Looking for Love in all the wrong places?

[montreal]

I'll tell you what I see is the problem, with both men AND women in this regard-once a person gets hurt, emotions have a way getting the best of them.

I hear it all the time in different forms-a person refuses to date from the available pool where they reside for whatever reasons, usually because they got hurt once or twice by some jerk.(Maybe one should stop dating jerks? Or is that too easy?)

While they're at home they are so ultra-defensive that they won't let anyone in because they are convinced they will either get hurt again or they have convinced themselves that somehow they deserve better because there isn't anyone around them who is good enough.

So they go to a tropical paradise with their guards way down and get taken for a ride, and fall for the same lines they would never fall for at home from some person unworthy to clean their boots.

A dominican lover looking for a victim will initially make it very easy-you'll wind up thinking "Where was this person all my life?"

And then there is the inevitable "latin lover" stereotype that I hear over and over again.

Well, that is a fairy tale. And the emotional baggage you bring with you when you get on that plane stays with you, even if you don't check it in at luggage claims.

The best lovers are the ones that actually love you, not some stranger trying to use you as a means to an end.

Berzin, where have u been all my life jajaja

Excellent point in your last statement, I am in complete agreement. So much for BronxBoy's comment about us women not agreeing :cheeky:

That "Latin Lover" stereotype was invented by women who don't get out much, I can guarantee you....If you spent your whole life around "latino" guys you wouldn't want em!!!

Montreal

 

[Bellamona]

I agree with Berzin

and I'm a woman!

 

[lachicadelaplaya]

I agree too, this is what happen for a lot of woman
But not All stories are the same ...

 

[ajewellmom]

Do I look fat in this dress?

I am in Canada, and I was married to a black, third-generation Canadian who was unfaithful to me. It's not a race thing . . . . it's a relationship thing!!! I have since dated a few men and was targeted by several Dominican men. I am now dating a Latino from Costa Rica, who lives here in Canada, but not because he Latino, but because his beliefs are similar to mine, his personality meshes into my life, etc. I did meet him online as, sadly, my social life is pretty restricted due to single parent duties. We did, however, meet in person VERY soon after meeting online. I enjoyed him and certainly loved the attention when we first started dating, but I know that was not true love. We now share the type of love that knows that life isn't a piece of cake. He lives in Toronto and I'm about an hour away. We both have financial issues, we have both had the odd cold, and the minor argument/disagreement yet we have weathered these and become even closer. This is the basis for the love in our lives. It is having such a care and concern about the other person's well-being and happiness that it ranks along with or higher than your own. It's about sacrifices.

Guess it depends on what love you're looking for as to where you'll find it.