Average ages of married couples in DR

[msbanker]

I am wondering if anyone can tell me where to find actual fact data that discusses the average age of married couples. More specifically...what are the stats on Dominican men marrying a woman who is older than he is.

My husband is Dominican and we are working on bringing him to my country. We were turned down for the sole reason that he is 10 years younger than I am and that is not common in the Dominican so the immigration board feels that our marriage is not valid.

We have an appeal hearing coming up at the beginning of July and it would be fantastic if I could provide some documented data on this subject that would support our side of the argument.

Any ideas or thoughts on this would be appreciated.

 

[Chirimoya]

Oficina Nacional de Estad?stica (ONE) :: Welcome

National Statistics Office website is an excellent resource. It probably has data on average age of individuals at marriage, but is less likely to have stats on age differences between partners.

 

[Lando calrisian]

If he is heading to the USA that will certainly raise they're eye-brows. I worked as an interpreter in immigration hearings and they we're very sceptical of marriages where the man is younger than the woman.

Good luck!

 

[DMV123]

It also sounds like this may be the convenient "excuse" to turn you down.

From what I have seen - it is NOT common for men to marry older women here - unless they are marrying a foreigner!!!!

 

[donP]

Will she learn?

__ not common in the Dominican so the__
We have an appeal hearing coming up at the beginning of July and

by then you ought to know the name of your husband's home country.

donP

 

[baby bori]

I am wondering if anyone can tell me where to find actual fact data that discusses the average age of married couples. More specifically...what are the stats on Dominican men marrying a woman who is older than he is.

My husband is Dominican and we are working on bringing him to my country. We were turned down for the sole reason that he is 10 years younger than I am and that is not common in the Dominican so the immigration board feels that our marriage is not valid.

We have an appeal hearing coming up at the beginning of July and it would be fantastic if I could provide some documented data on this subject that would support our side of the argument.

Any ideas or thoughts on this would be appreciated.

msbanker really is there that much of a shortage of me in your country to being thorugh all this hassle??? the man is 10 yrs younger than you can't you find a well established economically stable man(hard wordking at least) in your country than be going through all that??? in your country try online dating or the personal classified section of your local newspaper or talk to friends and family tell them you are looking for a good responsable hardworking stable man they might spread the word around about you!!!!

 

[baby bori]

msbanker you have a dominican sankie in your hands!!!! a smooth talking mostly college or technical school uneducated dominican guy telling you sweet things and professing some type of bogus loyalty to you and in turn you love him and probably send him money for rent, food, and drinking expenses while you work hard in your country it sounds all too familiar!!! try finding your mate in your country go out more spread the word around that you would like to find a good man for a potential long term steady relationship!!! this guy in the DR will just want to leach off you when he comes in your country start finding new friends and hanging out then when his paperwork is straight in your country will step off!!!

 

[donP]

Please do take him to Canada.

msbanker you have a dominican sankie in your hands!!!!

Not necessarily.
Mrs. Banker (or whatever name she may now carry) "has been with" her husband since late 2006 (at least this is what she told us then).

We do not know why she abondoned her initial plan to come and live here.
But now we ought to help her to take her husband to Canada to live there happily ever after. :bunny:

BTW, Anna will soon tell you all that this is the LEGAL forum.... :bunny:


donP

 

[Africaida]

Ms banker, I agree with Chirimoya,I work in stats and ,honestly, I have never ever seen stats on age differences between partners for any country.
Personally,I have yet to know any culture too where it is common occurrence for women to be older (I could be wrong).

 

[Matilda]

There is actually a wealth of data on this on the internet.

Here is just one:

http://www.statistics.gov.uk/articles/population_trends/PT132AgeDifferencesArticle.pdf

This relates to the UK - personally I doubt the figures exist for the DR, with the level of marriage being lower.

If you read all of the articles, the general consensus appears to be that the days when older men married younger women - often for fertility reasons - have changed somewhat, and now it is more acceptable for older women to marry younger men. However, most articles do say that often women who marry foreign husbands are older than their spouses.

Do a thorough Google search - but I am afraid you are unlikely to find that it is as common as you would like it to be.

All you need to do, however, is tell them the truth. Men reach their sexual peak at 17 and it is downhill from there. Women at 32. Enough said. Both of my husbands were/ are younger than me!!!

matilda

 

[DMV123]

Matilda - you put a smile on my face!!!!

 

[donP]

There are stats about everything.

I work in stats and ,honestly, I have never ever seen stats on age differences between partners for any country.

A shame really.
This is an abstract of one of the many studies.

"We speculate that four broad societal changes (postponement of marriage by large numbers of women, dispersion of divorce throughout the life cycle, more equitable distribution of power between men and women, and wide swings in fertility) should eventually affect male-female age difference at marriage—i.e., the age-mating gradient. Examination of age difference at marriage from 1930–1980 in a central Florida county shows a trend toward increasing percentages of women marrying men younger than themselves. Data on all marriages for 1985 for this same county (N= 7,021) indicates a continuation of this trend. Previous investigation of the age-mating gradient disclosed that age at marriage and marriage parity are related to the percentage of marriages in which the age-mating gradient is "followed.' Using the proportion marrying mates older or younger by three or more years as a conservative measure of the violation of the age-mating gradient, we find that the persons most likely to deviate from the traditional age-mating gradient were men ages 24–29, women over 30, and those persons who were marrying for the second, third, or later time. Some suggested explanations for these patterns are offered."




donP

 

[greydread]

Hahaha! ROTF...

All you need to do, however, is tell them the truth. Men reach their sexual peak at 17 and it is downhill from there. Women at 32. Enough said. Both of my husbands were/ are younger than me!!!

matilda

Hahaha!

