Why I no longer date women in NYC.

[gatamayo]

MY DATE LAST NIGHT --- OMG GUYS READ THIS
>
>
>
>When I did my taxes this year I found out that I spent over $14,000 on
>Dates
>last year. Most of that was spent on dinner and drinks in Manhattan. Now
>don't get me wrong, I had some very good times, some great sex, some good
>conversations. Hell, I even made a good friend along the way, but mainly I
>came away from the date feeling extremely disappointed and with a lighter
>wallet. Date by date it's not THAT much money but it all adds up fast!
>
>In the past I had a habit of always grabbing the check and paying whether
>my
>date was hot or not. Whether we clicked or not. Basically I felt ashamed to
>let her pay. I also kept and interesting statistic and even I was suprised
>that only 5% of my dates even offered to pay - yes you see that right- 5%!
>One girl in the entire year offered to pay for the entire check. A very
>nice
>gesture. But of course I paid and doubt she was sincere. In light of all
>this evidence I knew I had to change some things. So, this year.....
>
>I DECIDED TO NEVER PAY FOR A FIRST DATE AGAIN. How did I do this? First I
>adopted the mindset that a girl should naturally assume she's paying for
>herself. Now this wasn't easy at first but I quickly got used to it. Then
>when going into the bar/restuarant/lounge etc. I would hand the server a
>credit card and ask them to open tabs for us. HEY!-Did you catch that? I
>said 'TABS.' Yah, don't worry at least 95% of the girls I meet miss that
>one
>too. Just to make sure I usually confirm that the server has understood me
>too. I do this when the date rudely answers her cell phone or is in the
>bathroom (probably using her cell phone). Guys, you know the Mastercard
>"priceless" series of commercials? Well, let me tell you, you won't
>understand the meaning of 'priceless' until you see one of these girls
>handed their own check for 3 20$ martinis and overpriced food (that they
>would probably never buy on their own). It's also very relaxing to
>encourage
>the girl to eat and drink up because even at 20$ a pop for exotic gooey
>blender drinks I could care less how many of them she has - cause SHE'S
>PAYING.
>
>Oddly enough when she realizes that there are individual bills there will a
>few prolonged moments of discomfort. But don't panic. Something that took
>me
>by surprise is how many girls suddenly have to 'go to an ATM'. I can't
>quite
>figure out if it's because their cc's are maxed out on shoe purchases or
>that they are trying to guilt me into paying. Well, probably a combination
>of both, but I'm remorseless after doing this for nearly 3 months now.
>Which
>brings me to my date last night...... omg.....
>
>Of course the classy nice Irish pub I suggested wasn't good enough for her.
>Nah...she needed to to go somewhere more trendy. Ok, no problem. W? Hudson?
>Meatpacking Dist? SoHo? Where we going? So she picks a midtown hotel bar.
>Nice place. Little stuffy. Drinks, not bad and Macadamia nuts on the lounge
>tables (complimentary) nice! Of course I went thru my usual routine, handed
>the server a credit card asked her if we can start tabs she said, 'sure'
>and
>took the card. 1 drink in her cell phone rang. She appoligized, (she had to
>get it). So I moved into confirmation mode. Our waitress even missed the
>'tabs' part but she adjusted on the fly and told me no problem. Boy, let me
>tell you - the girl i was with could really throw down the drinks. She was
>drinking scotch that was older than the hotel we were in. Of course I
>encouraged her the whole way. She was like, wow they have Johny Walker BLUE
>label! I was like, 'you ever try it?' She's like....'Nooooooo!!!' I'm like,
>'go on....just get some'. She's like 'are you sure'. I'm like, 'look, if
>you
>want it, just get it!' So she ordered one, then another, and finally one
>more..... wow she was probably more than a little drunk. I stuck to my
>Stoli
>and Soda, splash of Cran.
>
>When the BILL(S) came she sobered up fast. I caught a glimpse of hers, 5
>drinks plus a little finger food $319.00 I think it was. She looked shocked
>and sick to her stomache when she saw 2 bills. Guess she thought I was
>buying. Think again. (The old me woulda soaked up the bill but steared her
>away from the Blue) I had 4 drinks, no food and a great buzz. Pricey Stoli,
>but overall still a good value (i ate a ton of free macadamias and almonds)
>$36.00. Damn I thought, that BLUE label will get you every time. Of course
>she did more than the traditional fumble through her purse. Her face was
>beat red and she was speechless. She left the bill on the table and excused
>herself for the restroom. I had already paid and was sucking on some ice.
>The waitress was looking concerned. I told her, 'look'. Sure enough my date
>was heading out toward the front door. I slowly grabbed my coat as the
>waitress ran after her. Then security or a bellman grabbed her at the door
>and a small shouting match ensued. Can you imagine, she was trying to leave
>- without paying!
>
>Well, I didn't stick around to see what happened. All I saw was the poor
>waitress standing just inside the front door with a small coctail tray. She
>did look concerned but not paniced. A doorman and bell hop had the girl by
>the arm, outside and was semi-forcing her back inside, she wasn't getting
>away from this bill. I paid my bill. I had my receipt. But I couldn't help
>wondering why she ordered 3 Johnny Walker Blues, doesn't she know that ****
>is expensive? Then I wondered if they had to arrest her while I had another
>drink at my local Irish pub.
>
>I haven't heard from her again. Too bad, she was pretty cute too

