Have you ever considered

[Chip]

SO, can you give us a rough "adjustment timeline" for those wanting to move here? Let's say they have rudamentary basic Spanish down (not DR Spanish) to start...care to make rough guess?

I know this comment was directed at Lambada, but if I may...

I don't know necessarily if language is so important because I understand that many expats are able to get along with much less than fluent. However, it is important to make contacts to call on when there are problems, such as lawyers, handymen, mechanics etc. These can be had typically throught friends, Dominicans or otherwise.

There will always be problems, due to inefficiency and general lack of ability to care for one's job as nothing much more than a means of getting a paycheck. However, this is greatly mitigated by the pace of life - one learns to move a a slower pace and accepts some inconveniences, because after all it is expected to have to take care of certain personal items. Furthermore, the great plus if one can actually get to the level of being fluent is that Dominicans are very friendly compared to Westerners not to mention very open too so meeting people is always a pleasure. The fact that one is a Westerner is always a source of conversation so it is very easy to keep one entertained, whether it be the gym, grocery store, pharmacy, etc if one is so inclined. I have found personally as my Spanish has gotten better that I seem to have less and less experiences where the locals just see me as a "source" of income and do whatever posturing they feel is necessary to get me to give them money.

Also, the fact that we have a local small supermarket and farmacy that have delivery for RD10, not incl the tip and I work in my home, we honestly don't have to leave the house a whole lot if we don't need to. In fact, my wife hardly gets out of the house except on the weekends to see the family. All in all life ends up being much less stressfull here. I have been here two years btw.

 

[Lambada]

Lambada: Have you a generalized "timeline" for becoming "aplatinado"? I'm curious as to how long you feel it takes to get over the hassle factor? We've moved around quite a bit and there is some sense of settling after the two years we've been here but we still have those times when it just seems like everything takes 20 x longer and with more effort to get people to do the jobs they are paid to do.

When we no longer use terms like 'it takes 20 times longer' because we already know instinctively how long it will take and we make judgements in the Dominican timeline not the gringo one; when we already know that the delivery (or whatever) will not take place tomorrow, in other words when we move from 'conscious competence' to 'unconscious competence' as per
Offshore Living News Offshorewave ? Culture Shock Revisited - Groping Towards A More Useful Conceptual Framework - by Ginnie Bedggood

One day, way after one has got to the stage of 'unconscious competence' one suddenly becomes aware that one has. From then on in it is instinctual, one is operating on feel (soul & heart) not head (knowledge). Then I suspect one has a touch of aplatanado. The length of time will be different for everyone because we all start from different places. I certainly didn't get to that point in two years so I don't think anyone need self-flagellate because they haven't either.

Je suis desole!

Thank you - from the non fixer-schmixer :laugh::laugh:

 

[AZB]

This is how I avoid problems in DR. I just don't expect much from dominicans. if they say tomorrow, it mean, tomorrow or day after or never. You have to get inside their minds to be able to understand them. If you are making plans with a dominican about some activity for tomorrow and you go into details and all. Then the dominican changes his or her mind the next day. You call in to confirm the time and if you hear the word " para cuando"? (when?). so naturally you will say "for today, like we had planned yesterday...". Then they will say. "ohhhhhh, today no, I am busy, I didn't know you were talking about today....". So when you hear the word "cuando". Stop right there. This means, NOT TODAY.
So if you make a date with a girl, make sure you have plan B and plan C also ready. Chances are, your Plan A will cancel on you by turning off her phone.

I know if I dominicans need something from you, they will call and wait on you. If you need something from them and they can't deliver, they won't say "no" to you, they will simply turn off the phone. So better have plan B ready, just in case.
If a job requires 1 week, be prepared for 2 weeks. if a job requires perfection, then better find someone who can do it perfectly or do it yourself.

Remember any electronic item that can burn out, will burn out sooner or later. lend money to a dominican that you are willing to lose. Give it to him as a gift because you would have to kiss his ass to get it back.

Think like dominicans and you will have a easier time understanding them. Try to be in their shoes and you will have an easier time forgiving them.
learn to speak spanish like them and you will be widely accepted. The prices will become more dominican. All in all, just become a dominican while you are living there. This will make your life very easy and livable.
I come late and i don't even apologize. I pay bribes to get things done faster. i break laws and look the other way. I simply don't care anymore, just like dominicans. I will deal with it when time comes. I see the only people who suffer here and get into problems are the onces who care too much about every little bitty detail in life. I have come to realize, I didn't come here to live like as though I was still in atlanta. I will do what romans do. Just live a simple life and stop worrying about little details. Just stop thinking sometimes. hahahahaha
AZB

 

[planner]

The adjustment time seems to differ as do the people adjusting. Some do it faster and easier and others struggle forever. I think it is a matter of your attitude plus aptitude.

