Dominican men...liars??????????????

[carmen]

I may have been naive once, shame on me...but never again. They can show me their miserable huts, they can complain about being poor...and I will not feel sorry. I get up at 6:00 a.m. to get ready to go to work. I get home at 6:00 p.m. I don't have the luxury of time that Dominican women have. Mostly all of the women in my husband's family (mother, sister, sister-in-law, aunts...etc.) don't work and then they have the nerve to lament that they have no money....Hey...wake up and get a job...I'm not sending you anything any more. This gringa is tired of supporting those lazy nothings.

There is no need for a girl of 14 to have a baby. And Dominican men should be responsible for who they father. They can you know what with their macho bull...

As far as needing money for food....well....get a job and stand on your own two feet for GOD helps those who help themselves....I'm sick and tired of feeling like the gringa in this family !!!!!!

 

[Eddy]

Awake at last *DC*

 

[X]

Sorry

Sorry to hear this.. I suspect this is not an unusual story
here.

Been thru the same with a Dominican Girl.
New rules for me, do not date a girl who does not have a job
and means of supporting herself, otherwise one is truly the
Gringo in the world.. Another rule is to not send money
to my girlfriend again, it all disappears and they end up asking
for more.. Give an inch, and they do take a mile....

X

 

[X]

Only answer... Take the money out of the relationship and see
if this guy stays with you. If not then accept the fact without
money he goes.

X

 

[Annika]

Hi,
I really know what you mean by being used by a dominican men,in the past my dominican husband didnt work and mostly asked for money so he could go out whith his friends to get drunk on brugal and his family think i have alot of money.
I live in the dominican republic and have my own land,and company but his family is always asking for money for food,going to the doctor even money for buying the pig for christmas.
Unfortunately i have been too nice and giving them money. I always say its the last time but the always come back.
My boyfriend is working now in the company so he help in a way, but i have to say i know how it feels by being used, but in love and a baby together, what can i do.
Annika

 

[Lic. Mercedes Abreu Devillier]

Hey Folks! I'm so sorry to read your complains. Believe me,
I'm a dominican, married to a gringo too, and it really hurts to know that there are that kind of lazy bone characters in my race.

I believe this world has all kinds of people, but it hurts when you are involved in one side and hear the other side is rotten.

I wish you best luck in your next election of husbands or wives.

By the way, I never knew there was a dominican costum of girlfriends asking for money to their "I don't know if I'll marry you", guy. I always heard that you are only obligated with the woman if you are married to her and that women do not have the obligation to give money to their husbans to spend in the street, or for that matter, women are not obligated in any way to support husbands relatives or the other way around. That must be a new version of my countries costums, or perhaps I do not know my people as well as I think.

 

[Cornelio]

Its not only in the DR, they learn it from Europeans i think.
We (european) are easy with giving and helping if you need something you ask and when we have it we will give it.
In asia is the same. Also asking for everything.
Try not listen too fast too the need of people let them ask for a second or third time be a little def maybe it will help you
mostly when your not responding to fast, its over and no hard feeling (but we must try)
a child allways do this and men are like little childs (not?)
Good luck and there are good gringo's and gringa's
especially from DR are friendly people.

 

[BIG DADDY]

very well.
now you have the right attitude.kick them in the butt and show who is the boss.
don't feel like the gringa in the family but show them that the gringa is the boss and no more pesos!!!

 

[Dominicanito]

try not to date the motoconcho drivers, gardners etc...
and you will not have to suport theyr entyre family

 

[Natasha]

Well, "Carmen" it seems like you finally got the attention that you were craving so much afterall. I remember you back in early August, or was it late July, posting the same title - "Dominican men are liars", you then used the name "Ana". Then you posted about how you were doing some sort of "research" on Dominican men. Hogwash.

I suspect you got stuck with a rotten family and a rotten husband, if what you claim is true, of course ;-) Perhaps it is sort of "therapeutic" for you to come to the Internet, and specifically to a Dominican board, to discharge your anger by lumping all Dominicans together.

Fortunately, (perhaps unfortunately for you) the majority of the people who use this board are intelligent human beings who don't buy into mean-spirited and truly absurd generalizations. You are the one who looks bad here "Carmen".

