Teaching our toddlers both languages

[Anastacio]

I am becoming slightly concerned about the confusion we are inflicting on our daughter by speaking both languages (English/Spanish) at our will and with no routine or obvious development plan. I have been told just to carry on doing what we are doing, but I'm not happy with the situation as I can't see how she is picking up a definition or divide.
She gets Spanish from everyone and English from me, her mother plays along also but her pronunciation is terrible. I do speak in Spanish when we are in company to the best of my ability, and I slip into English when I think it suitable. I have bought loads of early learning books in English and so she is learning association well.
Main concern is I'm noticing a confusion when we are using both English and Spanish for a certain thing and she is uncertain what is correct, two names for one object.
How have others gone about this, I need to do something but she is a bit young for class, but old enough to progress with confusion.

 

[MaineGirl]

Can you label things in your house with both languages...teach everyone something.

I am sure many multilingual families will tell you they just get it from you without much effort, and expose to both as much as possible. So many youtube videos in English for prek kids, in Spanish too. Skype people at home in English and let her participate.

Some ideas. Good luck. She will be better for being bilingual.

 

[Gemcee]

this is prime time for your kids to learn languages... children who start earlier often have better accents than those who start later as they build the ability to perceive and discriminate between sounds. As an ECE (and an adult who struggled to learn a second language)I can't stress enough the importance of bilingualism..our children learn both French and English here in Canada. How old are your children? If you instill both languages now..you are setting them up for success in the future. Kids are smarter than you think...you may feel confused but I am sure your kids are smart cookies.

labeling items is such a great idea...Dora the Explorer is a great learning tool also because it's geared for toddler/pre school...repetition in both languages and simple explanations of definitions is also necessary.

 

[Chip]

From my experience as a father of three girls with a Dominican wife and also having discussed this topic with hispanic couples in Orlando my opinion is that speaking both languages to your child in the beginning may or not may be beneficial.

However, it appears the opinion among psychologists specializing in language (in Orlando and here in the DR) is that all kids should be able to handle both languages in their formative years and those that can't are considered to have a learning disability; as was "apparently" the case with my daughter.

Nonetheless, at least in the case of my daughter we pulled her out of a bilingual program after three years (that she started when she was 4) and very little and disappointing progress and focused on Spanish only and she immediately started having amazing results in Spanish comprehension and even started reading. She is currently 10 and does very well in Spanish. The colegio where she goes has an ok program in English (one class everyday) but I'm not too concerned she won't learn English as we will have her in an institute in a couple of years. My own desires for her are to be sufficiently fluent in English to work in the States and to be able to communicate with my family so I believe as long as she gets in a good program by the hs years she will do fine.

I think there is also something to be said for taking into accounts your kids personality; which apparently the psychologists could give a rats a$$ about. In my daughters case she is very shy and timid lo and behold just like both her parents when we were young. Because of this in our early years me and my wife both struggled in grade school. In my own case I had poor grades in English comprehension well into hs while in the other classes I got better. Also, in spite of my apparent "language comprehension" disability I think I have done quite fine learning Spanish at the ripe old age of 34 years old but according to some (like Don Don) my English sux, oh well.

In summary, I think you should take into account your child's progress and personality in determining if they should be able to handle both languages. If you deem your child to be somewhat shy I wouldn't be afraid to limit speaking to them in Spanish as at some point shyness can be grown out of. Also, a child's confidence is closely tied to their self esteem and I'm all for making changes in parenting to make sure my kids aren't suffering in this regard. Hope this helps.

 

[DMV123]

Here is how the "experts" say to do it from birth:

The native spanish speaker should speak with the child in Spanish ONLY..

The native English (or whatever language you are teaching) should speak with the child in English ONLY.

What the parents speak with each other and with outsiders is irrelevant.

The child will learn native Spanish from one and native English from the other. It will just happen.

Later on all the educational issues will come in but from birth they say this is how to handle it.

*** I don't claim to have done this or BE the expert, just passing it on. ***

 

[MaineGirl]

In summary, I think you should take into account your child's progress and personality in determining if they should be able to handle both languages. If you deem your child to be somewhat shy I wouldn't be afraid to limit speaking to them in Spanish as at some point shyness can be grown out of. Also, a child's confidence is closely tied to their self esteem and I'm all for making changes in parenting to make sure my kids aren't suffering in this regard. Hope this helps.

At the toddler stage, they are able to acquire both languages naturally--I am very confused by your last statements and I am hoping you can clarify them.

Why would limiting the child to speaking only Spanish relate to outgrowing shyness?

How will both parents using the two languages relate to confidence and self esteem?

Feel like I am missing something here, and maybe it is right in front of me and I am just not getting it...