As to language - my personal opinion - those that do not at least try to learn the language are ignorant. WE are guests in this country not the other way around! It is our job to adapt as much as we can or choose to.

Learning at least a bit of language will make the adjustment much easier! And again in my opinion it shows respect.

Is it absolutely necessary - no. YOu can always find someone to help you or interpret for you. But then again you are playing with fire sometimes......

Lambada your last comments were dead on. I now just seem to know what will actually happen. I don't get my knickers in a twist over the everyday common occurances. I save that for the really big issues.

 

[John Evans]

im not sure about the ignorant bit- some people have a better aptitude for language, some people have short term memory loss and of course some people cant be bothered but they are not all ignorant- some people just shout if they cant be understood- now thats ignorant lol. By the way I would never call a foreign person coming to England ignorant if they couldnt speak English

 

[Skippy1]

There does seem to be a double standard here in that a lot of Dominicans do not learn English in NY I have a mother in Law who has lived in NY for almost 40 years and can only say "Oh my God" and "Television" in English. She has to have everything translated and never worked a day in her life

Skippy1

 

[planner]

im not sure about the ignorant bit- some people have a better aptitude for language, some people have short term memory loss and of course some people cant be bothered but they are not all ignorant- some people just shout if they cant be understood- now thats ignorant lol. By the way I would never call a foreign person coming to England ignorant if they couldnt speak English

I didn't mean in that way John. there are those without aptitude, I know several. BUT they make an effort. They will say what they know how to say and that is at least something. Ignorant is for those who won't lower themselves to learn the language, that somehow because they speak English they are better then the locals. They sit in their apparent arrogance and demand that others cater to them. I have no respect for that attitude.

I applaud those who struggle to learn the language, who at least make the effort. And most locals will do the same.

Skippy, I know what you mean. Met a guy 3 years ago who wanted to date me. The guy spent 11 years in New York and didn't learn any English. Why the hell not???? To me it is not a double standard, it is not acceptable in either location!

 

[John Evans]

sorry about that - but im trying and failing- it must have hit a nerve- I dont think I will ever be able to converse in Spanish but I,m getting better at reading it

 

[Skippy1]

It will come

sorry about that - but im trying and failing- it must have hit a nerve- I dont think I will ever be able to converse in Spanish but I,m getting better at reading it

I have struggled to over the years to learn Spanish. My problem is my wife.....lol

Its true she speaks perfect English such that on the phone you would think she was English and I mean without an American accent either.
At my first mistake or wrongly emphasised syllabl she reverts to English and I loose all track of what I was trying to say. The only time I get a good run at it is when she (not often) looses her temper and curses in Spanish but then they are not the words I should be learning....lol

I am able to read a newspaper quite well and can even leave notes in Spanish.....Normally I come back to find all the verbs changed and the tenses altered in red pen but thats how I learn. I would shy away from conversation as I seem to have a poor ear for pronounciation and always get things back to front.

example Bachata song played here almost hourly

a line ......es tan dificil
for ages I thought it was estan dificil

Skippy1

 

[AK74]

I didn't mean in that way John. there are those without aptitude, I know several. BUT they make an effort. They will say what they know how to say and that is at least something. Ignorant is for those who won't lower themselves to learn the language, that somehow because they speak English they are better then the locals. They sit in their apparent arrogance and demand that others cater to them. I have no respect for that attitude.

I applaud those who struggle to learn the language, who at least make the effort. And most locals will do the same.

Skippy, I know what you mean. Met a guy 3 years ago who wanted to date me. The guy spent 11 years in New York and didn't learn any English. Why the hell not???? To me it is not a double standard, it is not acceptable in either location!

" Met a guy 3 years ago who wanted to date me. The guy spent 11 years in New York and didn't learn any English. " - Are you still with him? Or looking for a fresh start? Do you mean that DR1 community cannot be of any help?! Think twice!

