- Thread starter AZB
- Start date
Gringa/sankie, even in santiago :(
- Status
You sound surprised, if you're a good wife (and I assume you are), who else would he love? .... besides, he better 'toe the party line', otherwise, he's out on his keisters.
And IMAO that's NOT enough time give it at least 3-5 years. If not then you will included under the 1%.
I personally know a couple where, she was like 30 something years older than him, she brought him here from the DR. And after 4 years he left her, because he was 25 and all of a sudden began to have desires of having children and she obviously was way past her child bearing years and He cheated on her . :bunny:
MQ - I want to make sure you know I was not referring to you! I am talking about what people perceive and assume.
It is interesting for me as the man I am dating looks older then me or I look younger then him...... one or the other. We dont get that look from people at all. But we are aware that people are watching and judging us all the time! And it never stops.... and they all seem to know everything.......
It is interesting for me as the man I am dating looks older then me or I look younger then him...... one or the other. We dont get that look from people at all. But we are aware that people are watching and judging us all the time! And it never stops.... and they all seem to know everything.......
planner is right on !!!
after soon to be 1 year living here and living with my dominican boyfriend here in puerto plata 1 thing I dislike the most is the assumption of everyone can make because I am a gringa with a dominican. we keep low profile everytime when we are outside the house. I speak spanish so I have hear many thing I don t really like about your relation 1 I do remember is one time at tropical when my boyfriend was paying the grocery (+ou-3500 rd) two man was behind us talking together about how gringa girl give their money for their boyfriend can pay so everything look good !!!!! I was RED I wanted to turn back and tell him what I think about is assumption and that was not our case. but you know why lose my time with this ...I learn to live with that.
but other thing I don t like but really don t like its other foreigner who live here looking up at us and trust me that we have that more often that dominican can do.
after soon to be 1 year living here and living with my dominican boyfriend here in puerto plata 1 thing I dislike the most is the assumption of everyone can make because I am a gringa with a dominican. we keep low profile everytime when we are outside the house. I speak spanish so I have hear many thing I don t really like about your relation 1 I do remember is one time at tropical when my boyfriend was paying the grocery (+ou-3500 rd) two man was behind us talking together about how gringa girl give their money for their boyfriend can pay so everything look good !!!!! I was RED I wanted to turn back and tell him what I think about is assumption and that was not our case. but you know why lose my time with this ...I learn to live with that.
but other thing I don t like but really don t like its other foreigner who live here looking up at us and trust me that we have that more often that dominican can do.
I was once invited to a DJ style dance party in a moca bar. The entrance was very high but we were able to get in for free because my friend was doing rum promotions in the disco. I knew with this high price and no live band, no one would show. This turned out to true. Then I hear a gringa talking to the sankie looking doorman in english. Next thing I know, the doorman gets upset and tells her to "shut up, I didn't know it either, I will fix it....go away...do something else and leave me alone...blah blah...." the gringa came back almost crying. Then they fought again in the bar. He told her to go serve some free shots to people. Then the doorman went back and really dropped his entrance fees so people could come and he did get a few people in.'
The gringa was seen crying at some point. So my dominican friend pulls me to the side and fills me on the details.
this is what he told me:
He said, this "pendeja" (this sucker) the girl is the one who put up all the money because her "sankie/pankie" (the dominican boyfriend/doorman) told her they could make a ton of money if she throws a party in moca. What she didn't know is that the sankie is a dummy, no education and no brain. He put such an high entrance of 500 pesos / person to enter and listen to music? hahahaha, No one would go there unless some top name DJ or perhaps Tono rosario was playing there. People turned away from the door so finally at around 12:30am he reduced the price so people would come in, but this was done a bit too late. I counted like maybe 15 paying customers inside. The gringa was slightly overweight but still could have been taken for a hottie back in USA or Canada. The guy was 100% tigre. He was pushing her around and yelling at her as if it was his money they were losing. The gringa had met the guy in some hotel, he was a hotel worker but he was from some campo near moca. So thats why he came up with this brillient idea of making so much money.
