- Thread starter woofsback
- Start date
un-civilized?
- Status
Woolfesback, out of respect for you, I will respond, however it is not an easy question to respond to.
I assume you are referring to our posts on DR1 and the lack of decorum here. If that is what you are referring to, then I guess I agree with you.
There seems to be no common decency here, with regard to our correspondence with one another. There are those who assume they know all, and they are most adamant about explaining to us how long they have lived here and how much they know, even though they don't seem to know much.
It is people who make many assumptions, based upon very little information, who give all DR1s a bad name.
Most of us here are just muddling through, doing the best we can, with our limited abilities. Some just seem to think they are better than the rest of us, and continually attempt to prove it.
Overall, I think most posters here are down-to-earth decent people, but unfortunately, there are those who seem to be determined to give the rest of us a bad name.
I assume you are referring to our posts on DR1 and the lack of decorum here. If that is what you are referring to, then I guess I agree with you.
There seems to be no common decency here, with regard to our correspondence with one another. There are those who assume they know all, and they are most adamant about explaining to us how long they have lived here and how much they know, even though they don't seem to know much.
It is people who make many assumptions, based upon very little information, who give all DR1s a bad name.
Most of us here are just muddling through, doing the best we can, with our limited abilities. Some just seem to think they are better than the rest of us, and continually attempt to prove it.
Overall, I think most posters here are down-to-earth decent people, but unfortunately, there are those who seem to be determined to give the rest of us a bad name.
Nobody as an expat can really be an expert on the DR. You can know a lot about certain topics, business or areas of the country. As an expat you are an outsider and an observer so you see some things differently than Dominicans and I think they can learn from that. Sometimes they should be more willing to do that. But at the end of the day they are Dominicans, it is their country and they of course know more about the DR. I dont know how many Dominicans read dr1 but those who do must get a little offended with some of these socalled experts. And when they read opinions about their culture and level of education they must sometimes cringe. It is embarrasing to read sometimes.
Forum decorum....
Not disagreeing with you J.D. Salinger, but that's what makes a GREAT forum.....sometimes I think AZB is on the payroll....lol....but that's another story for another day........Don't ban me Robert, I'm JOKING...lol...:laugh::laugh:
Not disagreeing with you J.D. Salinger, but that's what makes a GREAT forum.....sometimes I think AZB is on the payroll....lol....but that's another story for another day........Don't ban me Robert, I'm JOKING...lol...:laugh::laugh:
This is the best site available to answer any question anyone can possibly have about the DR-questions such as who, what and where.
The "why" will always be subjective, and up for conjecture from all sides.
There are those who know, those who don't, and those who only think they know.
But that is why we get on the plane to visit-to find out for ourselves.
In the end, the impressions we come away with are uniquely our own, colored by our own prejudices, biases and particular states of mind.
The best way to get the most out of this forum is also the best way to contribute-state the facts as you see them and don't take the negativity (or yourself) so seriously.
If you are wrong about something, there will be someone to correct you. If you are right about something, someone will be kind enough to give you some rep points.
Those who get upset and leave over some silly disagreement are only hurting themselves. Those who stay will learn more than they ever bargained for. Those who take the judgments of others to heart I suggest have some soul searching to do.
Help out as you have been helped, never forgetting it is our love of this flawed yet incredible country that drives our contributions to the site.
And along the way, through the arguments, cat fights, and name-calling, you will find yourself cultivating some incredible friendships that will last you a lifetime. It is these friendships that make participating on this site in whatever fashion worth dealing with the occasional heated discussion.
The "why" will always be subjective, and up for conjecture from all sides.
There are those who know, those who don't, and those who only think they know.
But that is why we get on the plane to visit-to find out for ourselves.
In the end, the impressions we come away with are uniquely our own, colored by our own prejudices, biases and particular states of mind.
The best way to get the most out of this forum is also the best way to contribute-state the facts as you see them and don't take the negativity (or yourself) so seriously.
If you are wrong about something, there will be someone to correct you. If you are right about something, someone will be kind enough to give you some rep points.
Those who get upset and leave over some silly disagreement are only hurting themselves. Those who stay will learn more than they ever bargained for. Those who take the judgments of others to heart I suggest have some soul searching to do.
Help out as you have been helped, never forgetting it is our love of this flawed yet incredible country that drives our contributions to the site.
And along the way, through the arguments, cat fights, and name-calling, you will find yourself cultivating some incredible friendships that will last you a lifetime. It is these friendships that make participating on this site in whatever fashion worth dealing with the occasional heated discussion.
Last edited:
I think people mostly get offended when the shoe fits on their own foot. Who gets offended when we talk about foreigners dating chopas? Who gets offended when we talk about women dating sankies? Who gets offended when we talk about some dominicans who can't write a simple sentence? Why is it that not everyone gets offended, if its only a matter of right or wrong or truth or a lie?
