'Twas the night before Christmas, when all through the house Not a creature was stirring, not even a mouse; The children were nestled all snug in their beds, While the parents huddled by their monitors in hopes that the pie report would soon be there...
On that note we turn this over to our reporter on the scene in Sosua, Myrr Frankincense for late breaking developments.
Good evening everyone and a Merry Christmas to all. I am in front Gringo Fortress within the municipality of Sosua where a crowd has gathered to witness the aftermath of a holiday tragedy. Details remain unclear but here is what we know so far. Christmas dinner inside the palatial home was a smashing success. Even now, diners can be seen shedding their belts as the have run out of holes with which to loosen them. The trouble began after the dishes for the main course were cleared in preparation for desert. My sources tell me the whipped cream was peaking perfectly with just enough sugar added to bring on diabetes in just about anyone who consumed a mouthful.
As the now famous pumpkin pie was being transferred from the refrigerator to the counter, apparently one of the two dogs onsite ran between the legs of his owner causing the pie to fall to the floor. Cdn_Gringo, having eaten so much turkey and fixings just minutes before was unable to bend over sufficiently to retrieve the pie. Seizing upon the opportunity, both dogs began to devour the festive gift from on high in big gulps, forgoing any attempt at chewing. In desperation Sr. Gringo threw the bowl of freshly whipped cream at the dogs in a futile attempt to dissuade them from further debauchery. This just intensified the feeding frenzy and in short order the kitchen floor was cleaner then it had been all week.
I am attempting to contact one or both of the dogs for comment, but am having difficulty locating them. A neighbor commented that she thought she heard yelping and the distinct rapport of two shotgun blasts not 45 minutes ago. We have only seen the people inside intermittently as they appear at the side of the Villa to toss some of their possessions into an idling car. Barely audible over the murmur of the gathered crowd, I am pretty sure I overheard C. Gringo requesting airline tickets for the first flight going somewhere.
That's all I have for you at this time. I will update this unfolding story as new information becomes available. For now, it's back to our regularly scheduled programming - I'm Myrrh Frankincense on location in Sosua, back to the studio...
...While visions of sugar-plums danced in their heads; And mamma in her ’kerchief, and I in my cap, Had just settled our brains for a long winter’s nap...