I am sure if some american guy had talked to her the way he did, she would have slapped him in public, yet she took all the abuse from this low life.
Is this why you girls are attracted to sankies or ghetto guys from DR because they treat you like dirt?
Needless to say, everyone was laughing and not a single dominican had any respect for the guy or the girl. They knew he was broke and living off his gringa girl and veryone also knew, she was a white trash and a fool for being with this guy and losing it all.
What a shame.
AZB
The gringa was seen crying at some point. So my dominican friend pulls me to the side and fills me on the details.
this is what he told me:
He said, this "pendeja" (this sucker) the girl is the one who put up all the money because her "sankie/pankie" (the dominican boyfriend/doorman) told her they could make a ton of money if she throws a party in moca. What she didn't know is that the sankie is a dummy, no education and no brain. He put such an high entrance of 500 pesos / person to enter and listen to music? hahahaha, No one would go there unless some top name DJ or perhaps Tono rosario was playing there. People turned away from the door so finally at around 12:30am he reduced the price so people would come in, but this was done a bit too late. I counted like maybe 15 paying customers inside. The gringa was slightly overweight but still could have been taken for a hottie back in USA or Canada. The guy was 100% tigre. He was pushing her around and yelling at her as if it was his money they were losing. The gringa had met the guy in some hotel, he was a hotel worker but he was from some campo near moca. So thats why he came up with this brillient idea of making so much money.
I am sure if some american guy had talked to her the way he did, she would have slapped him in public, yet she took all the abuse from this low life.
Is this why you girls are attracted to sankies or ghetto guys from DR because they treat you like dirt?
Needless to say, everyone was laughing and not a single dominican had any respect for the guy or the girl. They knew he was broke and living off his gringa girl and veryone also knew, she was a white trash and a fool for being with this guy and losing it all.
What a shame.
AZB
Until you know the culture and some language you would never know what was going on in that situation.
AZB I have seen similar so many times. If it is not something like this then it is her setting him up in "business". Then of course it burns down. OR money for his next great idea. Buying him clothes. Of course everyone in the store assumes - rightly or wrongly - that the gringa is paying, regardless of who pulls the money out of their jeans.
The man I am dating will not go shopping with me for this reason. He goes himself. However he likes to shop with me when I am buying things for me.... go figure....LOL
AZB I have seen similar so many times. If it is not something like this then it is her setting him up in "business". Then of course it burns down. OR money for his next great idea. Buying him clothes. Of course everyone in the store assumes - rightly or wrongly - that the gringa is paying, regardless of who pulls the money out of their jeans.
The man I am dating will not go shopping with me for this reason. He goes himself. However he likes to shop with me when I am buying things for me.... go figure....LOL
These dominican chulos come up with some really stupid, foolish ideas for businesses. First of all they live in the coast where everyone is suffering anyway financially. Ok, some people I know are doing good but not because they are some dumb sankie lover who found success marrying a lowlife guy who help them grow financially. these people are smart and their investments were worthwhile.
Now the sankies always come up with dumb business ideas. There was this canadian girl,who lived in costambar married to a domincian guy whom she met on vacation. He convinced her to bring her life savings to open up a lunch restaurant in downtown puerto plata. they opened up the place but raised the prices higher than the competitors. Mind you, there were already 3 restaurants nearby who sold good lunch but for cheaper prices and they were there for some time so they had the reputation. Needless to say, no one came to eat at the canadian's place. the owner (canadian woman) was always in a bad mood and constantly fought with her employees, telling them they are slow and dumb and stupid. then she had to shut down because she went broke. her mother had to send her a plane ticket so she could go back empty handed. the sankie husband sold the equipment and kept the money.
