- Thread starter bri777
- Start date
It just puzzles me lol
Exactly, and also everyone gossips, so some of the fairy tale endings you hear on here are not true. I have held my tongue many a time with people on here, knowing that they're full of crap with the "my husband" this it "my wife" that.
But I am sure that there are happy endings. Just few and far between, maybe??
SHALENA
Not that I am saying I have a "success story" or a failure but I would think the main reason people drop off is also in part to the negativity. yes people come on here looking for a little advice and guidance from people who have been there and yes ultimately everyone will do what they want in the end.
At this point mine is neither but I am definitely enjoying how things have been going and nothing has felt forced, rushed or "heavy on the romance". it's felt like things should, 2 people getting to know one another and seeing where it all leads. Eyes are still wide open but not going to turn my back on something that at this point feels right.
Well, we just celebrated our anniversary, we are 2 freaks that found each other 
. The recipe is to be open and be yourself so that the other "part" can see himself/herself in you and find you. Sometimes its worth to give a person a 2nd look, even if you didnt like him/her from the first sight.
. The recipe is to be open and be yourself so that the other "part" can see himself/herself in you and find you. Sometimes its worth to give a person a 2nd look, even if you didnt like him/her from the first sight.Pardon me for intruding on what might be called a "feminista" chat
If it was my story.... I think I would expose my feelings after the happening..... not before
I am dubious of the "searchers" that come up here.... Why do they search?
What's different than where you live? The vacation part... maybe.
I dunno
If it was my story.... I think I would expose my feelings after the happening..... not before
I am dubious of the "searchers" that come up here.... Why do they search?
What's different than where you live? The vacation part... maybe.
I dunno
Manu, there's an old thread...... http://www.dr1.com/forums/men-mars-women-venus/30782-successful-relationships-dominican-style.html
Yes, there are success stories here on DR1. We're coming up to our 35th wedding anniversary, and Hillbilly has us beat by a lot.
My husband is one of 6 kids - he's the only one still on his first spouse. All the others married Dominicans of their same [middle] class the first time around. Point being that just because we made it [this far anyway!] doesn't mean that the next gringo/dom marriage will. How many dom/dom, gringo/gringa marriages succeed?
Not a lot. Now, add in cultural/racial/age issues that many have......
AE
Yes, there are success stories here on DR1. We're coming up to our 35th wedding anniversary, and Hillbilly has us beat by a lot.
My husband is one of 6 kids - he's the only one still on his first spouse. All the others married Dominicans of their same [middle] class the first time around. Point being that just because we made it [this far anyway!] doesn't mean that the next gringo/dom marriage will. How many dom/dom, gringo/gringa marriages succeed?
Not a lot. Now, add in cultural/racial/age issues that many have......
AE
@Leeanimal
Negativity weeds out the punk a$$es.
BTW....I could use the search function and show you your post written in 10 different ways, all saying the same thing. You ain't the first one to ride this rodeo sweetie.
Maybe it'll have more weight behind it in a year or two
SHALENA
Cue, JoseMexicano.....
Negativity weeds out the punk a$$es.
BTW....I could use the search function and show you your post written in 10 different ways, all saying the same thing. You ain't the first one to ride this rodeo sweetie.
Maybe it'll have more weight behind it in a year or two
SHALENA
Cue, JoseMexicano.....
Marriage ain't easy for anyone. My Dominican wife was no gold digger but a shy country girl and at 25 her parents were happy to see her get married just like mine because I was 34. We met by chance at the airport in Santiago when I was here working for a short time. Before we got married very early on I asked if she was a Christian and wanted kids. It's easy to be forward when you can barely speak the language.
Not everyone searches. Sometimes it's the last thing they expect. The guy I was dating for several years drove me to the airport the first time I flew to DR with some girls from the travel agency I worked for - we just wanted to escape the NY snow for a few days. One of the girls with us had been there before and was dating a guy, and she already knew my husband from a prior trip because he was one of his friends. If we hadn't been introduced that way, in a group setting, I probably never would have even spoken to him.
Who knew?
And my friend who introduced us? Never married, but living very happily in Santo Domingo for many years.
AE
I'm not the first and I won't be the last.