 

[dv8]

i think about moving out every day. you know, small things :cheeky: like central hot water, central heating, 24/7 electricity. but now it's more like: "i miss my shower at home (sigh)" than "wtf, why there is no water, this f... country, this f... water, this f... edenorte".

i take things easy. i try to. i still have occasional bursts of anger at not having things done, at "ma?ana". i find out it helps if i shout, curse and rave a little. then i feel much better.

for instance, we sold our apartment and had to move to another one, above our farmacia where we will stay until our house is built (may take a while). it took two weeks to make apartment habitable (put in kitchen and fix the heater). i made a long and nasty speech sometime during the first week and now i just say "ok" to whatever delays we have. of course i still secretly swear a bit and i even cracked my rib moving the mahogany bed that was supposed to be moved days before.

i wish i'd have my dad here or at least his skills in plumbing, painting etc. i could do more myself and with less nerves.

i kinda fear to think about all the problems we will encounter when building our house since i have many "european style" ideas... :bunny:

as for the language - i wish i could speak more so i could make bitter and sarcastic comments to our workers :cheeky: (probably useless anyways) but i can communicate when i need to.

 

[lollipop]

Leaving? never. Many reasons but i'll give you 2.
1. I'm Dominican and speak Dominican so I have no communication issues.
2. I've lived overseas and whatever inconveniences DR has are way surpassed by it's benefits.

 

[Chirimoya]

i think about moving out every day. you know, small things :cheeky: like central hot water, central heating, 24/7 electricity. but now it's more like: "i miss my shower at home (sigh)" than "wtf, why there is no water, this f... country, this f... water, this f... edenorte".

i take things easy. i try to. i still have occasional bursts of anger at not having things done, at "ma?ana". i find out it helps if i shout, curse and rave a little. then i feel much better.

for instance, we sold our apartment and had to move to another one, above our farmacia where we will stay until our house is built (may take a while). it took two weeks to make apartment habitable (put in kitchen and fix the heater). i made a long and nasty speech sometime during the first week and now i just say "ok" to whatever delays we have. of course i still secretly swear a bit and i even cracked my rib moving the mahogany bed that was supposed to be moved days before.

i wish i'd have my dad here or at least his skills in plumbing, painting etc. i could do more myself and with less nerves.

i kinda fear to think about all the problems we will encounter when building our house since i have many "european style" ideas... :bunny:

Repeat after me: I'm only doing this to amuse my friends.

as for the language - i wish i could speak more so i could make bitter and sarcastic comments to our workers :cheeky: (probably useless anyways) but i can communicate when i need to.

Yeah, sarcastic comments, those really do get your point across here.

 

[dv8]

yes, chiri, you are right, my raves and horrible stories i email on daily basis are to amuse my friends, really.
i know dominicans would not recognize sarcasm even if slapped them in a face with a rotten platano but i can't stop myself...

 

[lollipop]

yes, chiri, you are right, my raves and horrible stories i email on daily basis are to amuse my friends, really.
i know dominicans would not recognize sarcasm even if slapped them in a face with a rotten platano but i can't stop myself...

That's the most ignorant, racist and retarded comment I've read in a long time.

Oh! and by the way, don't you dare to come and reply to me that you were joking or I didn't get you because my dear THIS Dominican understands sarcasm quite well.

 

[Funnyyale26]

Ay mama! DV8! Te acaban de mata' el gallo en la funda.

 

[Adrian Bye]

That's the most ignorant, racist and retarded comment I've read in a long time.

Oh! and by the way, don't you dare to come and reply to me that you were joking or I didn't get you because my dear THIS Dominican understands sarcasm quite well.

Get over yourself. UK sarcasm is quite different to here, but I doubt you know the difference.

 

[lollipop]

Get over yourself. UK sarcasm is quite different to here, but I doubt you know the difference.

:cheeky: Because you know me so well.

Thanks for pointing out an obvious subject (about Uk sarcasm vs Dominican).

Now, what does it has to do with the fact that her comment is ignorant and racist?

You know what? forget about it, I'm not derailing the thread from it's original subject any longer.

 

[Chris]

OK, let's remain on topic here .. 'Have you ever thought of leaving?'.
You have to understand dv8's sarcasm to get it. And if you don't understand basic cynicism, you won't get it - but that is not the topic here

 

[planner]

" Met a guy 3 years ago who wanted to date me. The guy spent 11 years in New York and didn't learn any English. " - Are you still with him? Or looking for a fresh start? Do you mean that DR1 community cannot be of any help?! Think twice!

Oh honey, I was never really with him at all..... I don't look to the DR1 community for that kind of help......

DV8 has her own very special brand of humour. She is Polish and English is her second language, then throw in Spanish and she at times comes out as a disaster. But she really does not mean things as badly as they come out.

She came here for "minovio" and only stays for him. She has clearly said she would much rather live elsewhere but stays for him.

By the way, she is not here to defend herself, she is on vacation - 2 weeks in Europe with "minovio" who is now "miesposo".

Back to topic - can't ever imagine leaving. BUT it is definately not for everyone. Actually not for most people in my opinion.