Who governs the police?

AZB

Platinum
Jan 2, 2002
12,288
519
113
To me it came across differently: not 'what's in it for me' but 'how much of a drag on my time & goodwill is this person going to be in the future'. There's a subtle difference. There are people whom you help once & then they learn to do it for themselves. No-one minds that. Then there are the sort you help once and..........you never get rid of them. Dependency syndrome. Just to give you an example - someone BushBaby had helped quite a bit phoned on a Sunday morning asking for the number of the British Embassy in SD. BB was on his way to golf. I was quite short & suggested they look in the phone book or online like everyone else would do. Being over helpful in the wrong way just encourages the type of dependency which an expat doesn't need because they need to learn to do it for themselves. Those of us who have learned to say 'no' are actually being kinder in the long run.

This is the difference between people who live here a long time and others who live her a short time or not live here at all. lambada knows exactly what i am talking about.,
AZB
 

SKing

Silver
Nov 22, 2007
3,750
183
63
shalena, i have spoken to you over the phone. I gather you as a good person. I think you should make an effort to come out and meet us when we invite you. I have invited you the last time in tino's house , but I understand it was not convenient for you. But please try to make it next time.
AZB
That I will. Thanks...
SHALENA
 

Irina1

New member
Mar 9, 2009
86
4
0
its clear that (azb) is trying to help the OP...just going about it in a different way..
 

Chip

Platinum
Jul 25, 2007
16,772
430
0
Santiago
Good for you. This is the best way to go. Its not like I have to pay for my favors. My friends already owe me favors as I am the first one to help people. Its a totally differently situation when I need a favor for myself, and another thing when I call on a government official to help someone I do not know personally. This is when they they send me their aunt to my clinic for free care.
I often spend hours fixing friends' pcs while they are sleeping or drinking beers outside. I often get the short end of the deal when helping someone. I just got a call from a friend of a friend to help him out on his voip telephone system. This is exactly what i do not want to do. I help them set it up, then they have trouble later and then they call me day and night to give them tech-support. remember, I do this for free in the first place and then I have to spend more days fixing and maintaining their system for free again. tell me, would any one of you do this for me? No, you are too busy. I can't think of anyone except rocky and maybe another couple of people who would spend days fixing my pc for free. No way a stranger would even look my way if I needed help. I was in atlanta and fixed 3 laptops. tough cases: 1 : crushed LCD and wifi issues. I reinstalled windows and driver and replaced LCD. the whole thing took me 2 days as I had trouble getting the right drivers to work with the hardware. the wrong driver froze my windows and had to do a total reinstall. I know, it sounds easy but it didn't happen so easily. I got it to work.
The other laptop also had LCD issues (hardware). needed to change the LCD inverter and flexible connector. thanks god I had exactly the same broken laptop for parts. the 3rd one had to have power DC jack replaced on the mother board. For that, you need to take apart everything and take out the motherboard. not for anyone to handle a task like this. de-solder the old jack and put in the new one. Thanks god for e bay.
I did all this for free and spent 3 days on the whole project. You think anyone of you guys would have sacrificed you vacation on repairing other people's pcs for free? I doubt that very much. This is why I have good friends and this is why they help me when I need help. I know I will not win any real friends if all I have to offer is free beers.
By the way, after repairing 2 laptops for one person, this kid offered me a iphone (free). I will get it soon from him. remember, this gift was promised to me after he saw me spend so much time on his laptops and asking nothing in return. You get what you put out. this is how the laws of nature work.
I will enjoy my 3g iphone soon.
AZB

Good for you too Aftab. As far as helping people I too do it and have done it for many years pro bono with no thought of any reward except maybe for some good fortune from above one day.

Also, as for the favors that require a third party, most have been "de confianza" or family and actually do not require any tip at all, rather than a small token of appreciation. I understand that you didn't have this option as you don't have family here as we do in Cibao so it would take more work on your part.
 

Lambada

Gold
Mar 4, 2004
9,478
410
0
80
www.ginniebedggood.com
This is the difference between people who live here a long time and others who live her a short time or not live here at all. lambada knows exactly what i am talking about., AZB

Yes I do. I think after being here about 10 or 12 years, sharing your experience & helping others, frequently with problems they have brought on themselves (either through ignorance, arrogance or stupidity) you go through a wall when you say 'enough is enough'. And the other side of that wall is a quieter, more peaceful place with fewer interruptions. I will still help people I know, who didn't bring the problem on themselves and who don't act as if they're entitled to assistance. It's that sense of entitlement which I perceive as becoming more common, unfortunately.

