Canadian fooled

[Alyonka]

Well said. Class has little to with education and even less to do with wealth.

Class, just the same as trust, friendship, affection, connection, love or any other type of feeling cannot be bought, sold, transferred, given to anyone else, or simply paid for. It is either there or not. I noticed a lot of materialistic people get obsessed with flashy objects (monkeys like those too) lack class almost entirely

 

[Lambada]

How are you doing, Canadian Fooled? Been able to make a decision yet?

 

[paddy]

This thread is starting to be like "Days of our Lives"...

 

[canadiangirl858]

Canadian Fooled...whatever you do, do not let him come to Canada. STOP the process now. It is not too late. Send immigration letters and emails to stop the sponsorship. Send the letters by registered mail so you have proof you sent them.
I sponsored my husband and 8 weeks after coming to Canada he left. My 3 year sponsorship is finished now but believe me for those 3 years it was very stressful for me not knowing if I would get a letter from social assistance asking me to pay back money. Forget about the money you previously spent on him...think about your future without him. You'll be thankful in the end. I know I am. PM me if you want.

 

[ElizaJ]

Canadian Fooled

i would stop the process if i were you!, because once he is in canada you will have abligations as a sponsor, sounds like one of those sanky panky who will suck the blood out of your veins.aranoid:

 

[joyterrell1]

The relationship between men and women here on this island (both sides) are so different that really, really, truely (madly deeply) there is not going to be ANY way for an American, or Canadian woman to adjust to a Dominican man unless she meets a lot of criteria --- such as -- speaking fluent Spanish, being raised and trained in a religion which really supports male patriarchal, dominance, having a deep tolerance for infidelity--- I am sorry to tell you all this...

For the foreign men, the women here are a blessed relief from the women that they have had to contend with at home. But as much as it is paradise for the men, it can be the opposite for the women.

And, alas, the men here also appear to be experts at courtship, at the Don Juan stuff, at opening up the hearts so that women are really at risk here.

In researching an article on Machismo here recently I came across a chilling statistic which is that this country ranks as 6th in the WORLD in "feminicide" which is a word that I could not even translate easily - since we don't have a comparable in English. It means women being murdered by their intimate partners.

And alas, to just seed this with ideas from another thread, the presence of all these evangelical Protestants preaching "the man is the head of the woman"--- not very helpful here.

Count your blessings.

Do they really quote that??

 

[joyterrell1]

I realize that you might not be aware of Canadian laws but if he does get here (Canada) disappearing would be a good thing but our immigration laws say that she is responsible for him for 3 years. That means that if he does disappear and can't get a job and goes for welfare the government will go after her for every penny paid out to him for the next 3 years.

If he doesn't want to be married to her then cut it off right now because it only gets worse from here. Margaret has provided some good info.

Dear God!!

 

[joyterrell1]

The relationship between men and women here on this island (both sides) are so different that really, really, truely (madly deeply) there is not going to be ANY way for an American, or Canadian woman to adjust to a Dominican man unless she meets a lot of criteria --- such as -- speaking fluent Spanish, being raised and trained in a religion which really supports male patriarchal, dominance, having a deep tolerance for infidelity--- I am sorry to tell you all this... /QUOTE]

I have to add my 2 cents here. In 1975 I went on vacation to DR with a friend who went there often. She introduced me to a Dominican she knew who was a dealer in the hotel casino. Long story short, we've been married 32 years, have 2 children, 27 & 29 yrs old, and a beautiful 2 yr old grandson who we've brought to the DR twice. I didn't speak a word of Spanish in '75 and I learned quickly that I would sit like a bump on a log with his large family because he was the only one who spoke English. Today I speak Spanish well enough. His family is my family and vice-versa. We own property in the DR and visit there a couple of times a year. He's a wonderful husband and father, and the best son-in-law my parents could have ever imagined. I'm an Italian American New Yorker who would never tolerate infidelity - not all Dominican men are the same (although I must admit that more than one of my five sister-in-laws have gone through hell because of it). Within 10 years we'll be retiring, and will probably spend 6 months a year in the DR. That friend who introduced us in '75 has been living in Santo Domingo over 10 years now -some of you may even know her - and except for our political differences we're still good buddies!

How do you know if they are good and right for you? Please help--see my thread--"I met a guy in Samana"--thanks

 

[joyterrell1]

There is no difference between low and high education/income men when it comes to women. They are all the same this way. Men with more money and better education can become more obnoxious and arrogant because their choice of women is wider. It is all about how well they are brought up and how much class their family has. Not just about money and education.

My sentiments exactly!!!

 

[cigarjoe]

Canadian fooled or Canadian fool??

Why is it that the :majority" of the suckers are either Britts or Canadians??
Ha!

 

[DominicanBilly]

Yes, because we ,you, most of us want to believe.

I have the same question........I have been in a relationship with a DR man, younger than myself for 11 months, married for 5 months. We met when he was in entertainment, he lost the job 2 months into our relationship. He was going to seek another entertainment job but I told him to seek something else as I didn't want him doing that. He has turned down 3 jobs in entertainment as he doesn't want me to be worried. I have fully trusted and believed him. I paid for our wedding as he had no money and said that he would repay me everything upon arriving and working in Canada. I have helped him each month with money. I spent a week with him at Christmas. He told me that his brother got a job in entertainment and he needs to be working again, he needs money, doesn't want my money. Wants a motorcycle.......we got into an argument as I couldn't understand why he would spend money on a motorcycle when he is coming to Canada and should have other focuses right now. Anyway, argument was ulgy on my part......I have been very stressed. Argument was in front of his brother.......

When I returned home I learned that his brother told him to "get rid of me".....and he has ended our marriage......basically will not even talk to me.

I am devasted!!! I loved him......have I also be conned?

Most Canadians & Britts are nice people and want to believe everyone is a nice person and not a con. So it is easy to be taken advantage of.

That's not to say the Americans, Swiss, Germans etc don't fall in to the same traps. It is so easy to think "oh I can make this persons life so much better with just a little help".

They will love and respect me forever! hahaha.

 

[AlterEgo]

Luck of the draw?

How do you know if they are good and right for you? Please help--see my thread--"I met a guy in Samana"--thanks

It worked for me - but after reading the posts here I think I may be an exception. It helped that he came from a middle class home, his mother was a teacher, his father a police lieutenant, both with good strong backgrounds and strong family ties and morals. Two of his brothers have MBAs, one is a CPA, one owns a restaurant and only one is a bum aranoid: We also didn't have to deal with the race issue, he looks like he's from southern Spain or southern Italy. I think it's a crap shoot. Or maybe we just got married so long ago that the sanky club hadn't been formed yet :squareeye So much written here is very true. I think these Dominican men often really believe they are in love, but maybe more in love with the idea of the gringa than the actual person. It's considered by many to be quite the feather in their cap to have one.

 

[dragonfly5555]

feather in cap?

. I think these Dominican men often really believe they are in love, but maybe more in love with the idea of the gringa than the actual person. It's considered by many to be quite the feather in their cap to have one.

Why is that anyway? Why considered a feather in their cap? And do other Dominicans actually think that or do they think of the man with the gringa as a sankie?