Dazed & Confused

[Rocky]

Which is your glass eye? I want to stay on your blind side. I can't tell. By the time you make your last bet in poker, both eyes look glassy.

He's a sly opponent.
He switches that glass eye from side to side to confuse his opponents.
The secret is to never look him in the eye and keep a close watch on that quick draw colostomy bag.
Don't be fooled by it's soft looking exterior.
He has been known to load it up with bricks.

 

[Larry]

You north coast people are strange.

When is the next poker game? I am due for a trip up there.


Larry

 

[HOWMAR]

He's a sly opponent.
He switches that glass eye from side to side to confuse his opponents.
The secret is to never look him in the eye and keep a close watch on that quick draw colostomy bag.
Don't be fooled by it's soft looking exterior.
He has been known to load it up with bricks.

So you are saying he bluffed me when I said he was "full of shyte", when he bet all-in.

 

[Rocky]

You north coast people are strange.
Larry

Says who?
I remember you participating in that Dominically confused thread.
And I quote,

Try taking 1 viagra per day and chase it with a few Presidentes. That should help.
Larry

The presedente will dull your senses and you wont care if you are confused because you will be drunk, happy and sexually satisfied. Nothing to be confused about as long as you have your priorities in order.

Alan, that is interesting but had Rocky diligently practiced the art of drinking as you described, he would not be a "sunkie", but a "drunkie". The only real remedy for his current state as a "sunkie" is to have sex with a "munkie".

Now tell us we're strange.

 

[Larry]

Says who?
I remember you participating in that Dominically confused thread.
And I quote,






Now tell us we're strange.

Never mind.

Larry <----- rubbing head

 

[Rocky]

So you are saying he bluffed me when I said he was "full of shyte", when he bet all-in.

You got it pal.
He would have you believe it's as soft as a nerf ball, but he can knock you right off your feet from 5 paces, what with that brick inside.
I suggest you ban colostomy bag tossing in your duel and settle for something more civil like dwarf tossing, to settle your differences.

 

[Rocky]

Larry <----- rubbing head

Why?
Did Alan get you with his colostomy bag?

 

[HOWMAR]

Never mind.

Larry <----- rubbing head

Damn, stop with the Viagra when you're alone already.

 

[HOWMAR]

You north coast people are strange.

When is the next poker game? I am due for a trip up there.


Larry

BTW, the game is Tuesday and Friday nights at 8:00PM.

 

[Rocky]

BTW, the game is Tuesday and Friday nights at 8:00PM.

And Thursdays are reserved for duels.

 

[HOWMAR]

And Thursdays are reserved for duels.

No mental duels permitted as many of us are unarmed.

 

[Larry]

Damn, stop with the Viagra when you're alone already.

I take LaPela.

Larry

 

[BushBaby]

No mental duels permitted as many of us are unarmed.

I would go along with that - Evening All, as Jack Wartner used to say!

 

[BushBaby]

Okay, so my fingers are too big for fast movement (like other areas) It was Jack Warner as P C Dixon of Dock Green I was refering to!

 

[apostropheman]

Now you've gone too far. I'm deciding to challenge you to a duel. Colostomy bags at five paces, let the shyt fly. But i'm warning you, I have a zip prosthetic leg concealed in my g string.

now there's an image i could have lived my entire life without seeing...thanksgre:

 

[Rocky]

Okay, so my fingers are too big for fast movement (like other areas) It was Jack Warner as P C Dixon of Dock Green I was refering to!

As a Brit, surely you can give us the official rules on duels, specifically colostomy bag dueling.

 

[BushBaby]

As a Brit, surely you can give us the official rules on duels, specifically colostomy bag dueling.

Generally speaking you stand back to back with colestomy bags touching (lovingly) then walk 15 paces at the command of the referee. At the 15th step (10th step if you decide to cheat & bash the dol-ay-lees out of your opponent) you turn & fire the offending item at your oponents midrift!!

The alternative way is to hold your OPPONENTS bag in your hand & pull it away from it's attchment to HIS midrift at the earliest time possible!

 

[planner]

Okay you boys are sick puppies.......... but entertaining!

 

[AlaninDR]

Generally speaking you stand back to back with colestomy bags touching (lovingly) then walk 15 paces at the command of the referee. At the 15th step (10th step if you decide to cheat & bash the dol-ay-lees out of your opponent) you turn & fire the offending item at your oponents midrift!!

The alternative way is to hold your OPPONENTS bag in your hand & pull it away from it's attchment to HIS midrift at the earliest time possible!

Thank you Grahame
I'm certainly glad the nasty word "integrity" was not used. Being the multifunctional person that I am, my intentions are, while back to back, to trip Howmar with my prosthetic leg, puncture his colostomy bag with my EdwardScissor hand while at the same time doing a loop with my colostomy bag for a direct hit to the head. If anything fails, my ultra secret weapon is that i've loaded explosive into my head, when ignited, my glass eye will shoot out like a cannon ball. And I still have my g string in reserve.
"just when I thought I was out, they pull me back in"
What was the topic of this thread?

 

[Chris]

What was the topic of this thread?

You're in the living forum. We give latitude for 'living' here. And it seems as if y'all are living it up. :laugh::laugh: The topic was Dazed and Confused.