Sometimes people post an issue on here & some of us do things in the background to try to ameliorate the situation. Sometimes without telling the person who raised the problem because there is no need for thanks. And of course the person with the problem, who might not know how many folks have been communicating with each other in order to assist with the issue, is free to reject any advice given. But those people are also free to say 'I tried' and walk away. Permanently.
 

liam1

Bronze
Jun 9, 2004
843
30
28
The saddest part of all is that one needs friends in high places to be treated justly and fairly by the "legal" system here. One needs to suck up to a colonel (or whomever) and kiss his ass constantly "just in case". It is sad when one man with a high ranking post is more powerful than all the DR laws ever written, he can by-pass them all and he is judge and the jury. :tired:
 

Chip

Platinum
Jul 25, 2007
16,772
430
0
Santiago
The saddest part of all is that one needs friends in high places to be treated justly and fairly by the "legal" system here. One needs to suck up to a colonel (or whomever) and kiss his ass constantly "just in case".

An exxageration to say the least.

It is sad when one man with a high ranking post is more powerful than all the DR laws ever written, he can by-pass them all and he is judge and the jury. :tired:

Not an exxageration unfortunately - but not as exploited as much as what many may believe, but still a lot more according to our Western sensibilities.
 

liam1

Bronze
Jun 9, 2004
843
30
28
If you are a restaurant owner and a colonel comes to eat at your place many will give him the lunch for free, "just in case" you need him later on. If you know how to fix PCs you will fix his for free "just in case" you need him later on. If you are a TV tech you will fix his TV for free... nothing but sucking up and kissing his ass, and why, because he can by-pass the laws and knows people. For some "civilians" it works for some the whole concept is absurd, but that is the way it is, take it or leave it. One thing is for sure, the system works for the colonels.
 

donP

Newbie
Dec 14, 2008
6,942
178
0
Big Step

_ For some "civilians" it works for some the whole concept is absurd

It's always said that the DR is not for everyone.
It certainly is not paradise for upright people who believe in justice and democratic institutions.
I've come to the conclusion that it helps a lot if you have lived in places like Pakistan, India, Russia (insert long list here), even Italy... :cheeky:
Stepping in from intact civilisation is just a step too big.
 

AZB

Platinum
Jan 2, 2002
12,288
519
113
It's always said that the DR is not for everyone.
It certainly is not paradise for upright people who believe in justice and democratic institutions.
I've come to the conclusion that it helps a lot if you have lived in places like Pakistan, India, Russia (insert long list here), even Italy... :cheeky:
Stepping in from intact civilisation is just a step too big.

I agree, DR is not for everyone. If you want law and order, then move to iceland or even canada.
I do not see making friends in higher ranks as kissing ass. People fail to realize, when you are friends with the right type of people, you get nothing but benefits out of them. remember, these people are rich and have huge houses with swimming pools and have regular parties etc. In order to have a good fiesta they have to invite the right type of people. So you get to enjoy the free goodies their friendship has to offer. This is why I have a diverse variety of friends, all are not in need of my money or are even impressed by my lifestyle. if you folks look back at my pictures on dr1, you will notice I have been invited to huge parties and gatherings in the most exotic places on this island. If I want to spend a nice quiet weekend, all I have to do is go to jarabacoa and stay in a huge mansion with pool and jacuzzi. all for free. If I need a favor, I make a call and all is settled. many of these powerful people do not need a thing from you. If they like you, they will give you all they have to offer you. But I do take care of my friends and do not abuse their kindness. I do not talk or think like Liam. This type of thinking will bore out even the most friendliest person on this island. Come to think of it, some people are too innocent to be living here and too boring as friends. they are just too politically correct and afraid to speak their minds. I just can't stand people who are P.C all the time, make neutral statements just to appease everyone around them. So boring. I will say things, just the way I think they are and put a bit of humorous twist in it. make people laugh and entertain them. This is the perfect recipe to get invited to their parties over and over again. No one like a nice but a boring person.
I do not see my friendship with anyone as a form of ass kissing. I like being with people and like entertaining them. I love to feed my friends and help them in need. Now this is totally different from solving other people's problems who , sometimes, bring it upon themselves from the beginning.
AZB
 

