Who’s On First?, modified to fit Covid.
“You can’t come in here.”
“Why not?”
“Because you’re not vaccinated.”
“But I’m not sick.”
“It doesn’t matter.”
“Well, why does that guy get to go in?”
“Because he’s vaccinated.”
“But he’s sick!”
“It’s all right. Everyone in here is vaccinated.”
“Did you say that everyone in there is vaccinated?”
“Yes.”
“So why can’t I go in if everyone in there is vaccinated?”
“Because you’ll make them sick.”
“How will I make them sick if I’m not sick and they’re all vaccinated?”
“Because you’re not vaccinated.”
“But they’re vaccinated!”
“Yes, but they can still get sick.”
“So what does the vaccination do?!”
“It vaccinated.”
“So, vaccinated people can’t spread Covid?”
“Oh, no. They can spread Covid as easily as an unvaccinated person.”
“This is crazy!. Look, I’M NOT SICK!”
“OK.”
“And everyone in there can still get sick, even though they’re vaccinated?”
“That’s right.”
“So why can’t I go in again?”
“Because you’re unvaccinated.”
“I’m not asking who’s been vaccinated or not!”
“I’m just telling you how it is.”
“Never mind. I’ll just put on my mask.”
“That’s fine.”
“Now can I go in.”
“Absolutely not.”
“But I’m wearing a mask!”
“Doesn’t matter.”
“I was able to come in here yesterday with a mask.”
“I know.”
“So why can’t I come in here today if I’m wearing a mask? If you say ‘I’m not vaccinated’ again, I’ll break your arm.”
“Take it easy, buddy!”
“So the mask is no good anymore?”
“No. It’s still good.”
“But I can’t come in.”
“Correct.”
“Why not?”
“Because you’re unvaccinated.”
“But doesn’t the mask prevent the germs from getting out?”
“Yes, but people can still catch your germs.”
“But they’re all vaccinated!”
“Yes, but they can still get sick!”
“How?! I’m not sick!”
“But you can still get them sick.”
“So then masks don’t work.”
“Masks work quite well.”
“So how can I get vaccinated people sick, if I’m not sick and I’m wearing a mask?!”
“Third base.”
“You can’t come in here.”
“Why not?”
“Because you’re not vaccinated.”
“But I’m not sick.”
“It doesn’t matter.”
“Well, why does that guy get to go in?”
“Because he’s vaccinated.”
“But he’s sick!”
“It’s all right. Everyone in here is vaccinated.”
“Did you say that everyone in there is vaccinated?”
“Yes.”
“So why can’t I go in if everyone in there is vaccinated?”
“Because you’ll make them sick.”
“How will I make them sick if I’m not sick and they’re all vaccinated?”
“Because you’re not vaccinated.”
“But they’re vaccinated!”
“Yes, but they can still get sick.”
“So what does the vaccination do?!”
“It vaccinated.”
“So, vaccinated people can’t spread Covid?”
“Oh, no. They can spread Covid as easily as an unvaccinated person.”
“This is crazy!. Look, I’M NOT SICK!”
“OK.”
“And everyone in there can still get sick, even though they’re vaccinated?”
“That’s right.”
“So why can’t I go in again?”
“Because you’re unvaccinated.”
“I’m not asking who’s been vaccinated or not!”
“I’m just telling you how it is.”
“Never mind. I’ll just put on my mask.”
“That’s fine.”
“Now can I go in.”
“Absolutely not.”
“But I’m wearing a mask!”
“Doesn’t matter.”
“I was able to come in here yesterday with a mask.”
“I know.”
“So why can’t I come in here today if I’m wearing a mask? If you say ‘I’m not vaccinated’ again, I’ll break your arm.”
“Take it easy, buddy!”
“So the mask is no good anymore?”
“No. It’s still good.”
“But I can’t come in.”
“Correct.”
“Why not?”
“Because you’re unvaccinated.”
“But doesn’t the mask prevent the germs from getting out?”
“Yes, but people can still catch your germs.”
“But they’re all vaccinated!”
“Yes, but they can still get sick!”
“How?! I’m not sick!”
“But you can still get them sick.”
“So then masks don’t work.”
“Masks work quite well.”
“So how can I get vaccinated people sick, if I’m not sick and I’m wearing a mask?!”
“Third base.”
