Chiri contemplating exile (long-ish post warning)

[Talldrink]

I agree Gregg, sometimes we need an outside party's opinion or insight to put things into perspective. Also, we may get ideas and suggestions that may have not been brought up by our own.

Chiri, will you let us know what you decide at the end?

Lastly, why cant chirimoyito go to school in Gibraltar?

 

[Larry]

my opinion

Keeping the child out of school for any length of time = mistake.

Juggling the child between cultures like this at this age is probably a mistake too. Spending long amounts of time in both cultures at this age might be confusing as the child is developing his identity. Vacationing in the different culture, on the other hand, is a huge positive as the child is exposed to different things. The child understands that the vacation is just that...a short vacation. The prolonged stay with an indicisive future may not be so good.

If the power problem and how it affects your child is playing such a huge role in your decision, maybe you should attempt to look at things from a different angle. Maybe, at this age, it is not such a bad thing for your child to experience life in such an environment where such things that we adults have become accustomed to and take for granted are not always there. In time, as the situation improves, he will no doubt develop a greater appreciation for certain things. It can be strange how certain things shape one and have a positive affect on the embroidery of ones life.

Lastly, and perhaps most importantly, (assuming you do stay in Gibraltar), is to monitor how the seperation from the childs country and his father appears to be affecting him.

Best of luck to you Chiri.

Larry

 

[Chirimoya]

Thanks for the continued input and supportive sentiments.

Talldrink, I could put my son in school here in Gibraltar but it would be only for three weeks or so if we decide to return on September 21st which is the current plan, so it is not worth the upheaval. I really hope that we will be on our way back on the 21st, otherwise we may be facing a more drastic decision involving the three of us moving here temporarily, and then we would put Chirimoyito in school here. (He is only 4 BTW).

Up till now our summer visits to Gibraltar have been important in that Chirimoyito gets to experience where I come from and to spend time with my side of the family, as well as to reinforce his English. This would have been the last year we spend an extended holiday here because he now goes into formal education and the summer break will be shorter.

Larry, on the question of the positive side of his experiencing adverse conditions, I have a lot of time for that argument and will give it some serious thought. After all, my parents (what could they have been thinking of?) chose to up and move to live in a war zone when I was growing up, and it didn't do me any harm. Then when we came back to Gibraltar in 1979 the border with Spain was still closed (it re-opened fully in 1985) and power cuts were a common ocurrence. The difference - and it made a HUGE difference - was that they were scheduled power cuts and everyone could prepare for the inconvenience.

The thing is I don't think my son particularly notices the effect of the power cuts one way or the other: if we lose power it isn't even that much of an adventure to have to use candlelight or hurricane lamps, because it is simply normal practice as far as he is concerned. I just worry about the harm being done to his health by the generator fumes, and would feel calmer about being there if there were shorter power cuts which also mean we can have the inverter working reliably, enabling us to lead a reasonably normal life.

Someone today told me they had heard of political exiles and economic refugees, whereas I am just a comfort exile. aranoid:

Chiri