Thoughts on living in DR...

[mamajuana]

My husb is Dominican

Helen,
I know where your husb is coming from. It is hard at first for them to adjust to our country. The first few months were hard; missing his family, different lifestyle, different weather and so forth. But, after going back for vacations, he is very comfortable now in Canada. Has now been here 12 years. So, give you husband some time, he will eventually adjust.

 

[Tony C]

When I lived in the DR I married a wonderful Dominican Lady. She was not happy at the time when we moved back to Miami.
She is from a very affluent and connected family so she really wanted for nothing. When the power went out the generators kicked in without missing a beat. The maids did everything. The first day she had to do laundry she couldn't even figure out how to run a washing machine. Her family is very loving and tight knit.
We still visit the DR frequently.(4 or5 times a year) But after over 10 years back in the States she says she could never live in the DR again. Service, traffic, congestion, attitude, and the total disregard for privacy are here chief complaints.

 

[JayUKcomingtoDR]

My God!

My god u lot r giving me second thoughts. Life does sound good in Canada, alot of my friends reletives have emigrated there years ago. I can see what you are saying about the difference in standards of pay and living. Makes you think, how can the locals live there on minimum wage. But they do, and they do here too. You just keep on keeping on.
Is there a different price structure for locals and tourists?
I know when i went to bars there, they were paying less for a beer than i was. Is that how, in general it works. ? Milk the tourists? I havnt really got a problem with that persay.

 

[dulce]

Of course there is a different price structure for outsiders. Whenever I want to buy anything in the DR I send a Domincan friend and the price is cut by about 60%. Once I got established in my neighborhood I payed the same because they knew I was there for more than a week. Americans especially pay more than any other nationality because of course we are all rich! I suggest you try a short term move there before you give up all that you have. Each person has different reasons for relocating and different needs. The move may be good for you or it could drive you crazy. You are the only one to make that decision. For me it was a perfect place for me to settle for a while and do some writing. I told my mother that the fact that I was brought up in the woods of Maine for the first part of my life prepared me for living in the DR. When I returned to the USA to live I was more grateful for the everyday comforts of home. I love visiting the DR and maybe someday if the time and circumstance is right I will return to live there. At least I will not be going into it blind this time. This board would have been very helpful to me then and you are lucky to have the opportunity to learn here first. Take what information you want from the board and sort out the good and bad and make your own choice. We can see that John S. has traveled to the DR many times and he made the decision that was right for him. I think his honest comments have gotten some stimulating remarks and that is what this board is all about.

 

[Pepe]

Tony

Miami is eeeeasy. They are talking about Canada, where humans turn into popsicles by mid-November. Canada is a very beautiful, clean place, but you can only get me there around August. Those Dominicans living up there year round should be condecorated.

 

[AZB]

JohnS didn't live in DR

JohnS only stayed in DR for a few weeks in a hotel. He did whatever a foreigner does in a vacation. He went out with his girlfriend to discos, carwashes (loud music from cracked speakers) and mingled with her (Girlfriend) family in their social circle. he saw only what his girlfriend showed him and nothing more. He got advice from some people who were there for completely different reasons than what he was looking for.
wait, does he really sound like he knows what he was looking for in DR? He had my phone number in santiago and he was even invited to stay a weekend in my house to really get a taste of santiago's relaxed lifestyle; he chose not to take my offer and now claims to have seen enough of this island to paint a negative picture of this paradise.
I am glad he has realized this now than later. He didn't seem like the guy who was cut out for this place. You need money and patience (not to mention, a great deal of street knowledge) to survive here.
Remember, JohnS was never a long term resident of DR nor he has spent enough time here to make any judgement about the lifestyle of this island. He was a tourist like many who come here and have a good time with a local girl.
I guess he was looking for paris in DR.