AZB
Now the sankies always come up with dumb business ideas. There was this canadian girl,who lived in costambar married to a domincian guy whom she met on vacation. He convinced her to bring her life savings to open up a lunch restaurant in downtown puerto plata. they opened up the place but raised the prices higher than the competitors. Mind you, there were already 3 restaurants nearby who sold good lunch but for cheaper prices and they were there for some time so they had the reputation. Needless to say, no one came to eat at the canadian's place. the owner (canadian woman) was always in a bad mood and constantly fought with her employees, telling them they are slow and dumb and stupid. then she had to shut down because she went broke. her mother had to send her a plane ticket so she could go back empty handed. the sankie husband sold the equipment and kept the money.
AZB
I have seen this time and again, specially in NJ. A dominican buys a house on a nice neighborhood because he wants to live with his family on a nice decent place, then soon after that here come all the parties, backyard picnics etc.
He/his family will usually open all the house/cars windows, crank up the loud bachata music and naturally their conversations are kept all the way above the music.
Sure enough a couple of years later here come the moving vans- the old neighbors run away, the invasion continues and the area changes for good.
Then one day he will look around and start complaining that the area is going down the tubes and that it is time to move on. He would never admit that he started the whole thing.
As they say. They can get out of the ghetto but they can't leave the ghetto behind.
Of course, I am not talking about you.
Te sal'vate.....
But, so there's no doubts, let me tell you something about THIS Dominican who moved to his nice neighborhood close to 10 years ago:
1- I keep a low profile. Don't even know my next door neighbor's name,
2- Have never sat on my little front porch, even when friends come over,
3- I do not listen to loud music at all,
4- I do NOT talk loud, ever,
5- I do NOT "honk" my horn to let a friend know I am in front of their homes,
6- No friend of mine listen to loud music
7- I do NOT crank any type of music in my car,
8- When friends visit, they are entertained in the back yard, with very low music as the purpose is to talk,
9- I don't have a Dominican flag in my car or home, just a little American flag in my car after 911,
10-And this is the most important one: ALLLLLLLLLLLLL my friends are like me. I don't see anything wrong with being picky when selecting your friends.
Also, there's a reason why every single neighbor of mine, even if I don't know them by name or personally, tell EVERYBODY they know that I am a class act. Or as an neighbor moving out said to me "when it comes to the Hispanics I know, you are in a class by yourself".
See, they may not know me, but my actions speak louder than words.
Now, let's go back to the main topic....
Ay mi madre, thank God I read last sentence, whahahahaha!.I have seen this time and again, specially in NJ. A dominican buys a house on a nice neighborhood because he wants to live with his family on a nice decent place, then soon after that here come all the parties, backyard picnics etc.
He/his family will usually open all the house/cars windows, crank up the loud bachata music and naturally their conversations are kept all the way above the music.
Sure enough a couple of years later here come the moving vans- the old neighbors run away, the invasion continues and the area changes for good.
Then one day he will look around and start complaining that the area is going down the tubes and that it is time to move on. He would never admit that he started the whole thing.
As they say. They can get out of the ghetto but they can't leave the ghetto behind.
Of course, I am not talking about you.
But, so there's no doubts, let me tell you something about THIS Dominican who moved to his nice neighborhood close to 10 years ago:
1- I keep a low profile. Don't even know my next door neighbor's name,
2- Have never sat on my little front porch, even when friends come over,
3- I do not listen to loud music at all,
4- I do NOT talk loud, ever,
5- I do NOT "honk" my horn to let a friend know I am in front of their homes,
6- No friend of mine listen to loud music
7- I do NOT crank any type of music in my car,
8- When friends visit, they are entertained in the back yard, with very low music as the purpose is to talk,
9- I don't have a Dominican flag in my car or home, just a little American flag in my car after 911,
10-And this is the most important one: ALLLLLLLLLLLLL my friends are like me. I don't see anything wrong with being picky when selecting your friends.