SKing

Silver
Nov 22, 2007
3,750
183
63
Thank you guys
Moderator, if you are reading, this thread may be closed as I have the answer to my initial question and now I am just getting ****ed off. I'd hate to put my Rabiosa face back on.
Now, if you guys don't mind, I'm going to find a General and rock his world with my Morena cocomordan in hopes that he will help me get the police off my a**.
But of course, we all know that I asked for all of this, according to some people.
SHALENA
 

BushBaby

Silver
Jan 1, 2002
3,829
329
0
79
www.casabush.org
Thank you guys
Moderator, if you are reading, this thread may be closed as I have the answer to my initial question and now I am just getting ****ed off. I'd hate to put my Rabiosa face back on.
Now, if you guys don't mind, I'm going to find a General and rock his world with my Morena cocomordan in hopes that he will help me get the police off my a**.
But of course, we all know that I asked for all of this, according to some people.
SHALENA
SHALENA - so as to facilitate a much better welcome with the Coronel, General, Chief of Police, or any other dignitaries, PLEASE leave the 'ATTITUDE' at home when you go.

Instead of 'rocking his/her world (remember there ARE some important & influential women on this island too!!) with your 'Moreno Cocmordan', try baking up a BIG cake with your own hands, Buying a BIG pizza (or two or twenty) & walk into the police station/army barracks/Governors place bearing gifts. Dominicans think with their stomachs as well as European/North American men you know!! When there, try to pay attention to what HIS/HER likes are, note the 'little things' that give an indication of any interests/hobbies they may have & then at sometime in the future buy (or make) a little gift that shows you have thought of him/her for MORE than the few moments you are in his/her office! Do You get the drift? :chinese: :bunny: :bunny: :ermm:

Why should an important thread on attitudes & cultural practices in this country be closed? The information contained in this thread should be very helpful to other 'newbies' that are trying to settle themselves in this country. YOU may not like the on-going responses but WE do not put our responses here JUST for you - we like to consider other readers too & (generally) include ways to avert problems for them too. This post, this thread, this BOARD is for all readers & not just YOU. :chinese: ~ Grahame.
 

donP

Newbie
Dec 14, 2008
6,942
178
0
The Icing on the Cake

_ baking up a BIG cake with your own hands, Buying a BIG pizza (or two or twenty) & walk into the police station/army barracks/Governors place bearing gifts. __ When there, try to pay attention to what HIS/HER likes are, note the 'little things' that give an indication of any interests/hobbies they may have & then at sometime in the future buy (or make) a little gift that shows you have thought of him/her for MORE than the few moments you are in his/her office!

You mean feeding the bas...ds will get you anywhere?
All right, after they saved your life but just to civilize them???
What an advice!
 

BushBaby

Silver
Jan 1, 2002
3,829
329
0
79
www.casabush.org
You mean feeding the bas...ds will get you anywhere?
All right, after they saved your life but just to civilize them???
What an advice!
:cheeky: :cheeky: :cheeky: :cheeky:

If you ain't done it DonP, don't knock it! ;) :surprised! It certainly has worked for me in the past & as I am sure AZB will confirm it is not always the EXPENSIVE thoughts that get you noticed & remembered ;) :pirate:

A 50 pence (very nearly US $1.00 in those days) hand sized beanbag frog bought in the UK & then handed over here with loads of others looking on for double effect, has had pride of place on ONE persons desk for almost 16 years!! Old Hawk-eyes had noticed all the other little frog items this guy had had on his desk so when I saw something IN ENGLAND that would add to his collection, I bought it (last of the big spenders me!!). Oh, ............ & he STILL greets me like a long lost primo when we meet in the street or in his office!!

Little THOUGHTFUL things can make you stand out against the big, obvious 'buying a favour' gift or 'palm greaser'. ~ Grahame.
 

juanita

Bronze
Apr 22, 2004
1,893
115
0
57
Funny, just last Saturday I was baking some banana muffins to take to a School Director I was going to visit to get some free advice on a project of mine. She received me at her house for 2 hours, sharing with me some very important information and much needed contacts. So there ya go!!!
 

AZB

Platinum
Jan 2, 2002
12,288
519
113
I once got a person released from puerto plata police station just by feeding them indian samosas. hehehehe. it worked.
AZB