 

[Hlywud]

>>>>>

cost as much >>>>>>>> as $$$$$$$$

Posts with all the > are cut and pasted from an email reply>>>>>>>

 

[AnnaC]

I'll pass this to the clown bin since it's not a true story and has no DR content in it or I missed it because I got bored after the second sentence. :tired:

 

[rellosk]

cost as much >>>>>>>> as $$$$$$$$

Posts with all the > are cut and pasted from an email reply>>>>>>>

The >'s are easily removed by first pasting the text into word (or another editor) and then using the search and replace feature in the editor (searching for > and replacing with a space or nothing). It makes it much easier to read.

 

[dawnwil]

a new song

I'll pass this to the clown bin since it's not a true story and has no DR content in it or I missed it because I got bored after the second sentence. :tired:

Hey Anna, DR content? Why it's right there, a comparison of sorts, a simile, maybe even a metaphor!

We keep hearing about the way Dominican gals order expensive seafood and fancy cocktails, really doesn't matter what it is as long as the most expensive item on the menu.

Maybe someone ought to write a blues song... JW Blues. heehee

 

[AtlantaBob]

Do you New Yorkers...

...really do that? Ask a girl out and then make her pay her own bill??? And another thing...if drinks in New York cost $20 then some one should be going to jail (its called grand theft) or someone has more money than sense. OK, maybe I'm just getting old...

 

[MerengueDutchie]

Great post!

Hahahahaha.. who said we men should pick up such outrageous tabs.. I spend what and when I like.. somtimes a MickeyD dinner and sometimes a fancy one.. if you're acting all independent but still want the expensive pampering.. fine with me but not on me.. you pick up your tab and I'll pick up mine... I've learned this lesson long ago but do it a bit differently..

Usually, I pay for the first round of drinks and then tell her its her turn only if she orders expensive drinks or food.... it manages expectations, establishes a level of normalcy and does a lot to keep a data a date and not a 'get the guy to pay for as much as he can' trip..

Now, I never hold a girl against her will and invariably some girls comment on this behaviour.. I simply tell them that if they don't like the way things are going they are free to take a walk.. some do walk..

This way I can still pay for the date (which I don't mind doing) with a serious, normal woman and loose the gold diggers fast... while having the satisfaction of seeing them loose their temper or face..

It's an easy way to separate the gold diggers from the normal women that are also out there.. both in the DR as elsewhere..

 

[Malibook]

Personally, I like to pay especially if I am the one who did the asking/inviting.