So people take it personally when they see the shoe fitting on to their own foot.
Seems like we have 2 different kinds of realities , stemming from 2 different types of experiences:
One reality is widely accepted in north coast and resort areas, and then you have the folks who live in santiago and santo domingo. These 2 groups rarely agree on any issues, yet they both live in the same country. I have lived both in the resorts and the cities. I interact with poor folks and also with middle to upper class folks. I see all the people in this country so my reality of this country is also different from many.
I am writing this post because I have a feeling, people are talking about me.
AZB
So people take it personally when they see the shoe fitting on to their own foot.
Seems like we have 2 different kinds of realities , stemming from 2 different types of experiences:
One reality is widely accepted in north coast and resort areas, and then you have the folks who live in santiago and santo domingo. These 2 groups rarely agree on any issues, yet they both live in the same country. I have lived both in the resorts and the cities. I interact with poor folks and also with middle to upper class folks. I see all the people in this country so my reality of this country is also different from many.
I am writing this post because I have a feeling, people are talking about me.
AZB
DR1 is a reflection of any community, good, bad, loud, passionate, smart, stupid, people passing through, long timers, experts, young, old, ethnic diversity etc.
This mix allows it to survive and stay very active. If you sterilize or segment, it dies.
Plenty of Dominicans read DR1. DR1 is part owned and managed by a Dominican.
What do Dominicans think about DR1?
They are no different to anyone else, some content is excellent and other stuff junk food.
They take what they want, whats valuable content and disregard the BS.
I agree with John, an expat cannot be an expert on the DR, but then again, who can?
But... We have expats posting on this board who are the experts in this country in certain areas.
We have expats posting on this board that are well integrated into Dominican society, hold great jobs, running excellent businesses etc. 99% of the people that visit DR1 have no idea about some of these posters, because these people keep their lives off of DR1.
The above also goes for Dominicans. You'll be surprised if you knew who was reading DR1 on a regular basis.
This mix allows it to survive and stay very active. If you sterilize or segment, it dies.
Plenty of Dominicans read DR1. DR1 is part owned and managed by a Dominican.
What do Dominicans think about DR1?
They are no different to anyone else, some content is excellent and other stuff junk food.
They take what they want, whats valuable content and disregard the BS.
I agree with John, an expat cannot be an expert on the DR, but then again, who can?
But... We have expats posting on this board who are the experts in this country in certain areas.
We have expats posting on this board that are well integrated into Dominican society, hold great jobs, running excellent businesses etc. 99% of the people that visit DR1 have no idea about some of these posters, because these people keep their lives off of DR1.
The above also goes for Dominicans. You'll be surprised if you knew who was reading DR1 on a regular basis.
It's the same everywhere you go; if to the grocery to have some beers with friends , if to a social club or at work etc. always will find people who try to be smarter than others, I mean people that are the one that knows everything no matter they don't have an school degree but they will argue and will try to be the center of the conversation...
Same like me.:cheeky:
JJ
To a certain degree, the anonymity of message boards enables people to say things they would never dare to say to people's faces. Most of us have done it, although some much more than others. 
In general, there are certain behaviours by foreigners that Dominicans might consider rude or uncivilised. In our own countries we think nothing of walking into a waiting room, restaurant, elevator, bus etc. without meeting anyone's eye, whereas Dominicans will usually greet those present. The same way as somebody summoning a waiter by calling out PSSSSST! would be considered rude in our countries.
In both cases the hosts will understand that a newcomer is still learning the ropes - the real rudeness is when people who have been in the country for a while still ignore local conventions.
And although I wouldn't use the term "expat expert" there is certainly a lot that can be learned by an observer from outside, one who really interacts with the locals, that an insider does not register.
In general, there are certain behaviours by foreigners that Dominicans might consider rude or uncivilised. In our own countries we think nothing of walking into a waiting room, restaurant, elevator, bus etc. without meeting anyone's eye, whereas Dominicans will usually greet those present. The same way as somebody summoning a waiter by calling out PSSSSST! would be considered rude in our countries.
In both cases the hosts will understand that a newcomer is still learning the ropes - the real rudeness is when people who have been in the country for a while still ignore local conventions.
And although I wouldn't use the term "expat expert" there is certainly a lot that can be learned by an observer from outside, one who really interacts with the locals, that an insider does not register.
Some truth here.To a certain degree, the anonymity of message boards enables people to say things they would never dare to say to people's faces. Most of us have done it, although some much more than others.
In general, there are certain behaviours by foreigners that Dominicans might consider rude or uncivilised. In our own countries we think nothing of walking into a waiting room, restaurant, elevator, bus etc. without meeting anyone's eye, whereas Dominicans will usually greet those present. The same way as somebody summoning a waiter by calling out PSSSSST! would be considered rude in our countries.
