- Thread starter carterkerrie
- Start date
The new guy
jmb & tonto - both of you know that I never speak poorly of "all" Dominicans and am usually quick to speak up against anyone who does. And yes even against you once jmb.
I don't believe every Dominican is a scammer but I'd be an idiot to say none are. I never said something like this isn't common and I wouldn't want the OP to be naive. Maybe he has a good girl but he is questioning a very specific behavior so we need to respond with our take on that behavior.
I think most of the responses in this thread have been good. Some have had poor choices of words but the concept is clear.
First, the OP clearly has some suspicions/questions, otherwise he would not have posted in the first place. Putting it into perspective my wife and I typically spend US $75/wk on groceries for a two person household. My wife doesn't eat much but I definitely make up for it. And this covers everything except the two times a week on average that we eat out.
Of course, this is typical Dominican meals, rice, beans, meat and fruit or salad most of the time but we mix in American cooking a couple of meals a week. So yes, if you don't eat like that you will spend more than $75. But $200 is still high. Also, I suspect if you buy everything at Jumbo or a similar store and don't actually shop at the small Dominican markets tucked away inside of the neighborhoods then you will spend more too. But again, $200 is a long way from $75.
Another question would be what is meant by "other household items". Is that just cleaning supplies that you pick up at the market or is that bills and part of the rent too.
So those are things the OP can think about. Where does she shop, what type of food does she eat and what is meant by "other household items". Not saying my expenses are right or wrong, just putting them out there for comparison as others did. IMO, that is really what the OP is asking.
I don't believe every Dominican is a scammer but I'd be an idiot to say none are. I never said something like this isn't common and I wouldn't want the OP to be naive. Maybe he has a good girl but he is questioning a very specific behavior so we need to respond with our take on that behavior.
I think most of the responses in this thread have been good. Some have had poor choices of words but the concept is clear.
First, the OP clearly has some suspicions/questions, otherwise he would not have posted in the first place. Putting it into perspective my wife and I typically spend US $75/wk on groceries for a two person household. My wife doesn't eat much but I definitely make up for it. And this covers everything except the two times a week on average that we eat out.
Of course, this is typical Dominican meals, rice, beans, meat and fruit or salad most of the time but we mix in American cooking a couple of meals a week. So yes, if you don't eat like that you will spend more than $75. But $200 is still high. Also, I suspect if you buy everything at Jumbo or a similar store and don't actually shop at the small Dominican markets tucked away inside of the neighborhoods then you will spend more too. But again, $200 is a long way from $75.
Another question would be what is meant by "other household items". Is that just cleaning supplies that you pick up at the market or is that bills and part of the rent too.
So those are things the OP can think about. Where does she shop, what type of food does she eat and what is meant by "other household items". Not saying my expenses are right or wrong, just putting them out there for comparison as others did. IMO, that is really what the OP is asking.
It's not so much about hating. The odds are that he is just throwing his money away. So why not make him aware of it?
We all need to relax..I have 2 D.R. men and 3 D.R. women right now in my casa..We are talking about this post..They are all laughting..All of them are saying he is a very stupid man..He thinks he is a good man but he is a puta and D.R. women like there money but have No respect for a puta..I am only writing what they are all saying..They all say they can eat very good for 1500 pesos a week with a baby..(very good) They all say they are dominican and do not really like our food..Right now the girls are cooking for us..Rice,chicken, and platano..(bananas) I just went and bought the food..oh and a big bottle of coke..422peso
JMB ... I am planning a business trip to Chicago. I will be dressed in a business suit at all times when I am out and about. I will also be carrying plenty of cash, to buy little things that I need when I go into the stores, or grab a bite to eat.
For about a week, I plan to be walking all over the south-side, at all hours of the night. What are some good places to get some good grub?
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And if you give me ANY advice ... it might not be any different than what others are doing here ......
(FYI -- I know better than to do the above.)
Okay You will be the only man downtown Chicago with a business suit LOL
You can bring in as much cash as you want, but be aware Chicago Ohare International are some of the TOUGEST people you will deal with in customs and they will SEIZED that money and you as well until the Chicago Police Dept buys your story on the reason why you are carrying so much money through their city.