Babies/toddlers are prime candidates for becoming fluent in many languages without much "work" involved nor negative impact on self-esteem...IMHO

 

[SKing]

Also with my kids, I said things in both languages. It gets a little annoying at times but they get it.
Example: "Quieres jugo? Do you want juice?"

SHALENA

 

[Anastacio]

She certainly has no problems in confidence, she is anything but shy, infact a bit of a show off. Being my one and only I am learning the correct things to do also. I just need her to have the best education I can give her in the country and any headstart is a good thing. Last thing I want to do is confuse a natural progression by overloading her capacity for absorbing information.
But the contradicting info and advice surrounding this subject is confusing to me. Leaving me thinking it is an area for me to judge on, and if I'm noticing slight confusion maybe it is up to me to do something to correct things.
It's difficult, I've read loads on the subject and opinions are opposite ends of the mark, not much of a help other than to add fuel to the confusion, lol.

 

[MaineGirl]

Last thing I want to do is confuse a natural progression by overloading her capacity for absorbing information.

I don't think this is possible. It's a natural process for her right now. It's your window of opportunity! Heck, she could acquire Mandarin if she was engaged with that language right now too.

Expose to good speakers of both languages as much as possible, she'll be fine!

 

[Chip]

At the toddler stage, they are able to acquire both languages naturally--I am very confused by your last statements and I am hoping you can clarify them.

I can see from the bolded above that you believe this to be the case. My personal experience is different.

Why would limiting the child to speaking only Spanish relate to outgrowing shyness?

In my daughters case she was almost 8 and could not speak English and her Spanish speaking was very weak and she could not read. If you are a parent you should understand what that could do to a child's psyche in school and among her playmates. After we made the change our daughter is much more extroverted and within a year or two began to answer the teacher when called upon in her class.

 

[sangria]

Here is how the "experts" say to do it from birth:

The native spanish speaker should speak with the child in Spanish ONLY..

The native English (or whatever language you are teaching) should speak with the child in English ONLY.

What the parents speak with each other and with outsiders is irrelevant.

The child will learn native Spanish from one and native English from the other. It will just happen.

Later on all the educational issues will come in but from birth they say this is how to handle it.

*** I don't claim to have done this or BE the expert, just passing it on. ***

This is the way we have approached it.

I speak only English & my husband only speaks Spanish.

If he asks her a question in Spanish, many times she will answer in English and he will repeat and repeat until she responds in Spanish.

There is definitely a lot of mixed sentences and she has her preferences in her vocabulary which is very cute right now.

For example, "I'm tired mama, I want to go to the cama". "Papi, yo quiero applesauce".

We aren't worried about bad habits or the mixed language. She is just over 2 and doing very well. She knows the difference between the languages, she knows who speaks what, she can count in both languages. When we came to the DR earlier this month she knew right away to talk to abuelo and abuela in Spanish. I read her english books, my husband reads her spanish books and we also have some dr. suess that are bilingual and have both languages on each page.

One of my family members is an ESL Specialist and part of the Newcomer Settlement program to help new residents in Canada settle into schools. She has a lot of experience in this area and her opinion is to continue following this method.

One thing we were told is that consistency is the key. If you each stick to your native language when talking to the kids they will not get confused.

They advise not to speak the other language as you may be teaching your child bad habits.

 

[Chip]

I'm glad that other parents have been successful speaking both languages to their young children but would caution other parents to don't be afraid to change this approach if you child is not making the progress they should. This is what we did after having little results after almost 7 years of trying with our oldest daughter (since she was 1 year old).

 

[MaineGirl]

I'm glad that other parents have been successful speaking both languages to their young children but would caution other parents to don't be afraid to change this approach if you child is not making the progress they should. This is what we did after having little results after almost 7 years of trying with our oldest daughter (since she was 1 year old).

Chip I think this makes good sense and I understand better now what you are saying. Parents should not choose things always based on what other people tell them but use instinct as to what will work for their unique child.

I do happen to believe what I do based on experiences with friends and family. Unfortunately in the case of my niece and nephew their mom (argentine) uses more English than Spanish at this point so they are losing their skills.

I am not a parent, and am clueless as to the strong emotional impact seeing your child suffer has on a parent. But I applaud you for saying don't be afraid to change your approach.

