5 Things I Learned From Ilana Benady's Dominican Culture Book.

[bob saunders]

I know plenty of people who don?t let their kids dress up go to go a carnival or to a Halloween party because these are things from the Devil. They tell them that if they do so they will go to hell, but the funny thing is that they often encourage their kids to lie and steal and don?t mind letting them experience questionable behavior.

LOL. We are having Carnival day at school tomorrow. Kids can dress like their favorite devil as long as they are not under-dressed.

 

[Redscot]

My experience is that most churchgoers are hypocrites in one form or another especially them so called reborn Christians. When I just arrived here in the DR several employees of mine were reborn. My first impression was, GREAT nice honest, hardworking and humble people. What a let down it turned out to be!!! Got rid of them real quick. Will NEVER hire a reborn again!!

Unfortunately in my 8 years of doing business in the country I have had a similar experience. Almost invariably the clients who want to wave their holier than thou flags are the mala paga's. Everything is amen, amen, except it seems their god doesn't believe in honoring your commitments. Many people use the name of God as a cloaking device which frees them and absolves them from playing by the rules of the sinners.

 

[caribmike]

Unfortunately I made the same experience. Had to fire 3 of them for cheating...

My experience is that most churchgoers are hypocrites in one form or another especially them so called reborn Christians. When I just arrived here in the DR several employees of mine were reborn. My first impression was, GREAT nice honest, hardworking and humble people. What a let down it turned out to be!!! Got rid of them real quick. Will NEVER hire a reborn again!!

 

[Castle]

Almost invariably the clients who want to wave their holier than thou flags are the mala paga's. Everything is amen, amen, except it seems their god doesn't believe in honoring your commitments.

They believe in God just because they don't know God doesn't believe in them any more....

 

[suarezn]

My experience is that most churchgoers are hypocrites in one form or another especially them so called reborn Christians. When I just arrived here in the DR several employees of mine were reborn. My first impression was, GREAT nice honest, hardworking and humble people. What a let down it turned out to be!!! Got rid of them real quick. Will NEVER hire a reborn again!!

Amen brother...and you should have added "not just in The DR, but everywhere in the world".

The OP is right on point. Should also be noted that to the typical Dominican loyalty is more important than honesty.

 

[windeguy]

Unfortunately in my 8 years of doing business in the country I have had a similar experience. Almost invariably the clients who want to wave their holier than thou flags are the mala paga's. Everything is amen, amen, except it seems their god doesn't believe in honoring your commitments. Many people use the name of God as a cloaking device which frees them and absolves them from playing by the rules of the sinners.

They are just excercsing free will. The free will to screw you while saying they believe in nonsense.

 

[dv8]

LOL. We are having Carnival day at school tomorrow. Kids can dress like their favorite devil as long as they are not under-dressed.

children, it is fine to worship satan as long as your nipples are covered. now go.

 

[Castle]

children, it is fine to worship satan as long as your nipples are covered. now go.

...or at least as long as you get some money from him to help the family, you know...

 

[JMB773]

I finished reading this book a few days ago, and I finally got some time to post a review/analysis of it here on DR1:

Dominican Republic - Culture Smart!: The Essential Guide to Customs & Culture: Ginnie Bedggood, Ilana Benady: 9781857335279: Amazon.com: Books

I highly recommend this book and I've rated it 5 out of 5 stars. I rarely give books a perfect score but in this case I will make an exception......because it is a masterpiece. I can't find anything negative to say about this book, and it is an excellent guide for tourists and expatriates alike. I started this thread because I wanted to show, contrary to what some members here on DR1 believe, that the DR is a country of rules and laws, many of which are unspoken and unwritten. Gaining insights from a book like this will go a long way towards ensuring your stay in the DR is a pleasant one.

My Review and Analysis

When I moved to the DR, I knew the country was different from the U.S., but this book showed that the DR is far different than I originally thought. In fact, the author shows that the DR, in many ways, has more in common with Japan and other East Asian societies than its large neighbor to the north. Why do I say this? For one, the author shows that Dominican society, unlike American society, is collectivist. For those of you who aren't familiar with the term, collectivism simply means a system where the group is more important than the individual. Most Americans reading this know full well that the USA is the opposite of a collectivist society, at least traditionally. The USA was founded on the principle of individualism and is thus the polar opposite of the DR. Japan, by contrast, is also a collectivist society where the group supersedes the individual. This was the first thing I learned from reading this book.

1. The Dominicans, Like the Japanese, have a concept of Face

Face is very important in Dominican society, and shares similarities with Japan. Dominicans don't like to lose face, so wise expatriates and tourists must learn how to ensure this doesn't happen.