Barak Obama is from the southside, the southside of Chicago is a very large area and it is home to our Mexican, Irish, and one of many African American communities. Do you want soul food, Mexican food, or some cornbeef and cabbage.
An old man in a suit walking around the southside of Chicago will be the safest person in the world because people will just think " they let you out of a mental hospital" and your just a crazy old man in a suit LOL and after seeing you for a whole week people will start too get nervous and they will call the police because some man from DR is roaming the streets of Chicago for no reason. Then the police will come and just move you to another area like the northside.
I bet you any money in the world if you walked toward a group of Mexicans or African Americans on the southside they would be 10 times more afraid of you then you could ever be of them.
Notice I never said you were a :
A drug dealer for having all that money
A man looking to rape women on the southside
A man looking to kidnapp a child on southside
A man looking to boost cars on the southside
I never got into any business of your unless you provided that info. The OP NEVER once mention one thing about his girl other then he gives her 200USD a week and he had doubts maybe it might be a lot. Using him for his money was not INFO he provided in his OP. That is my point.
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But as someone added, would his posting the question here lead one to believe he himself has been questioning the amount. For 99% of the posters here have stated, in there own way, that the stipend or support money is much more than what is typically required in the DR for a family consisting of an adult and 1 child.
The OP has not indicated how much rent is paid but more than 6k-7k a month is manageble, and even a tad high, for a single woman to be able to manage on her own (prior the OP). Additonally, $800US is usually more than a mid-level wage earner has to pay in child support for HIS own child on a monthly basis.
But as someone stated he should have her checked out, if only for his own piece of mind, if not, after this forum he WILL be questioning her requirements.
In order to give "tough love" you have to infact have some sort of connection to the person your giving tough love to otherwise you come off as a "hater" like yourself. You do not know the OP from ADAM but you feel compell to offer him tough love POR QUE???? is he your uncle, brother, dad, grandfather nephew???
You know ONE SIDE of the story, you know how much is coming in but have no clue on what is going out, so how can you give the OP a definitive answer without knowing anything about her cost of living???
As for the OP being "smart enough" he can't be to sharp if he has no idea what his soon to be wife is spenting 800USD per month on and thinking posters on DR1 have the answers to his problem when they have no idea what is the problem.
BTW pauleast You couldn't hate on me even if I told you it was okay to do so.:smoke:
Fair enough ... your opinion. But others might advise me differently. And I should expect it (based on THEIR perspective and experiences).
No one person has all the answers. But if you take the average from the group ..........
to the men on here ~how many of your buddies back home (Canada...u.s...wherever ur from...) do you know just give their gf's hundreds of dollars to support themselves....??? probably not many...so why do men feel the need to send their gf's in another country money when they don't even have a clue what they are really doing with the money????....I actually feel bad for u guys...or should I say "suckers"
From what I can tell, guys opt to paying rent and having their girl stay there, rather than going and spending money in a hotel and restaurant. When and if ****z hits the fan, they stop paying rent and keep it moving. In the U.S. guys have a girl and spend hunreds a month on going out, because seriously, how many chicks abroad are going to give it up, unless the guy is not spending money somehow: Whether it's on going to nice restaurants, bars, events, clothes, drugs or something else.
So it's a blind faith thing, somewhat playing house. So if you're not sure who you're playing house with, over 6-7 years with the girl, it's obviously tomfoolery (sucker) behavior.
Fair enough ... your opinion. But others might advise me differently. And I should expect it (based on THEIR perspective and experiences).
No one person has all the answers. But if you take the average from the group ..........
Its all good.
This is my opinion on the OP. I think he is a bit tired of supporting a woman and a child that is not his. A man will at some point get a bit tired of supporting a woman if she is not bringing anything to the table, it is human nature.
If a man gets involved with a woman with a child or children make sure this is what they truely wants.
BTW The OP wants out of this situtation but needs fuel to go forward and some of you gave him just what he was looking for. I knew this the moment I read his post.
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