S
sokitoumi
Guest
you could go to theforceinme's little get together in mi tavera (I dont know how to do the link to his thread)- I beleive hes a nice man even if he does think im a woman in the chatroom
- Thread starter creativeliza
- Start date
Become isolated and need to connect
You mean your not a woman?!?! What was all that talk about make-up, stockings and breastfeeding? Quite frankly i feel violated, dirty and used lol
now she knows she better doesn't look for friends in the chat room or at 'typical expats' places, lol
Mike
Mike
I'm also in Santo D - have been here for a year but haven't met many ex-pats except those I see occasionally at the library (and those of you I met at the DR1 Christmas party). I hang out with my room-mates and their co-workers but would love to meet other professional women as well. I'm currently working from home and sometimes don't leave the house for days - sad, but true. There is a good chance my neighbors think I am the live-in housekeeper here as they only see me taking out the trash and buying fruit! haha...
If you are interested in getting together, coffee, fria, please let me know. Take care..
If you are interested in getting together, coffee, fria, please let me know. Take care..
Excuse me for butting in.
I'm a young woman with zero experience in the men department and perhaps some of you can enlighten me on the rules of dating-while-you're-still-married game. It seems to me that you must first make sure you won't aggravate your situation further by wanting to (however innocent) establish lazos with people whom other's in the family may consider to be a thread to the family's constitution.
I don't pretend to know what the "rules of engagement" are in the DR, but my parents tought me, and common sense confirms in me, albeit my limited experience, that you finish off a relationship before starting another.
Again, I don't mean to come on as a "party pooper" or "una fresca ignorante", but it just seems to be one of those situations that call for a lot of tact and consideration for your still-married-to-you-husband, before venturing into making outside friends. Please don't hate me for speaking my mind. I'm a total prude and see things from different angles. Peace and happiness to you.
I'm a young woman with zero experience in the men department and perhaps some of you can enlighten me on the rules of dating-while-you're-still-married game. It seems to me that you must first make sure you won't aggravate your situation further by wanting to (however innocent) establish lazos with people whom other's in the family may consider to be a thread to the family's constitution.
I don't pretend to know what the "rules of engagement" are in the DR, but my parents tought me, and common sense confirms in me, albeit my limited experience, that you finish off a relationship before starting another.
Again, I don't mean to come on as a "party pooper" or "una fresca ignorante", but it just seems to be one of those situations that call for a lot of tact and consideration for your still-married-to-you-husband, before venturing into making outside friends. Please don't hate me for speaking my mind. I'm a total prude and see things from different angles. Peace and happiness to you.
Colombiana
While I do agree with your general idea, as far as I can see there are is nothing in the OP indicating that she wants to date men for romantic encounters. Her subsequent post's also reflect the same. Now if there is an ulterior motive then I missed it.
Creativeliza,
Good for you making the step to connect with people here. I know that I don't post much but I too am American and have been here for 4 years. I'm in Bavaro and good friends with Laura (hey girl!) and if you are ever in the area please let us know and we can all get together. Sorry to hear about your separation but I can completely identify with the isolation at times. Now don't jump down my throat guys but I understand what you mean also about hanging out at places other than bars. Don't get me wrong, bars are fine but being from NY, I'm more of a cafe type of girl, myself.
Laura when the hell are you moving closer to me so I don't isolate?!?!?!
Good for you making the step to connect with people here. I know that I don't post much but I too am American and have been here for 4 years. I'm in Bavaro and good friends with Laura (hey girl!) and if you are ever in the area please let us know and we can all get together. Sorry to hear about your separation but I can completely identify with the isolation at times. Now don't jump down my throat guys but I understand what you mean also about hanging out at places other than bars. Don't get me wrong, bars are fine but being from NY, I'm more of a cafe type of girl, myself.
Laura when the hell are you moving closer to me so I don't isolate?!?!?!
Im working on it honey! Maybe we can check out a few places in Cocotal soon, And if you can solve the problem of how i transport the trailer to and from home then that will make me move quicker, Cant get round it myself.
No problem. You let me know what I have to do!!
Aren't you proud of me for posting? You know I never do that!
Creativeliza - FYI - Laura and I met on DR1 before either one of moved here, so keep reaching out, you'll definitely meet good friends here!
Aren't you proud of me for posting? You know I never do that!
Creativeliza - FYI - Laura and I met on DR1 before either one of moved here, so keep reaching out, you'll definitely meet good friends here!
Clarification
Just to clarifiy, I totally agree with this post but it appears my intentions were misunderstood. I am just looking for girlfriends not boyfriends or a new relationship. That's another reason why I don't want to try to go to a hangout or bar because unless you are meeting a group of friends you already know, as a single person it is more likely to be construed that you are looking for love/lust if hanging out in a bar.
That being said, I want to thank everyone who has contacted me. I have spoken to several of you and met one so far. I feel I'm well on my way to have a community of friends which is an important step because when the time comes down the road that I am ready to date, I don't want to be vulnerable because I'm lonely. I want to have my life as full as possible. Thanks again.
Just to clarifiy, I totally agree with this post but it appears my intentions were misunderstood. I am just looking for girlfriends not boyfriends or a new relationship. That's another reason why I don't want to try to go to a hangout or bar because unless you are meeting a group of friends you already know, as a single person it is more likely to be construed that you are looking for love/lust if hanging out in a bar.
