I get your point!
suarezn said:
As a person married to an American I can relate to this topic. When we first got married my wife did not understand why I had to send money, and buy all kinds of gifts for people when I went down there. The difference is I've always made my own money and never asked my wife to give a cent to anyone in my family and never would. So, since it is MY money I can do with it as I wish as long as I'm also taking care of my own household. That settled any potential arguments about this topic...
Now if a guy is making 110k a year what's the big deal about sending a coupel of hundred USD a month to help suppor the family back home. I do this with my grandfather every month, just as he supported me when I was growing up. The way I see it, if I don't spend it on him I would spend it on some other stupid thing. I could blow it on a party, drink it away, gamble it, etc...but I get a lot more pleasure from sending it to him and making sure he's not lacking basic necessities.
If I had a Dominican wife I would probably help as well, depending on the situation. What I wouldn't do is make it a habit where they come to expect this "monthly allowance" from their daughter's husband.
I, too, help a few people in the DR. Even my father who does not deserve it(but let's not get there). But I do it, as Frank Sinatra said "my way", when I want and if I want.
Suarezn, buddy, one thing is to help someone in need and another thing is make a habit out of it. You, as a Dominican, know for a fact that there are many people in the DR who would rather NOT work and wait for that monthly money.
Indeed, there are family members that one should help, no doubt about that, the problem is with those that expect you to help them and still NOT do anything to improve themselves.
I, for one, have been working VERY hard since the age of 11 and there's no way in hell that I am going to send my money to people that do not want to improve their way of living.
Yes, it's my money and I do with it as I please but let's not forget that, if you are married, in the US, your money is half your wife's and visa versa. Whether we like it or not, the spouse should have a saying in how one spend "our money".
What's the big deal if about a guy making 110k...?.:
Well, the big deal is that since he married down, he have been sending money to HER family, NOT his. If you go back and read my post, you will see that her 3 brothers are still living at home and are jobless. Do you know what's happening to the money that he is sending her parents?, the money is being spent on those 3 lowlives vagos also. And btw, 2 of them have 2 kids out of wedlock, each, living at the parent's home. Care to guess, since they don't work, with whose's money are they feeding those kids?. Exactly!.
Care to know why one her brothers cares very little for him?.
Because that prick called and told, not ask mind you, him to send him a Sidekick cell phone and my friend said "NO". All of a sudden, this moron who has been supported for a whole bunch of year by my buddy, tells whomever can hear that my buddy is the worse thing on the face of the earth. That cabron had gone as far as to tell his sister to dump him. Can you imagine, for her to dump the whole family meal ticket.
You, of all people, should know that when it comes to helping family members in the DR, in MANY cases, you are darned if you do and darned if you don't!.
One get's SOME of these people used to the idea that you will be sending them money, the moment you can't send it, they become your enemies and would say all kind of crap about you.
Would get mad if your abuelo tells you that with the money that you are sending him, that he is also "helping" support his 3 grandkids, kids that are about your own age?. I would.
aranoid:
