...it takes two to merengue!

J

JCesar

Guest
Amanda: I have no intention to make you feel bad but it looks like you need to do some soul searching.

Firstly, Newbie is right. It is kind of late into the game to start planning damage control. But anyway, if you are mature enough and sincere with yourself you will realize that in relationships the balancing act must start within us.

This is, if you "adore" that Dominicanito so much, some concessions are in order. Opposing him would only antagonize the guy even more. Contrary to popular opinion, Dominican men can be pretty accommodating with their women, as long that they don't feel that the woman is throwing a glove to their faces.

Marriage is a trying business, even if your S.O. is of the same culture, religion, country, age range, educational level, income bracket, or political affiliation.

When you go out of your immediate frame of reference you start adding potential layers of conflicts. Some times, what bring people together is what drive them apart.

It is wonderful for a Foreigner-Dominican couple to enjoy the pluses of being in wedded bliss with all the positive attributes that the other person's culture may represent.

The deal breakers are the very same cultural differences that can be downright annoying some times or most of the times.

However, the problem is compounded with the lies that we tell to ourselves. For example, you are pointing out some "cultural differences" which are "non-issues". But as long as you don't adjudicate them their real meaning (two individuals of whatever nationalities refusing to compromise for the sake of the third entity that it is the couple) you will not be able to dig yourself out of your present situation.

I have one brother and a best friend (Dominicans) that get pretty irritated with some of the Dominican things that their Dominican wives do. But they would not let go of their women for nothing in the world due to the most wonderful things that they perceive they get out of the relationship.

In conclusion, it takes two to merengue.

JCesar
 
B

Bob

Guest
I have yet to live with my Dominican wife full time, but i can already see that there will have to be many comprimises by both of us, especially in the child rearing methods. I have two boys, age 15 and 12 and she has a ten year old. I can not say that Dominican ways are better than Canadian and believe me, Canadians are not American in our culture although there are some strong and not so welcome influences. With love and strong communication and most important of all, good listening skills we will overcome all. My wife is very intelligent and well spoken, I think we can take the best of both cultures, throw the rest away and we'll both be better people for it. Some interesting opinions out there. Excellent comments LCesar and Natasha.
 
A

angela

Guest
I just have to say that I love to hear from the people that have realtionships with Dominicans, either male or female, that have good things to say! There are so many people that think so negatively, and I look forward to showing all, that my'n will also have a "happy ending"! Like any other realtionship, it takes work, but what relationship doesn't??

Thanks and I'd love to hear more happy endings!!!!

Angela