2. The Dominican Republic is Essentially a Smoke Free Zone

This book revealed that smoking in public is taboo, and not done by Dominicans. This makes the DR distinct from Cuba and other Caribbean islands so smokers should be mindful of this.

3. Like the Japanese, Dominicans do not perform PDA(Public Displays of Affection)

Since I've been in the DR, I've rarely seen couples walking the street holding hands, or kissing and making out. This book revealed why. The Dominicans are again similar to the Japanese in that public displays of affection are frowned upon. So to visitors to the country, don't be surprised if you try to kiss or hold hands with your significant other, and they choose not to do so(this actually happened to me and I didn't know why at the time, since I hadn't read this book).

4. Charm and Connections are More Important than Knowledge When it Comes to Doing Business in the DR

In the DR, it isn't what you know, it is who you know. If you're a foreigner without local connections, your ability to charm will be more important than your knowledge.

5. Dominicans are very religious and spiritual, with a strong belief in God. If you don't hold such beliefs, keep them to yourself. If you're an atheist, never tell a Dominican.

I'm not religious(unless you consider making money to be a religion), and I'm indifferent to the existence
of God. However, this book taught me(I suspect the author is also non-religious), that if you hold such views, keep quiet about it. If a Dominican asks you about religion(they've asked me about it), never say more than you need to. You don't have to lie, but don't tell them you don't believe in anything. Keep your responses vague.

Connections are common all over the world, if you made Qatar your home I bet connection help you out there as well. I do not know of any countries where "connections" do not play a major role.

Dominicans SMOKE not all but enough, they sell "cancer sticks" all over DR

Now for my reason for posting I have heard Japanese people being compared to a couple of different people, but I must say I NEVER EVER witness any reason to put Japanese people in the same sentence with Dominican people LOL These two group of people couldn't be MORE different if they tried.

Just look at the two countries diet and if that does not sum it up I don't know what will. Japanese people are some of the most DISCIPLINE people on earth, Dominicans HMMMM!!!! not so much.

If you look at baseball a sport that the DR supposely thrive in Japanese players are much BETTER even at a young age like little league. Dominicans are STRIKE OUT KINGS, but Japanese are all contact hitters, if you put Japan in a Series with Mexico, PR, Dominican Republic and Japan, the ball players of Japan will clean Dominicans clock every year.

OP I liked and agree with your post, but you lost me with the word "Japanese" in your OP.

BTW People in the Middle East like India, Iran, Syria etc NEVER show affection in public because they can't, but in DR those jokers love the whole touchy lovey, dovey BS.

 

[JMB773]

Amen brother...and you should have added "not just in The DR, but everywhere in the world".

The OP is right on point. Should also be noted that to the typical Dominican loyalty is more important than honesty.

So your saying Dominicans are loyal to one another? Very interesting.

 

[the gorgon]

So your saying Dominicans are loyal to one another? Very interesting.

i do not know if it is loyalty, in the true sense of the word. however, they will join forces with each other against another ethnicity. i posted before that i never had any doubts when i hung with my PR buddies, because i always knew that if crap jumped off, my boricua friends would fight other boricuas, because they are my friends. if i was with Dominicans, and things got ugly out there with other Dominicans, they would take sides with their brethren, and i would end up having to scrap with all of them, including the guys i stepped out with. if they took my side against their compatriots, they would feel as if they had sold out the flag.

 

[suarezn]

So your saying Dominicans are loyal to one another? Very interesting.

I said Dominicans value loyalty more than honesty...Don't ever expect a Dominican to side with you over let's say another Dominican. Don't ever expect your Dominican wife's family to side with you even if she's a lying, conniving, thieving b!tch...the best that could happen is they will advice her to take it easy on you if you're a really nice person. Example...don't ever expect any of her relatives to tell you she's cheating on or stealing from you, because they're loyal to HER not you.

Puerto Ricans on the other hand are neither loyal nor honest...I know, I know...gre:gre:gre:gre:gre: Hey I can say that...I have Puerto Rican relatives.

 

[JMB773]

I said Dominicans value loyalty more than honesty...Don't ever expect a Dominican to side with you over let's say another Dominican. Don't ever expect your Dominican wife's family to side with you even if she's a lying, conniving, thieving b!tch...the best that could happen is they will advice her to take it easy on you if you're a really nice person. Example...don't ever expect any of her relatives to tell you she's cheating on or stealing from you, because they're loyal to HER not you.

Puerto Ricans on the other hand are neither loyal nor honest...I know, I know...gre:gre:gre:gre:gre: Hey I can say that...I have Puerto Rican relatives.

I NEVER want dishonest person loyal to me, because sooner or later it all will catch up to him and if you and he are friends Good Luck.

I now understand you meant when an expat or tourist is part of the equation.