 

[JayUKcomingtoDR]

AZB

AZB
Did you know Johns? If you didnt , i find the jesture of letting him stay with you for the weekend, extremely generous. Is that sort of thing indicitive of DR people? Do you go out of your way to try to educate foreigners / tourists about the true life in the DR. I honestly dont think people from my country, the UK, would be so accomodating.
Dulce
I hear you mate. Did you get much writing done? Was the DR an inspiration for you? So it takes a few weeks and not wearing those stupid all-inclusive bands, for the locals to take to you and know you are a tourist? Where were you situated mate?

 

[doug]

Stupid A-I bands

Jay there is nothing stupid about A-I bands, if it were not for these types of resorts the Dr would not be where it is today with the quantity of tourists. Me, myself I prefer not staying at the A-I all day, but I do stay at some A-I just because of the comfort. You are right....if you really want to "visit" the DR you must go out and about! Otherwise you are not visiting the DR, you are visiting "any" sun destination. If you stay inside the "gates" you could get this type of vacation anywhere....if you do stay inside the "gates you might not know where you are! DR,Cuba,Mexico...ect,ect, But when you venture outside of the gates....this is when you see the real DR. But that does not make the ones who wish to stay "inside" stupid.....just not as lucky as some to be able to see the real DR. Some just want a week or two of total relaxation, and some may find this at an A-I and not go anywhere except from there room to thier sun chair to the resturant and do the same each and every day(also go down with 150.00 and come back with 137.95)

 

[AZB]

JayUK...
Yes, the Dominican people are very generous and friendly. If they have a party at their home and you would like to invite a few of your friends...guess what... just bring them. They will all be welcomed like the rest. There is always room in a dominican house for you.
On the other hand, I am from Pakistan. I guess, you know about us in UK. We also tend to be hospitable.

I have been communicating with JohnS over the E mail a few times. He seemed like a down to earth guy (I still feel he is a nice guy); However, i also feel he is lost on what he really wants out of life. He wants a quick fix but he chose the wrong country for all the wrong reasons. I wish him good luck.
I am not sure if you would call me generous or a sucker but i do help people if they are serious about changing their lives for better.
I used to offer anyone to come and stay with me if they had asked for my assistance, but after having a few bad experiences, i am not so open to everyone anymore.

 

[Criss Colon]

AZB

A few more posts like these last two,and I will start to "Really" like you! It may be time for us to "Bury the Hatchet",and not in your head!Can I come to Santiago? You don,t have a "king" size bed do you? With air? Never mind,I,ll stay at the Hotel Matun! Wait a minute,"Ahem!" Hillbilly,if I remember you might have a "King" sized bed! Criss Colon

 

[JayUKcomingtoDR]

wooo! Doug

lol, easy Doug, i wasnt calling people who wear the bands "stupid". I was just implying that when i was going out of the resort wearing one , i felt a bit stupid, as if i wasnt allowed to take them off. I think the system of bands is a bit sheeplike. Especially when u leave the complex. I totally agree with every thing u say tho. I suppose there are many people who just wanna lay and chill for two weeks. But like u say, is that actually experiencing a place, its cultures, its people etc

AZB

Yeh ur right mate, Pakistani people are mostly very friendly over here, to their credit, as they do get a rough ride in some areas. When you say bad experiences, in what way mate?

 

[Hillbilly]

No but I got a Queen sized I can put up for up

Anytime you need it!!

When are you going to come up this way. What happens if i go down there?? Like maybe Friday??

HB

 

[AZB]

jayUK.... bad experiences...