A Man's libido peaks at seventeen. We don't peak sexually until much later. At 55, I'm not as good as I once was but I'm better once than I ever was.

Back to the original post, It's difficult to believe that the age difference was the only reason for denial. These reviewers are not allowed to make gender based judgements, allowing Men to sponsor Women half their ages and not allowing the same for Women. I didn't catch what Country he's trying to emigrate to but that would be an item for appeal (and a bite out of somebody's backside) in the US.

 

[DMV123]

It's difficult to believe that the age difference was the only reason for denial. These reviewers are not allowed to make gender based judgements, allowing Men to sponsor Women half their ages and not allowing the same for Women.

Bull - they can make value judgements that serve as rejections on pretty much anything they want!

BUT I agree - I do not think it was the age. I think they smelled a sankie.

 

[sangria]

They can't deny for age gap alone.

It is usally one of the reasons given along with others which, when combined place doubt on your relationship and go towards proving that your spouse entered into your marriage for the sole purpose of immigrating to Canada and not based on a genuine relationship of love, commitment etc.

If your spouse was told this during an interview you may want to research some of the visa threads and the interviewers name as you aren't the first to have been told by the interviewer that older woman/younger man relationships aren't common in the DR and may have grounds to fight your case based on the interviewers bias and pre-judgement of your relationship. Their job is to determine if you are a legitimate couple...not to decide if older woman are allowed to marry younger men.

You may also want to read through the procedure manual for processing overseas applications for PR to Canada. It is cut & dry how they process your file and when they are to approve the visa without interview and what would consitute an interview requirement/denial.

To help gather stats, I might suggest asking some members of the dominicano spouses group on facebook. You will find some good couples that have been successful in getting PR status in Canada.

 

[Kozy]

Good luck msbanker. I believe Sangria's advice to be correct. My buddy, from the USA, and his dominican wife 20+ years younger than him also received the same skeptical treatment. In the end the wife received her visa. Why- because they had clearly documented a long history together in the DR.
My co- worker is from Wales and her Dominican husband is 16 years younger than her. They have been married 12 years and are doing fine. Unusual yes, acceptable here in the DR- absolutely.
Years ago I had a girlfriend in Loma de Cabrera. We were together 4 years. I was 24 years older than her. I will always remember the first time I met her parents. Dad was 29 years older than mom; Mom was the ex-amante who eventually won out over the wife. They had 6 kids. Sometimes recently arrived foreigners don't quite understand that age difference in couples here in the DR is no biggie. Social class, family and color are the dominant factors in mate selection. Another option is--just live in the DR ! K

 

[DMV123]

Kozy you make good points.

You are correct that often we see older men and younger women. BUT you do NOT often find older women younger men amongst Dominicans!!!

You do see it in expats, but NOT locals - at least not often!!!!

 

[msbanker]

Yes we have been together since early 2005 and married in 2006. I was moving there but then my mother got very sick and I wanted to be here for her. I don't send him money, he has a job and works full time year round.

I have numerous friends who have spouses much older than them so this type of a relationship is not uncommon for me. For those who try to berate me or lecture me about finding a man in my own country...I feel bad that you are so jaded in life.

I came on this site for some legal ideas/help in this matter not for advice on my personal affairs and choices. Bad things happen to good people all of the time and it isn't specific to long distance relationships...if my eyes are wide open what business is it of anyone..be they friend, foe or government?

 

[Shiraz72]

Yes we have been together since early 2005 and married in 2006. I was moving there but then my mother got very sick and I wanted to be here for her. I don't send him money, he has a job and works full time year round.

I have numerous friends who have spouses much older than them so this type of a relationship is not uncommon for me. For those who try to berate me or lecture me about finding a man in my own country...I feel bad that you are so jaded in life.

I came on this site for some legal ideas/help in this matter not for advice on my personal affairs and choices. Bad things happen to good people all of the time and it isn't specific to long distance relationships...if my eyes are wide open what business is it of anyone..be they friend, foe or government?

Hi MsBanker, I'm curious as to whether or not the age difference in their eyes also has anything to do with what age bracket you fall into? I've dated both younger and older men. I'm in my 30's and my boyfriend is in his late 20's, so I'm older than him but we have common interests and when seen together, we don't appear out of place (nobody can ever guess my true age and my daughters and I are always mistaken for sisters). My previous boyfriend was older than me and I found the age difference became a problem when our interests changed because I was just hitting my 30's and he was reaching 50. He was asked several times if I was his daughter when we were together. There is a double standard in society that it's more acceptable for older men to be with much younger women but it's frowned upon when it's the other way around. But what can we do? That's just the way it is.

 

[dalila05]

Hi MsBanker, I'm curious as to whether or not the age difference in their eyes also has anything to do with what age bracket you fall into? I've dated both younger and older men. I'm in my 30's and my boyfriend is in his late 20's, so I'm older than him but we have common interests and when seen together, we don't appear out of place (nobody can ever guess my true age and my daughters and I are always mistaken for sisters). My previous boyfriend was older than me and I found the age difference became a problem when our interests changed because I was just hitting my 30's and he was reaching 50. He was asked several times if I was his daughter when we were together. There is a double standard in society that it's more acceptable for older men to be with much younger women but it's frowned upon when it's the other way around. But what can we do? That's just the way it is.

things are changing a lot around me,a lots of my friends are dating younger mens and none of them from DR.but honestly being older than my husband i get a lot of griefs,thanks god it's not physically obvious .
also being previously married to someone older i do enjoy the other way around.mens can get fresh meat so do we,lol.