamao and his burial was paid for in this manner.
 
W

wendy_s

New member
Oct 26, 2005
124
0
0
9 Days of Mourning

My fiance's grandmother passed away in early December last year in the Dominican Republic and she too was buried the day following her death. I attended the 9th day "thing". This is a custom that exists in many cultures/religions as it does with mine. We call this simply "9 days of mourning" observed through 3 days of grieving, 3 days of silence, 3 days of release. The days of grieving are a time of sharing, of crying, of memories. The days of silence are a time for contemplation, respect, and reverence. The three days of release are a time of acceptance and separation. The 9th day usually involves a gathering of family and close friends which usually involves praying. As someone already mentioned, it's the last time to pay respect to the deceased.

This is how this custom is observed in my culture. It may vary in other cultures but that's pretty much the jist of it.
 
L

LatinoRican

New member
Apr 11, 2004
211
6
0
Dominican funerals

Many Dominicans do not have the financial resources to pay the costs of a funeral home as in the USA or other countries. So, they must bury the deceased as quickly as possible for sanitary reasons. I have known of a person who died in the morning and was buried that afternoon on the same day.
The nine day "thing" mentioned as part of the mourning process is called the "novena" or "novenario." It comes from the Spanish meaning nine days. During this time, the family (usually in their home) prays the rosary for the soul of the deceased and has time to psychologically unwind and accept the fact that this person is gone. Usually, hot chocolate, coffee, crackers and other foodstuffs may be offered to those who come to pray sometimes from long distances. This custom may vary from one Latin American country to another. In Puerto Rico, this is a very common custom although some families may choose to hold the novena in a local church to avoid having all these people in their home for different reasons.
 
Last edited:
D

DominicanScotty

On Vacation!
Jun 12, 2004
1,300
2
0
64
Remembering

Also the anniversary of the death is observed by abstaining from festivities. Many Dominicans will continue to observe this for many years out of respect for the deceased. It is not unusual for a Dominican to be saddened for what seems no reason at all. They are remembering the dead.
 
M

mkohn

Bronze
Jan 1, 2002
1,151
4
0
Our first experience in the DR was to move in to our rented place, and associating with the owner's family, we noticed they were wearing white, black, or white and black.
They were in mourning, and this lasted until almost the last month we lived there.
Their dad / husband had died, and I think it had lasted 2 years.
It is called "luto."
mkohn
 
C

cuas

New member
May 29, 2006
360
10
0
Talking about "luto". My family were living in Aruba. In the sixties, no emails, no phone available, only telegrams. One came saying that an uncle passed away.
No other family members were living in Aruba but my grandmother very religious still made me wear medio luto [fabric with white and black] for three months. Medio luto because I was a child. The funny thing was we later found out, who died was a great-uncle.
 
L

LatinoRican

New member
Apr 11, 2004
211
6
0
In the old days, "luto" or mourning was observed by the wearing of black clothing by the women of the family and especially if the deceased was a close relative. After a certain time, some combination of white and black would be worn. This is called "medio luto." And finally, after about a year passed, regular street clothes (colors) would be used again. Today, many do not bother with this custom at all.
 
J

Jostan

New member
Jun 17, 2006
98
0
0
Thanks for the responses, answered most of my questions :)

When I went to the Novena, most people (not all) were dressed in only black&white too and everybody got food.
I was quite surprised actually, because everybody seemed very happy, but then at a certain time most people went into the house and they started crying, very loud, completely hysterical. For about 15 minutes and then everybody was happy again. It made me feel kind of uncomfortable, didnt really know what to do and what was expected of me.

Also I remember when the father of a friend of me died, he was not allowed to go out for a month and the wife (of the man that died) had to wear black for a year or so.
 
S

Stodgord

Bronze
Nov 19, 2004
668
14
0
When my wife's grandfather died the family only did 3 days of mourning instead of the 9 days, to save on cost and the hassle.

Beside mourning, the funeral are used for the drunk to get drunker, the comedian to make jokes and the girls to throw themselves on to the guys and for the guys to grab and fondle grieving females when they become hysterical (cuando se ponen mala).
 
M

M.A.R.

Silver
Feb 18, 2006
3,210
149
63
Mirador said:
In the countryside, every campesino belongs to a "gremio". The gremio is a funeral cooperative, where every member pays a set fee (depending on the amount of members) every death of one of the members (or family). The money goes to the deceased family to cover funeral expenses, including burial costs, and the "open-house" expenses the novena which is open to all persons without exception. Even an itenerant tourist or expat is welcome. In many places attendance to novenas represent the principal social event of the community. I belong to a "gremio" in Azua which has nearly two thousand members, so when one of us dies, we have to fork over around 50 pesos, this means that the deceased's family gets almost 100.000 pesos for burial and novena expenses.[/QUOTE]

that's a great idea, because many campesinos don't have the money for a proper funeral and since there has to be food/or refreshments for the people paying respects, for 9 days it would be a great help!!
Click to expand...
 
M

M.A.R.

Silver
Feb 18, 2006
3,210
149
63
Stodgord said:
When my wife's grandfather died the family only did 3 days of mourning instead of the 9 days, to save on cost and the hassle.

Beside mourning, the funeral are used for the drunk to get drunker, the comedian to make jokes and the girls to throw themselves on to the guys and for the guys to grab and fondle grieving females when they become hysterical (cuando se ponen mala).[/QUOTE]


You are funny. You might be right about the second part. :) In the campo where my family is from some women would become hysterical and it would take at least 5 men to hold one women down so she wouldn't fall to the floor and crack her head.
Click to expand...
 
T

twhitehead

Bronze
Nov 1, 2003
618
14
0
Mirador said:
There is another institution with very remote origins, and it is the "gremio". In the countryside, every campesino belongs to a "gremio". The gremio is a funeral cooperative, where every member pays a set fee (depending on the amount of members) every death of one of the members (or family). The money goes to the deceased family to cover funeral expenses, including burial costs, and the "open-house" expenses the novena which is open to all persons without exception. Even an itenerant tourist or expat is welcome. In many places attendance to novenas represent the principal social event of the community. I belong to a "gremio" in Azua which has nearly two thousand members, so when one of us dies, we have to fork over around 50 pesos, this means that the deceased's family gets almost 100.000 pesos for burial and novena expenses.
Click to expand...

This is origin of life insurance. Pool your money together for when it is needed. Only with life insurance companies there is a heavy profit taken off the top for adminstrating it all...tom
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Top Bottom