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Okay, it only took us two months, but we wanted to send out a huge thank you to Marco and his crew there at Rocky's for helping to make our honeymoon memorable. Not only did we get set up in some nice accomodations, but were invited to hang out with the neighbors and just have a wonderful time...

This is the story of two skunks, one named In, the other named Out. Whenever In was in, Out was out, and whenever In was out, Out was in. Well, one day, Out was in and In was out when their mother decided she needed In in. So, she sent Out out to bring In in. Less than a minute later, Out...

In light of your failure to elect a competent President of the USA and thus to govern yourselves, we hereby give notice of the revocation of your independence, effective immediately. Her Sovereign Majesty Queen Elizabeth II will resume monarchical duties over all states, commonwealths, and...

** Disclaimer - Paddy, I don't know you, but you seem to have a great sense of humor, so please take this in fun! ** Paddy showed up to work Monday morning with two black eyes. His buddy looks at him and asks, "Wow, Paddy! How did you get two black eyes?" "Well," says Paddy, "I was at...

were walking down the hall of their nursing home on day, discussing the woes of life. "I've got prostate problems," sighs one old man. "If I could just empty my bladder completely, I'd be the happiest man alive!" The next old man says, "I'm so constipated, if I could just have one full bowel...

Jesus loves you...but everyone else thinks you are an ***. Impotence...Nature's way of saying "No hard feelings." The proctologist called...they found your head. Everyone has a photographic memory...some just don't have any film. Save your breath...You'll need it to blow up your date. Your...

A businessman meets a beautiful girl and agrees to spend the night with her for $500. So they do. Before he leaves, he tells her that he does not have any cash with him, but he will have his secretary write a check and mail it to her, calling the payment "RENT FOR APARTMENT." On the way to...

A woman went to the doctor's office where she was seen by one of the younger doctors. After about four minutes in the examination room, she burst out of the examination room, screaming as she ran down the hall. An older doctor stopped her and asked what the problem was and she told him her...

Two Rednecks, Jim and George, are sitting at their favorite bar drinking beer. Jim turns to George and says, "You know, I'm tired of going through life without an education. Tomorrow I think I'll go to the community college and sign up for some classes." George thinks it's a good idea...

FEMALE PRAYER Before I lay me down to sleep, I pray for a man, who's not a creep, One who's handsome, smart and strong One who loves to listen long, One who thinks before he speaks, One who'll call, not wait for weeks. I pray he's gainfully employed, When I spend his cash, won't be annoyed...

Two tall trees, a birch and a beech, are growing in the woods. A small tree begins to grow between them, and the beech says to the birch, "Is that a son of a beech or a son of a birch?" The birch says he cannot tell. Just then a woodpecker lands on the sapling. The birch says, "Woodpecker...

A wife comes home from work one day, only to find her husband in bed with a strange woman. "That's it!" she screams at him. I'm leaving you and never coming back." The husband says, "Don't you, at least, want to hear my explanation?" She shrugs and says, "Fine, let's hear your story. But...

Last year I upgraded from Girlfriend 7.0 to Wife 1.0. I soon noticed* that the new program began unexpected child processing that took up a lot of space and valuable resources. In addition, Wife 1.0 installed itself into all other programs and now monitors all other system activity. Applications...

My fiance and I are thinking about visiting the DR the early part of May, but everything I read online or in books pretty much avoids talking about that month. I see that June through October are the rainy months and the second highest tourist season, and that November through April are the...