That being said, I believe that women in this day and age should be ready and willing to split the bill, and a sincere offer goes a long way.
I say split the bill because separate bills seems a bit crass and tacky to me.
I wouldn't care at all if her share was more than mine.

I never expect expenses to be split 50/50 but even just the occasional contribution by the woman is all that is required for me.

Women who just assume the man will always pay are living in the stoneage yet of course they do demand their equal, if not far superior, rights.

 

[Berzin]

Now you know...

another reason why I don't date NYC women anymore. Not that I'm cheap, but it's this obnoxious sense of entitlement that just KILLS me. I'm pretty, so men should pay for EVERYTHING. They string you along and wind up going home to their jobless fake thug/gangster boyfriends to give THEM the love that you paid for.
You know, after this story Western Union does'nt sound so bad after all...

 

[Ricardo900]

...really do that? Ask a girl out and then make her pay her own bill??? And another thing...if drinks in New York cost $20 then some one should be going to jail (its called grand theft) or someone has more money than sense. OK, maybe I'm just getting old...

New Yorkers are a true and honest bunch, but if you go to one of those fancy gold-diggers clubs, then you'll pay the cost of being the boss.

 

[NotLurking]

Good post!

Women want equality and men are giving it to them! What could be better? I guess ladies should be overjoyed about reaching their goal. Isn't equality gand? ....all it's cranked up to be?

NotLurking

 

[hollywood north]

Nice.

So all you "great" guys that resort to cheap tactics like this, obviously are attracting only losers if you've been burned so many times. Maybe you should make sure you take her to a place where she can afford to pay her own way at!!!! That way when she fdinds out waht a moron you are she can pay her share and split and never see your sorry axx again.

When you consider that a lot of us don't make as much money, you immediately put the woman in a bad situation. (I am NOT standing up for gold-digging byatches cuz I KNOW they are out there-I just happen to not be one of them).

Distrust and cheap tactics such as these reflect on the type of character YOU have.

 

[Larry]

And another thing...if drinks in New York cost $20 then some one should be going to jail (its called grand theft) or someone has more money than sense. OK, maybe I'm just getting old...

It's true Bob. Well on the outskirts of the city, way uptown Manhattan and the outer boroughs, if you are in a nice place, you can expect to pay $10 dollars for a drink. In midtown Manhattan, you can expect to pay $15 to $20. Beer is a little cheaper (not much). And for the more expensive stuff like Johnny Blue and the like...forget it.

A cup of coffee in the corner Starbucks will run you 5 or 6 dollars.

A one bedroom apartment, depending on the location in Manhattan will cost anywhere from $2,000 to $5,000 per month to rent (I am not even talking about the primo areas).

Just ask Bugsey34. She lives in Manhattan and works in the restaurant industry.

Larry

 

[xamaicano]

The only men who complain about golddiggers are the ones who want one but can't afford one. There are everywhere and they serve a purpose to the guys who can afford them. They provide uncomplicated, transactional relationships. If you can't afford them, don't date them. They aren't that hard to spot.

 

[Bugsey34]

Yes, Larry, those are the costs to be in the center of the universe.

I am a young NYC woman who goes on dates all the time and I DON'T like having the guy pay, I prefer to split. I make my own damn money and don't like the feeling of anyone paying my way, even family members or close friends.

But the Original Poster is just classless no matter if he pays or not. This guy is excited about free freaking macadamia nuts on a bar? Sorry darling but it sounds like you've been priced out of the dating game before you even started. You can barely afford to keep yourself in Stoli's! Maybe if you lose the girls you could try a Grey Goose or a Belvedere once in a while .

 

[Ricardo900]

Yep!

The only men who complain about golddiggers are the ones who want one but can't afford one. There are everywhere and they serve a purpose to the guys who can afford them. They provide uncomplicated, transactional relationships. If you can't afford them, don't date them. They aren't that hard to spot.