I was born and raised with that saying" Birds of a Feather" planted into my mental, so I am way ahead with her family sticking up for her.

 

[the gorgon]

I said Dominicans value loyalty more than honesty...Don't ever expect a Dominican to side with you over let's say another Dominican. Don't ever expect your Dominican wife's family to side with you even if she's a lying, conniving, thieving b!tch...the best that could happen is they will advice her to take it easy on you if you're a really nice person. Example...don't ever expect any of her relatives to tell you she's cheating on or stealing from you, because they're loyal to HER not you.

Puerto Ricans on the other hand are neither loyal nor honest...I know, I know...gre:gre:gre:gre:gre: Hey I can say that...I have Puerto Rican relatives.

well, i am fortunate in not having met your relatives. all the PRs i have associated with in my life have been loyal. i have dealt with some rough boricuas, who have done things that are not exactly praiseworthy, but i knew they would not jack me. they saw me as i friend, and i was not to be messed with. i know too many guys in the DR who have had "friends " who come to their houses to socialize, and break into it later when they are not around.

 

[mountainannie]

i am constantly amazed how many guys end up with lying theiving bitches/// is that the opinion of Dominicans or expats?

seems that there should be at least fifty percent good women here

i mean... really?

 

[Aguaita29]

i do not know if it is loyalty, in the true sense of the word. however, they will join forces with each other against another ethnicity. i posted before that i never had any doubts when i hung with my PR buddies, because i always knew that if crap jumped off, my boricua friends would fight other boricuas, because they are my friends. if i was with Dominicans, and things got ugly out there with other Dominicans, they would take sides with their brethren, and i would end up having to scrap with all of them, including the guys i stepped out with. if they took my side against their compatriots, they would feel as if they had sold out the flag.

I actually think that us Dominicans are not very supportive of each other. I hardly ever see a Dominican taking sides with another Dominican over someone else just because of ethnicity. Taking sides with someone usually comes because, besides being a fellow Dominican, the other person is your family, close friend, or both your families go way back. Maybe these people you hung out with didn?t have your back not because you were a gringo, but just because they were not loyal people, period!

 

[Redscot]

i am constantly amazed how many guys end up with lying theiving bitches/// is that the opinion of Dominicans or expats?

seems that there should be at least fifty percent good women here

i mean... really?

Me too Annie. I see it more as an insight into the dudes here and the type of gals they attract/settle for. There are gold diggers everywhere, but sometimes when I read the threads here I think I live in an alternate DR universe.

 

[the gorgon]

I actually think that us Dominicans are not very supportive of each other. I hardly ever see a Dominican taking sides with another Dominican over someone else just for ethnicity. Taking sides with someone usually comes because, besides being a fellow Dominican, the other person is your family, close friend, or both your families go way back. Maybe these people you hung out with didn?t have your back not because you were a gringo, but just because they were not loyal people, period!

maybe true. however, as i posted before, i was once attacked by a drugged out Dominican with a machete one night. he attacked me, with no warning. the very Dominicans with whom i was conversing at the time just stood there and watched the guy try to kill me. had it been a situation in which i was hanging with my PR friends, and a crazy PR attacked me, i can assure you that they would have kicked his ass so hard he would have been wearing it for a hat.

 

[the gorgon]

I actually think that us Dominicans are not very supportive of each other. I hardly ever see a Dominican taking sides with another Dominican over someone else just because of ethnicity. Taking sides with someone usually comes because, besides being a fellow Dominican, the other person is your family, close friend, or both your families go way back. Maybe these people you hung out with didn?t have your back not because you were a gringo, but just because they were not loyal people, period!

ok, Aguita, tell me why it is that if a gringo gets into a vehicle accident with a Dominican, the crowd always sides with their fellow Dominican, even if they did not even witness the accident, and it is obvious that the gringo was not liable?

 

[bob saunders]

I said Dominicans value loyalty more than honesty...Don't ever expect a Dominican to side with you over let's say another Dominican. Don't ever expect your Dominican wife's family to side with you even if she's a lying, conniving, thieving b!tch...the best that could happen is they will advice her to take it easy on you if you're a really nice person. Example...don't ever expect any of her relatives to tell you she's cheating on or stealing from you, because they're loyal to HER not you.

Puerto Ricans on the other hand are neither loyal nor honest...I know, I know...gre:gre:gre:gre:gre: Hey I can say that...I have Puerto Rican relatives.

Really? My wife's cousin in Santo Domingo told us not to trust her oldest son with anything at any time. She said he was a lying thief that would rob a grave. Her other children she was complimentary about. I've come to trust her judgement on other things as well. More than once she has stopped me from making a social faux pas, or warned us about a area to stay away from or dishonest merchants....etc.