Bad experiences? Hahahaha, if I tell you this, you all might lose respect for me.
Ok, I will let you know a few incidents:
1st. This one young man who simply dropped on me from Romania. At first, he had no place to go so he came directly to me for assistances. He expressed his desire to stay in Santiago because he had lived there some time back and now, willing to start all over again. He seemed like a nice kid and he was referred by a friend of mine who was out of the country (herself). I offered to let him stay a night but he insisted that he needed more time. So i let him stay a bit longer. After a day or so, i had realized that he had no money and no place else to go. Damn, this made me a bit worried as the young man had no other option than to stay with me and eat and sleep for free. He showed no desire to work and kept playing sick and weak from the illnesses. After a few more days, I was convinced that he was not going anywhere. He had no place to go and if I were to throw him out, he would have ended up in the streets.
So you see, i had a situation in my hand. My friend who had sent him to me was still out of the country and unreachable. Mind you, she was not really a friend of mine as she had unloaded her burden on me.
This boy (23+ yrs old) was doing nothing more than watching TV, eating my food and sleeping all day. Never cleaned or helped me in anything. He always played sick in the bed until it was time to eat or to go out to a bar / movies ( of course, i payed for him). After 3 weeks, I had to give him a notice to leave as I had other friends coming over from NYC to stay with me. At that point, he dug-out another friend from somewhere and moved in with her.
Later, i heard that she left him alone with the apartment and fled the country in a hurry. When he found himself left all alone to pay for the rent, he also fled the country.

Another incident was when another semi friend came to stay with me. At first, i thought he was also there for a few day, but then I was assured that he was here for a whole month, I became worried. This man only talked about living in DR but actually done nothing else but to look for hookers and sleep all day drunk. He was not allowed to bring strange women at home but i soon realized that while I was at work, so was he.... busy with hooker in the bedroom. Later I had realized that my expensive T shirts and shirts were missing. My expensive bottles of men?s colognes also turned up missing. It was later confirmed that while he fell asleep after having a good time with the girls, the hookers stole many of my personal items and simply stuffed them inside their bags and left.
I had a very harsh confrontation with the man and he was asked to leave. He never called me again.
Then there were other people who would come and only complain about DR, traffic, lack of service, electric, water etc. These same people were nothing more than just stingy or unprepared to spend the money for the comfort that they required.
Now I am a bit more smarter and more selective in my invitation to my house in Santiago.

 

[Criss Colon]

Hillbilly,We,ll just put some water in the beans!

Call anytime! 710-4370 That goes for AZB too! We,ll kick the dogs off the porch. (Don,t tell anyone,but my name is TOM,not "Criss Colon" like everyone thinks! Criss Colon

 

[El Jefe]

Doug, the stupid ones

Are the ones who stay at an A-I, maybe venture out for some trinket shopping and a bar hop, then go home and tell everyone "what the DR is like." Then either get on this or other forums and act like experts. Is all you want is to be in the sun and be waited on the A-I is fine, just don't claim to have seen the DR.

 

[JayUKcomingtoDR]

i hear u AZB

Thats bad man, they took the micky! (uk term, sorry) I think you will be choosing ur friends more carefully now! It happens tho, i can never understand people who dont realise theyve overstayed their welcome. I tell you one thing about the"hookers", they arent shy are they! I was staying in Sosua in December, and was mortified. Even if they know ur with ur girl, they still come up2 u and ask. One girl even said "i'll do the pair of you!" I went into the loo having a pee and this girl bulldozed in and well lets saying, held it for me, she was going "com on i'll suck it", and im going "hello, im still peeing!" and my girl is just out the door! amazing.
But all part of life's rich tapastry.
Well AZB, rest assured, when me and my girl do come, we'll invite YOU over to stay!

take care all

 

[AZB]

Thanks for the invitation, JayUK.
Seems like you had one hell of a time in sosua. I hope your decision to move down here is not based on your adventures in the men's bathroom. Hehehehehe

 

[dulce]