This may be my first experience like this but it definitely is not my first "rodeo" with liars and cheater who only want to hurt and steal. That lesson was learned right in my own backyard.
Sharing experiences is valuable and keeps people level headed but it does not need to become a personal attack, it's human nature to seek out others who may have been in a similar situation.
The lesson I learned here was to just do as I normally would and do what feels right, the second it doesn't I'm out. I wasn't searching for a relationship, I can get that here. And that's all I have to say on why some people might drop off of telling their stories.....
As for the successess, they are out there. I have friends who are VERY happily married to people they met while on vacation (one in Dominican and one in Cuba). It can happen you just have to be careful as you would with anyone else, no matter where they are from.
tell me more
Lord hammercy chile....u knows I don't gossip. But all I gots to say is all that glitters isn't gold and all that a person says isn't always true. Gots some of 'em out there wit they husbands workin' driving a pickup full of platanos, but here on DR1, they claim hubby is damn near hob-bobbin' wit el presidente Leonel.......
But I ain't one to gossip, so u ain't heard it from me!
SHALENA
Ok so here's the real deal.
When people are searching the internet to find more info about Dominicans they have already painted a pretty picture in their heads and are now looking for conformation of this new and fantastic feeling they brought back with them.
We tell them all the bad things that can happen and all the things they need to watch and listen for and if it all works out great we'll be happy for them but at least they were warned that there are sharks in the waters.
We have no idea who they've met so why ask? We can only go on past experiences of former posters and or friends we know. It's good to know the bad things first and if it doesn't fit the person you met great best of luck to you.
If you don't want to hear negative things then for the love of God don't ask a bunch of strangers on the internet to assess a person we don't know.
It's raining again and I'm grumpy
When people are searching the internet to find more info about Dominicans they have already painted a pretty picture in their heads and are now looking for conformation of this new and fantastic feeling they brought back with them.
We tell them all the bad things that can happen and all the things they need to watch and listen for and if it all works out great we'll be happy for them but at least they were warned that there are sharks in the waters.
We have no idea who they've met so why ask? We can only go on past experiences of former posters and or friends we know. It's good to know the bad things first and if it doesn't fit the person you met great best of luck to you.
If you don't want to hear negative things then for the love of God don't ask a bunch of strangers on the internet to assess a person we don't know.
It's raining again and I'm grumpy
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People with good relationships don't need to come here looking for advice on relationships so you don't hear from them.
People with doubts, red flags etc come here looking for answers because their head tells them one thing and their heart says another. They rarely listen to the advice given and most of these couples don't make it much past a visa (if they even get that far).
My husband and I have been "successful" so far because we work hard at our marriage, share all of the responsibilities and communicate well. We didn't rush our wedding, we have spent time living together in each other's country and we share similiar values, goals, education and ambition.
I personally know quite a few great couples that have been successful but for every good story there is probably 20+ bad ones.
People with doubts, red flags etc come here looking for answers because their head tells them one thing and their heart says another. They rarely listen to the advice given and most of these couples don't make it much past a visa (if they even get that far).
My husband and I have been "successful" so far because we work hard at our marriage, share all of the responsibilities and communicate well. We didn't rush our wedding, we have spent time living together in each other's country and we share similiar values, goals, education and ambition.
I personally know quite a few great couples that have been successful but for every good story there is probably 20+ bad ones.
I think that people in the initial stage of their relationiships come here because they are researching all things Dominican...and their searches lead them here. Then they read about the whole sanky thing, and are taken aback, and wonder if their situation is a sanky one. No one wants to believe it's true, but at least the fact that they are asking questions is a good thing! Isn't it better that they post here and wonder, than to never ask a question at all and treat it like a relationship they'd have with just anyone? I think sometimes people are too quick to judge...when the poster may just be trying to do some due diligence. That being said, I go crazy reading ALL the stories too...
I think its the "Latin Thing"...... having just returned to NoAm after 4 months, I see a difference in RD.... can't express it quite yet.
But RD offers a freedom.........I dunno..... More equality? Less Judgemental?
Still thinking
But RD offers a freedom.........I dunno..... More equality? Less Judgemental?
Still thinking