That being said, I want to thank everyone who has contacted me. I have spoken to several of you and met one so far. I feel I'm well on my way to have a community of friends which is an important step because when the time comes down the road that I am ready to date, I don't want to be vulnerable because I'm lonely. I want to have my life as full as possible. Thanks again.
Creativeliza, I wrongly assumed that you wanted more than a casual friendship with other women. But still, I have to wonder what consequences there might be if traveling to see friends in other cities, could be construe by suspicious people (like me), as a romantic rendenvouz with men. Again, I'm not trying to be negative here. I'm saying that in places like Colombia and, I assume the DR, Women don't have the freedom to come and go without people pointing fingers. Perhaps I'm being a little paranoid. Never mind. Have fun and keep us posted please.
You're right Colombiana, el chisme y el bochinche will reach her ex, and all hell will break loose.
If she goes out with a male friend, people will say that, that's her "Marinovio". If she goes to another city with female friends people will say, that they are in "Calor" (arrechas) looking for a "Macho".
Beware of the las boquitas "chismosas" and "calumniadoras" of Dominican Women that have nothing else to do, some men too.
This is all too funny, a bunch of strangers commenting here and the chismes or gossip already started.......:laugh::laugh:
Indeed.
Creativeliza, can I commend you for the civilised way you handled some of the responses and may I wish you all the best in your future single life, however long it lasts. I for one found your intentions totally clear & am amazed they were misconstrued. Nowhere but nowhere could I find any reference to you wanting intimate relationships with anyone, least of all women. And as a 65 year old with more than one
experience in the men department, marriage department, divorce department, cohabiting department etc etc you sound to be going about this exactly the right way. Best of luck to you! Just have to butt in again to state that one should always be careful about making assumptions about a situation and it's a good idea to find out more before giving advice. My situation is not one of the relationship going cold, falling out of love, but rather that my husband left me and my family to go back to a previous one. He has been living there for 3 months now and claims it is because he has a job there (it's outside of the capital) and he needs to sleep over because he works long hours. However, he took the job out of the blue, in the same town as his ex and 3 kids, and is living there. I tried everything to make it work, talking, fighting, crying, wooing and things stayed the same -- one night a week he would come over and want to behave like he was committed to me. So, if anything is to be construed, it is his behavior and I think it is pretty obvious to anyone who has been here any amount of time what the reality is. For that reason I am not particularly concerned as to what it might look like by wanting to have girlfriends, I just know that going through this alone will leave me vulnerable for this situation to repeat itself and I sure don't want that.
Creativeliza, Just as I made assumptions without basis in fact is how other people will also react. It's human nature to do so. This is why I pointed out what when it comes to women, we can't make a move without people thinking the worse.
Men can go on "business trips", but women will be thought of suspiciously if we want to go anywhere or establish friendships beyond our own family circle. I apologize to you for for talking without engaging my brain. I stand corrected. I wish you eventual peace and hppiness.
Men can go on "business trips", but women will be thought of suspiciously if we want to go anywhere or establish friendships beyond our own family circle. I apologize to you for for talking without engaging my brain. I stand corrected. I wish you eventual peace and hppiness.
creativeliza
I'm new to posting and I don't live in DR. I live in New York and I have to say it takes a lot of courage to reach out to people. I was just visiting in Santo Domingo and it is not easy as a woman especially one who is not dominican to venture out on your own there. If I lived in Santo Domingo I would want to make as many friends as I could both Dominican and ex-pat just so i could feel at home. I'm so sorry to here about your relationship with your husband and I wish you all the best. You made the right move connecting with people.
I'm new to posting and I don't live in DR. I live in New York and I have to say it takes a lot of courage to reach out to people. I was just visiting in Santo Domingo and it is not easy as a woman especially one who is not dominican to venture out on your own there. If I lived in Santo Domingo I would want to make as many friends as I could both Dominican and ex-pat just so i could feel at home. I'm so sorry to here about your relationship with your husband and I wish you all the best. You made the right move connecting with people.
Thanks for the post and to everyone who responded. I must say there are some fascinating people here! I'm really enjoying learning what brought people here, why they stayed and what they are doing. I'm so glad I reached out. It has been exactly what I needed.
DR1 "MEET & Greets" Are A "MUST" !
I have never met anyone "On-The-Make" there,but maybe they just weren't "On-The-Make" for an "Old Man" like me! The next BIG DR1 "Part" will be at "Rocky?s in Sosua,
at USA Thanksgiving in late Nov. (At least if "Tradition" is followed)
You MUST be there! You can probably get a "ride" with people going from "SD". But don?t wait that long to meet some DR1ers. I?m sure that Robert can let you know when he, and some others,will be getting together some Friday or Sat. night.
Cris Colon
I have never met anyone "On-The-Make" there,but maybe they just weren't "On-The-Make" for an "Old Man" like me! The next BIG DR1 "Part" will be at "Rocky?s in Sosua,
at USA Thanksgiving in late Nov. (At least if "Tradition" is followed)
You MUST be there! You can probably get a "ride" with people going from "SD". But don?t wait that long to meet some DR1ers. I?m sure that Robert can let you know when he, and some others,will be getting together some Friday or Sat. night.
Cris Colon
S
sokitoumi
Guest
someone would need to check up on whether Rocky would still be doing the dr1 thanksgiving as he appears to have left Dr1 for reason not yet known