In both cases the hosts will understand that a newcomer is still learning the ropes - the real rudeness is when people who have been in the country for a while still ignore local conventions.
And although I wouldn't use the term "expat expert" there is certainly a lot that can be learned by an observer from outside, one who really interacts with the locals, that an insider does not register.
I would add that:
1) Some folks have better observation and absorption skilz that others. Fact of life. Some folks just don't "see" what's in front of them and have no intellectual basis to understand what little they do see.
2) Some folks just cannot go beyond their cultural bias and just accept local idioms, religious and cultural norms.
3) Some folks come here with a "noble savage" attitude toward locals. We see it all the time, a "missionary" attitude toward Dominicans, "poor people, I feel so sorrry for them, I'll bring used clothes and trinkets in a barrel to assauge my guilt of living in the First World."
My experience is Dominicans are a LOT happier and satisfied with their lives, culture and country than outsiders think they should be...
It would be a boring and less succesful DR1 without the different personalities.
Do I like all of the characters? no
Would I take every poster's advice? hell no
Do I think the know it alls know it all? double hell no
Do I continue to learn about the DR from DR1? definately!
Do I ignore what I don't like? For sure (most of the time)
Do some posts get my dander up? once in a while
Will I continue to read DR1 every day? YUP
Will I give good advice so that others can learn? I hope so
I will try to be civilized and hope others will too.
Do I like all of the characters? no
Would I take every poster's advice? hell no
Do I think the know it alls know it all? double hell no
Do I continue to learn about the DR from DR1? definately!
Do I ignore what I don't like? For sure (most of the time)
Do some posts get my dander up? once in a while
Will I continue to read DR1 every day? YUP
Will I give good advice so that others can learn? I hope so
I will try to be civilized and hope others will too.
Thanx all!!!
i want to thank all who have posted to the thread
i must admit i am surprised to see some of these posts being so intelligent and understanding.....i expected a free for all
i just get tired of the bickering, hollier than thou, i'm right and you don't know anything attitudes...the racism and the knocking down of people who aren't as fortunate as us...
and yes...i always fought the school bully
old habits are hard to get rid of.....and i'm gettin older by the day...lol
the dr1 is an awesome site...
it has more info than i will ever use..nice to be able to at any time
i want to thank all who have posted to the thread
i must admit i am surprised to see some of these posts being so intelligent and understanding.....i expected a free for all
i just get tired of the bickering, hollier than thou, i'm right and you don't know anything attitudes...the racism and the knocking down of people who aren't as fortunate as us...
and yes...i always fought the school bully
old habits are hard to get rid of.....and i'm gettin older by the day
...lolthe dr1 is an awesome site...
it has more info than i will ever use..nice to be able to at any time
Hahahah, I am also surprised to see how many people know me from dr1. Of course there are people who can't stand me but it seem, many do relate to my experiences and agree with me. Only the people who have limited contact with DR culture think I am full of crap, but after you live here for many years and work in real jobs that require personal interaction with all sorts of locals, then and only then you begin to see the full picture. For now, many in the resort areas think I am full of it, arrogant and treat locals bad. But in reality, I probably do more for the the people here than even they do.
AZB
I am sure wolfpack has good intentions for this country and he seems like a good person. If there are questions that you feel like asking but afraid to ask in the forum, feel free to PM (personal message) me or anyone else you feel capable of answering. many people are here to help anyone who cares to ask. You don't have to take the advice if you don't feel its right for you, but at least it may present a different point of view to think about.
AZB
AZB
actually, this thread wasn't to pick on any one person
everyone has a different opinion
the difference of civilized and un-civilized is different to many people
i was hoping to get it down to a common ground for all to accept or at
least understand
if a person is in belief one way and another states contrary to it..
misunderstandings occur and all hell breaks loose
i have learned more about the dr from here than anywhere...
and i have much more to learn
it's good to have a variety of teachers
everyone has a different opinion
the difference of civilized and un-civilized is different to many people
i was hoping to get it down to a common ground for all to accept or at
least understand
if a person is in belief one way and another states contrary to it..
misunderstandings occur and all hell breaks loose
i have learned more about the dr from here than anywhere...
and i have much more to learn
it's good to have a variety of teachers
I personally learned a lot from this forum and that is why I am still here. People on this board come from such a vast variety of cultures and backgrounds - you don't even have to travel somewhere to understand how people from another culture think. I also read other multicultural message boards to learn about Arabic, Indian and other cultures and understand people I socialize and work with. But DR1 seems to be one of the most interesting for me with all the shocking content sometimes.
Last edited:
- Status