 

[cuas]

I came to the USA with a 4 years old daughter who only spoke Spanish. She was in school in the RD and in the US we were staying with family members who only spoke Spanish.
I registered her in Kindergarten in English only. The first day of school I had to stay. The teacher asked the children "Show me your mouth" All of them except my daughter showed the teacher their mouth and so on and I was whispering to my daughter touch your mouth, touch you ears. I felt guilty. The assistant teacher was Puerto Rican and she was my daughter's interpreter. She told her how to say "I need to go to the bathroom." My daughter said she missed all the children's stories because she could no understand English.
When she learned English she wanted to speak to me in English and I refused becuase she has to speak Spanish.
On the other hand I had twins born in US. They had speech delay. They were getting speech therapy in Spanish and one day I met the therapist I could not understand her Spanish. I demanded for my children to be in an English only class. Their father only speaks English. Now my twins are 18 an do not speak Spanish. I feel guilty that I made a bad decision because when we get together they are the only ones that do not speak Spanish and they tell me that because of me they do not speak Spanish. I paid my brother to teach them Spanish but are not cooperating. It seems that they think that I neglected them when they were little. Both are in college and I keep telling them to take Spanish classes. I feel very bad when every body is laughing and they do not understand a hint.

 

[Anastacio]

Sangria,
It looks like you are just ahead of us, our little girl isn't yet 2, but your description sounds like what I am expecting. The crossover without intention. Maybe I freaked out a bit about the thought of this and should just be happt she is good at association and is stringing basics together, even if it is a mixed bag. I like the idea of me only in English as I have had concerns of her picking up my bad habits.
Good feedback all.

 

[granca]

Our daughter is now 4 1/2. I speak to her nearly all the time in English, her Mother in Spanish. I will sometimes repeat a command or question in Spanish to get a quicker reaction like " shut up & calla te ". I also speak spanish when in mixed company or talking to her Mother. She has learned some songs in english and actually counts better in English, I've promised her a watch as soon as she knows her numbers well enough. Most of the time she answers me in spanish but sometimes in English. She is very useful at passing her Mother messages, i tell her in english and she tells her Mother in spanish, not always word for word but the sense is always there. Some words she learned in english take precedence over the spanish one. The moon is only ever la luna when she's talking with someone who says they don't understand. Lately she has started correcting her Mother's english and pronunciation. Yes I read various books about it and decided that it appeared to me that the way we're doing is the most natural. i get called Daddy in english and Papi in spanish. I also pretend (sometimes no pretence!) that I've forgotten a word in spanish and ask her if she knows. Don't despair other parents, speaking and reading naturally in your own mother tongue I honestly believe does the trick. It does have its problems however when she comes home from school some times all teary because the teacher has told her to shut up and give the other kids a chance during english lessons. If anyone (an expert) finds faults with my actions, do please say. No offence taken.

 

[YUL514]

I agree with DMV123 and Sangria.My wife and I spoked both languages to our kids from birth.Living in Montreal,Canada,it was important to me that my kids be fluent in both English and French.Each parent should stick to the language he or she knows best and speak to the kids only in this language so there is no confusion.
Our kids were five years old before they realised that some people could only speak one language and others were bilingual such as their favorite cartoons that were on both English and French TV.
Today they are adults and they still switch from one language to the other when talking to their mother or me.
IMHO this is the best gift you can offer to your kids.For someone living in the DR,you have to speak Spanish but it is a great advantage to also speak English.

Mike

 

[Chirimoya]

Anastacio, you're getting some solid advice here.

My son's case is English-speaking mother, Spanish-speaking father, Spanish-speaking environment. If the mother is the primary carer, as I was, her linguistic influence will have the edge, but in my son's case this was counterbalanced by the influence of the wider Spanish-speaking environment. That was addressed by spending summers with my family, in a mainly English-speaking environment. Our son (10) is about as bilingual as you can get.

The confusion, if any, is likely to sort itself out. There are books like The Bilingual Family which have some helpful tips but I think the main thing is to follow your instincts.

Amazon.com: The Bilingual Family: A Handbook for Parents (9780521004640): Edith Harding-Esch, Philip Riley: Books

And the Multilingual Living Network has some interesting articles, case studies, forums: Multilingual Living

I'll send this link to Pib so she can tell us about her daughter's tri-lingualism!

 

[Norma Rosa]

I am becoming slightly concerned about the confusion we are inflicting on our daughter by speaking both languages (English/Spanish) at our will and with no routine or obvious development plan. I have been told just to carry on doing what we are doing, but I'm not happy with the situation as I can't see how she is picking up a definition or divide.
.

Never underestimate the power of the brain. You have been given good advice; be consistent and natural, but don't push. The child will be able to separate both languages. People who are multilingual (not just bilingual) were exposed, at an early age, to different languages. Europe and Africa are regions with a myriad of multilingual individuals.

Here is a very interesting article.

Ask A Linguist FAQ: Bilingual and Multilingual Children

 

[Norma Rosa]

I never thought of it this way, but when we teach babies different languages, we are actually building their brains.

http://www.fcs.uga.edu/pubs/PDF/FACS01-6.pdf