Natasha

 

[Tom]

Natasha

Thanks for taking the time to do the research, I thought it was yet a "different" nut

Tom

 

[Phyllis]

Natasha, you said it well.

I agree with you Natasha; these types of messages always get me going - you can not group all Dominicans together and the sooner people understand this the better!! Afterall, I know of some money takers right here in Canada, and it's not money for their family they need either! It's up to the gringo/gringa with the money to decide whether to share their money with the ones they love - don't blame the Dominican people who don't know what it's like to do without so much!! If a family is in need of food or health care, helping them out can only be a good thing - if a Dominican man wants money to go drinking with buddies and you provide for this, then that's your business but I would second guess his motives... Again, to each their own - using your good judgement and kind heart is God's way!

 

[Lori]

The message board POLICE has spoken.
Admit it, there is truth to what she is saying.

Lori

 

[Katia]

Re: Natasha, you said it well.

I have to agree with Phyllis on this one. You don't have to go to DR to see that people ask for money. Here in Canada, there are plenty of those. And I think it's unfair to qualify ALL Dominican men and/or women as liars. My husband never asked for money from me. He works but he doesn't make a fortune but he gets by. When I visit my sister-in-law in Fantino de Cotui, she never asks for money. Never. She feeds me without asking for anything. Of course, I feel guilty because she does not work (she takes care of 5 children) so I give her a little money for food but she never asks for more.

I suggest people not to put all Dominicans in the same bowl. It's like saying all italians are in the mafia, all Jamaicans are drug dealers.

Carmen, think before you post those kinds of statements.

Katia

 

[Sarah]

Here's the truth...Lori, "Carmen", et al...

There are not enough jobs to go around. And the jobs that are available don't pay enough to support large families. Your answer, "Get a job.", doesn't fly.

"Carmen" is an outright racist, deserving every bad thing the ever comes her way. And Lori, you must be too. Both of you are invited to never visit this board again. Your sentiments are not welcome here.

Children are having children the world over. The DR is no exception. And neither is the USA, Canada, or any other country. It happens everywhere. Society, parents, and the children are all to blame. And FATHERS should be held responsible regardless of nationality or race.

When will the world come to realize that we are all created equal. Sure, there are cultural differences, but those differences are what make the world a more interesting place. Imagine if we were all the SAME!? Sounds pretty boring to me.

 

[CharlieW]

Re: Bravo Natasha!!

Misery loves company and it is apparent that Carmen (Ana) was only looking for more company. Thanks Natasha for keeping a board poster honest. It is very nice that we have some one of your integrity and intelligence that helps the rest of us see through a contrived post. While poster "Carmen" may have had a bad experience with a Dominican family, it is certainly an injustice to generalize all Dominicans.

 

[Natasha]

Ah, Lori. I will take being the board "police" as a compliment, thank you ;-)

Hummmm...the perennial concept of "truth". What is the "truth"? If you want to engage in a discussion about the "truth", I invite you to e-mail me so that we can discuss it. You see, I don't use this word in my vocabulary very often, so I think it would be an interesting discussion between you and me.

Ignorance is not bliss, Lori.

Regards,
Natasha

 

[Lic. Mercedes Abreu Devillier]

Re: Here's the truth...Lori, "Carmen", et al...

Bravo Sarah!

 

[Sarah]

De nada, solamente la verdad! *DC*

 

[Richard]

Your generalization is pathetic. No matter where one is there will always be users and abusers, not just in the Dominican Republic. Why not put the blame on yourself where it rightly belongs. Your tale of woe has been repeated and repeated for years by many women who have moved not only the DR but every island in the West Indies. Unfortunately there is a world ofdifference in cultures and due to so many reasons such as poor educationjobs in the islands are hard to come by due to lack of education hence lack ofopportunity. When people from other countries arrive in the DR they are easily seduced by handsome men, sexy women, gentle breezes, the whole allure of the tropics. It should not be hard to understand that many Dominican men will show great interest in someone who spends more money in a night out for dinner than the average Dominican earns in a month. This isn't going to change until tourists start realizing that they are better to have their one or two week fling; get on the plane and go home. When the plane takes off, rest assured that the newfound love of their life is meeting a new gringo or gringa within a few hours. In your case, I'm sorry to sound so harsh but if life is so bad,you should seriously think about returning home instead of bad-mouthing all Dominican men.