Why do Dominicans lie???

aimelove

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Aug 26, 2007
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I enjoy this site and talking about whatever, but these discussions are about me and my feelings and ideas. I may use my wife as an example, but only because she is Dominican. There is no reason to bring my wife into any of this. I don't usually take things personal, but I am protective of my loved ones. KEEP MY WIFE OUT YOUR POSTS
 

Rocky

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I enjoy this site and talking about whatever, but these discussions are about me and my feelings and ideas. I may use my wife as an example, but only because she is Dominican. There is no reason to bring my wife into any of this. I don't usually take things personal, but I am protective of my loved ones. KEEP MY WIFE OUT YOUR POSTS
There is a PM feature available to you.
There's no sense trashing the whole thread.
 

aimelove

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Aug 26, 2007
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Ok, but it wasn't "trashing the thread" when a complete stranger makes some off the cuff remark using my wife to make his/her point.?

Maybe PM's are the classier way to go, but did that person go that route? I will respect the rules and go that route in the future, but sometimes you have to set the record straight before people get the wrong idea and get out of hand. A thousand pardons.
 

Janin

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Jul 31, 2007
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She Knows.

... That is why people don't know what political(...) correctness means but still know better than to air their private views about sensitive issues publicly. Even in DR. Also, leave my wife out of your posts. She's part of my family and you don't know her. Obviously you are not married or married to someone you don't respect.

That's irrelevant.
Your Dominican wife is the closest person to explain whether 'political correctness' means much in this country, which again may shed some light on why Dominicans do not stick to the truth in many occasions.

Also, don't make assumption about my marital status, you don't know me... ;)

Janin
 

Janin

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Dominican Wives

... KEEP MY WIFE OUT YOUR POSTS

Had you not mentioned your wife in an earlier post I would not have even known that she's Dominican.
Of course I did not insult your wife either, on the contrary, I would assume that you respect her and her opinions.

And what's more convincing than have a native speaker talk about a term and its meaning in his/her country.
I for one always turn to my wife whenever I am uncertain about certain usage and meanings...

Janin
 

Criss Colon

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It "SEEMS" Condescending, Because YOU DON"T LIVE HERE!

If you actually did LIVE here you would see that what "ROCKY" says is "SPOT ON"!,and therefore NOT condescending, but a FACT!
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aimelove

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Aug 26, 2007
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I don't have any curiousity about why Dominicans lie , I just know that they do, and it can be annoying. I TRY to keep my life interesting enough that I am reading and reacting more to situations than reflecting about them. This forum stuff is something that I picked up during the summer while I wasn't teaching. I prefer being out in the world around real people. Like the difference between a ballplayer that is actually doing things and a fan who thinks they're an expert about what the ballplayer is doing. Most of my posts are personal stories that relate to the thread. Not "I don't understand why" type of stuff. I am pretty well traveled, and I make those determinations on my own.

I am pretty calm now. Still I bet a dollar you aren't even involved seriously with someone. You wouldn't have taken the conversation there if you were. Go ahead and respond with your imaginary boyfriend or husband.
 

aimelove

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Aug 26, 2007
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Janin

Let's turn the page. You have a wonderful day. Its really not that serious and your last post helps me understand that you didn't think you were being rude.
I am going to see my Yankees today and working on my lesson for the first day of school. No need to get my knickers in a knot over some internet stuff. I sincerely hope you have a day full of smiles.
 

Janin

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Jul 31, 2007
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Smiles

... I sincerely hope you have a day full of smiles.
Thank you, wishing you the same.

I don't take message boards seriously (owning one myself).

On the other hand:
You owe me 1 $.... :laugh: :lick:
And I sent you a PM.

Janin
 

aimelove

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Aug 26, 2007
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Do you want it in pesos, euro or dollars? I would actually need a DNA sample and fingerprint from your sweetheart for you to collect. Sorry. Rules are rules (lol).