Jay
Yes I got a lot of writing done while living in the DR. I started out in an apartment in SD without a computer. Ten days after I arrived to live there Hurricane George followed me to the island. Most people would have packed up and headed home after the devastation that George created. I looked at the situation as a learning experience for me. I learned more about the loving and giving nature of the Dominican people at the most trying time for them. Everyone pulled together and helped each other to replace their losses. I wrote by hand in a notebook in my comfortable apartment in SD. It was comfortable even without lights and running water. I was writing on the difficult subject of domestic violence and would stay in my apartment alone for days just writing. Every day the family that I rented from would bring me food and water and check on me. My friends would worry when they did not see me for a few days and come and visit me to take me out and forget about my writing.
Once I got my banking established, purchased my computer and other essential needs I left SD to movenear the beach. My friends helped me find a beautiful apartment in Jaun Dolio on the beach. That is when I got serious and more inspired for writing. I not only finished my book but I also did some private writings for my friends. To get away from the depressing subject of domestic violence I wrote fantasies. Who could not be inspired for great fantasy writing with the beautiful sunrises and sunsets near the beaches of the DR?
As far as those A1 bands from the all inclusives I also found them to feel like a banner yelling out "TOURIST HERE!!!!" I stay frequently at all inclusives either with a day pass or for days at a time but I still dislike the bands. I dislike the bands because of the assumption of merchants that I am visiting the island for 1 week and then they charge more for everything. I always take the band off now when venturing outside of an all inclusive. I do not thow it away but then tie it around a chain on my neck or put it on my watch when I return. Frankly, the employees at the resorts are familar with my face and do not give me a problem with this. Usually, if the band is removed by a tourist you must pay for another.
I applaud you for taking your time and learning before you go to the DR and I wish you luck. It is my belief that everything in life happens for a purpose and your unfortunate car accident is proof of that. It is a negative experience, to say the least, but now you and your love will begin to know how to make every minute count. Moving to the DR and learning new places, people and cultures will mean ,ore to you than most. One thing not mentioned much is the number of cultures you will have the opportunity to learn in the DR. Jaun Dolio is filled with people from all over the world just like us. They are people who traveled there for vacation, fell in love with the country and the people and were excited enough to take the chance of living there. I had friends from Canada,Belguim,Italy,Germany,France,the UK,Haiti and of course Dominican Republic and the USA
Geesh Jay, you had to ask about my writing huh? It seems I have gotten carried away with it this morning writing a reply to your simple questions. I hope at least that some of the contents of my reply is useful and interesting for you and the other readers. I still tend to get passionate when writing about and promoting the DR.
PS please do not spell check this writer. When I post on this board I do not proofread nor spellcheck myself here. LOL

 

[Jim Hinsch]

Removing the AI band

I found the all-inclusive wrist band will stretch without breaking and slide on and off with hot soapy water.

 

[JayUKcomingtoDR]

AZB, El Jefe, Dulce, Jim

I just logged on again, its 2 in the morning of Saturday, just finished cleaning my bar, cashing up, and locking up. Im now tucking into a pizza. Funny, never had one in the DR, live on em here, never missed em there.
AZB.
You are a funny dude. I tell you man, i consider myself a man of the world, but when that "lady of the night" lets say, put her hands round my little fella, moving to the DR was the LAST thing on my mind! more like, jeez, if my girl walkes in now! that hooker might as well take it with her, cos it wont be any use to me after my girls finished with it!
How long have you been in the DR. Where do live now. What do you do over there mate?
El Jefe
Totally agree with u man. I dont know who is who on here yet, but I agree there must be people preaching from a small book.
Dulce
Firstly, my spelling is worse, trust me. You obviously have very strong feelings for the DR. How long have you been away? What are you doing now ,mate? What became of your writing that you did in the DR? Are you writing anything at the mo? Did you use the DR as a setting? I have written a screenplay actually, but never got to the stage of trying to sell it yet. Was there a set moment or happening when you thought, i love this place, or was it a gradual thing?
I agree with what u say about life. I really do believe a near death experience, makes you appreciate life more. It certainly should do. I am 30 now and have always , lets say, sailed close to the wind. If my mates drank 10 pints i would drink 15, if they said you cant swim accross that freezing rive, bollack naked, i would, type of thing. And i always came out smelling of roses. But the crash made me think, Jay, why dont you stop to smell the roses, see a little, do a little before you cant.
Jim
Good advice.