They hang out in top clubs in NYC, looking for NBA Players & Investment Bankers who doesn't care about the price of Johnnie Walker Blue. These diggers have a price tag on their p*ssy and if you can afford it, then so be it. Also, these diggers are Top-Notch, when it comes to looks and dress. I would not hang out in an overpriced joint, frontin to be "Big Willy". I am middle-class and hang out in a middle to upper middle class joint. $12 for a cosmos, no mas

 

[gatamayo]

Hey Bugsey34

Before you go pointing the dirty end of the stick. I'll have you know that the original post was an e-mail I received from a mass e-mail that went out in my office from an anonymous source. I believe the gentleman, guy, dude or whatever you would like to refer to him as, was simply pointing out that some of your fellow women aren't as "sophisticated" as yourself. Women in NYC for the majority are vapid, shallow and materialistic. It matters more to them that the guy they are seeing went to the right school, has the right job, the right set of friends and the fianancial statements to back it up.
Case in point, a few months ago a good friend of mine that lives in Miami and is very fianancially secure came to visit. Now the dude has all the right credentials per say, MBA from Harvard, etc etc etc. Well one night we all went out for dinner and then some drinks at a local dive bar. To make a long story short there were a group of young women that were all knockouts just standing around and chewing the fat. He was dressed in jeans a black shirt and cowboy boots. Well suffice it to say the woman he was talking to treated him like an untouchable in Moombai. Now from a scale from 1-10, my buddy is an 8-8.5. After she dismissed him I went up to her and asked why she blew my buddy off. Her response was and here is the kicker, "He's cute but he looks like he can't afford to hang with me and my girlfriends."
I immediately let out a chuckle and shook my head. She didn't like that at all.
I then proceeded to ask her what her type was, she started rattling off the some old tired crap that most honest working guys in NYC have to listen too.
I then thanked her and walked away but not before giving her a look that spoke volumes of how moronic she was. Twenty minutes later she walked by us on her way out with her gaggle of yappy friends. She then asked me what the look was all about. Well all of us regular joes immediately laughed at her and I admit it was a bit immature. We proceeded to inform her that our friend the guy she blew off, the guy who couldn't afford to hang with her was a 36 year old retired investment banker who now lives in Miami and owns homes in Aspen and Costa Rica, and has more off shore accounts than some well known drug lords. Once the laughter died down and she composed her self, she had the audacity to try and strike up a converstaion with my friend. Inviting him to hang out with her and her pals. He looked at her and proceeded to tell her what he thought of her and wished her a wonderful evening. (Ahem, ahem wink, wink)
Now that is why most guys in NYC don't bother dating women like her. It's not because we can't afford them (at least I know I can) its because we'd rather not have to play up to some bullshit criteria that these women have conjured up. I'm glad that there are independant women like yourself who don't need a man to pay for there drinks or for there dinner but occasionally we like to feel chivalrous. Now as far as the gentleman who wrote that e-mail, well lets just say that majority of men and some women in the office thought it was great. Sometimes sticking it in and breaking it off especially where it hurts is a good thing. A very good thing.

 

[hollywood north]

I know that type of woman exists in any city.

Reverse is also true-I have had too many guys go on and on about what business deals they made that were worth zillions, blah blah blah just put a deposit on a penthouse blah blah are buying a mercedes...... BFD I say.

Money disappears-character doesn't.

 

[Bugsey34]

I'm glad that there are independant women like yourself who don't need a man to pay for there drinks or for there dinner but occasionally we like to feel chivalrous.

First you complain about paying then you want to feel chivalrous. Do you want to pay or not?

You can find those people anywhere, but do us all a favor and don't generalize, take people as the individuals they are. Thanks!

 

[fundacionera]

i agree

Women want equality and men are giving it to them! What could be better? I guess ladies should be overjoyed about reaching their goal. Isn't equality gand? ....all it's cranked up to be?

NotLurking

as a female i'll do my part and offer to chip in. ofcourse im not the gold digger type...im usually happy with some chinese food or some wendy's