I consider myself a really nice person with love for everybody, but I love my wife and family more than anything. I cherish them. I got a little off track and upset when I saw the word wife on the screen. Took it out of context.

Moderator. I know this is like 180 degrees off topic, but I just wanted to clear the air.
 

Rocky

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If I catch you and Janin swapping spit, I'm going to vomit.

kiss-the-frog.jpg
 

aimelove

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Nothing gets a woman in the bed faster than being the first one to apologize.

Just kidding. Don't want to take away from the sincerity of what I said before.
 

aimelove

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Aug 26, 2007
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Rocky,

I think I am going to vomit. I just went back and read the thread and it turns out that Janin is a man (or at least mentioned a wife). I meant what I said about being sorry, but I wouldn't have attempted to be so sweet and sensitive (and somewhat flirty) about it had I known it was a man.

When you ASSUME you make and ASS out of U and ME.
 

Rocky

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Nothing gets a woman in the bed faster than being the first one to apologize.

Just kidding. Don't want to take away from the sincerity of what I said before.
You're about to step into the "Twilight Zone".
Rumour is that Janin is actually a transvestite frog !!!

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aimelove

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Its bad enough I am picturing what my students are gonna be like this year. I don't need any supporting actors in my nightmares.
 

Lambada

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Was that the intermission? :laugh:

Getting back to Act 2 in this thread.....................

The part of your quote below aimelove I believe indicates the difference in our philosophy of teaching (& yes I used to teach adults). I tended to learn alongside my students - it was a 2 way street. And I don't know that 'I know better', really I don't. All I would say is that 'I know different' (transvestite frogs notwithstanding.............) So if you think I am smug (& you may well be correct, although I prefer the word opinionated :) ) perhaps a little self-examination would be in order..................? My presence on this thread to learn not to teach. And what I am seeing on the 'lying' issue is a cultural difference in definition. Where these are the 'excuse' type lies they are defined as lies by the non-Dominicans here but perhaps not by many Dominicans? I don't believe it is about 'lying' as such. I think the 'excuses' are about not losing face. This is where the European/N.American definition of truth collides with latino machismo I think.



I want to encourage them to say what they believe to be true so that someone who knows better can help them out of that mindset. If you smugly ask them not to say those things because its not politically correct, the dialogue ends. Like a parent anwering a child's question "because I said so".
 

Alyonka

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Was that the intermission? are defined as lies by the non-Dominicans here but perhaps not by many Dominicans? I don't believe it is about 'lying' as such. I think the 'excuses' are about not losing face. This is where the European/N.American definition of truth collides with latino machismo I think.

I agree with this, they think they are doing the right thing by lying. But the problem is that they are "loosing the face" when doing it. People start talking, laughing at them behind their back and stop taking them seriously. Everyone knows the story about that boy that cried wolves ... When you lie, lie ...... lie and then tell the truth - no one will believe you.
 

Berzin

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Nov 17, 2004
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For the very same reason kids do.

In short, they are childlike, which has a lot to do with why they are so easy going and happy go lucky, have little awareness of time, responsibility and danger.
We wouldn't love them as much as we do if they weren't that way.
We are attracted to their casual ways with easy smiles, and if they ever became "mature" as people from the industrialized nations do, they would lose that beautiful charm they have.

Beautiful charm until you try to get a straight answer out of them about something important. Then it just gets frustrating and annoying.

And of course they love lying, but HATE being lied to. I just love seeing Dominicans flying off the handle when they get a taste of their own medicine and don't like it.

And to the OP yes, eventually to survive you will have to become just like them. If you live in the DR and are an ex-pat leave your western sensibilities at home-they will only be a hindrance to you in the DR.
 

Rocky

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Beautiful charm until you try to get a straight answer out of them about something important. Then it just gets frustrating and annoying.
Having worked with Dominicans for many years, I'm am painfully aware of the inconveniences of being lied to.
That being said, I don't hate them for it, nor do I perceive them as bad people for it.
I believe that I have a good understanding of the culture and the reasons behind some of the idiosyncrasies.