Also, there's a reason why every single neighbor of mine, even if I don't know them by name or personally, tell EVERYBODY they know that I am a class act. Or as an neighbor moving out said to me "when it comes to the Hispanics I know, you are in a class by yourself".
See, they may not know me, but my actions speak louder than words.
Now, let's go back to the main topic....
NO entienden....
Now, why in hell wouldn't they label a foreigner?.
ALLLLLLLL foreigners in the DR are labeled, even if they are great people and shouldn't be, because of the past sins of other foreigners. End of story.
Next to the gated complex/community where my brother lives, lives an Spanish (I say "Spanish" because she is from a Spanish-speaking country and I don't want to give her identity away) woman (gorgeous older lady) who also looked sad. I asked my brother why.
To cut "to the chase", she met this guy while on vacation, married him, took him back to "Spain", lived there for many years, moved back to the DR with some saved money, bought some type of business and a few houses.
He went on to tell me that the whole town turned their backs on them, were the joke of the town and the only people who were their friends where his family, people she employed and those who befriend them to take advantage of them (leeches).
And all this happened because she married someone who everybody had labeled as a low-life, a good for nothing lazy bum whose only purpose in life was to take advantage of tourists, family and friends.
Now, here you have one person labeled for his sins and a poor woman labeled for the sins of other tourists.
I felt so sorry for her that one day while I was out on the town with my bother and some of his friends, I started a conversation with her.
I swear to you that no sooner I said "hola senora", my brother friends disappeared. It was like I had said "hola senora" to a person with the Plague.
They just did not wanted to be seen anywhere near/around her. She was even surprised I had said "hola senora" to her.
I asked her why she was surprise.
I swear, you would never believe the horror stories this poor lady told me. The miserable way some people treated her was worse than anything you can imagine.
We never became friends but every time I saw her, I made sure to say hello and talk for a little bit and every single time, she had a horror story worse than the ones she had told me the previous days.
If this lady's first language is Spanish and they do this to her, I can only imagine what they do and say to those that do not.
I guess it's a plus not to know how to speak Spanish well since at least you don't know most of the things being said to you.
In a country where MOSt are so materialistic and plastic, they sure like to talk shyt about others, whether they deserve it or not!!..
Darlene, one of the easiest thing a Dominican do is LABEL someone. MOST Dominican do it. They label their friends and their family.
Now, why in hell wouldn't they label a foreigner?.
ALLLLLLLL foreigners in the DR are labeled, even if they are great people and shouldn't be, because of the past sins of other foreigners. End of story.
Next to the gated complex/community where my brother lives, lives an Spanish (I say "Spanish" because she is from a Spanish-speaking country and I don't want to give her identity away) woman (gorgeous older lady) who also looked sad. I asked my brother why.
To cut "to the chase", she met this guy while on vacation, married him, took him back to "Spain", lived there for many years, moved back to the DR with some saved money, bought some type of business and a few houses.
He went on to tell me that the whole town turned their backs on them, were the joke of the town and the only people who were their friends where his family, people she employed and those who befriend them to take advantage of them (leeches).
And all this happened because she married someone who everybody had labeled as a low-life, a good for nothing lazy bum whose only purpose in life was to take advantage of tourists, family and friends.
Now, here you have one person labeled for his sins and a poor woman labeled for the sins of other tourists.
I felt so sorry for her that one day while I was out on the town with my bother and some of his friends, I started a conversation with her.
I swear to you that no sooner I said "hola senora", my brother friends disappeared. It was like I had said "hola senora" to a person with the Plague.
They just did not wanted to be seen anywhere near/around her. She was even surprised I had said "hola senora" to her.
I asked her why she was surprise.
I swear, you would never believe the horror stories this poor lady told me. The miserable way some people treated her was worse than anything you can imagine.
We never became friends but every time I saw her, I made sure to say hello and talk for a little bit and every single time, she had a horror story worse than the ones she had told me the previous days.
If this lady's first language is Spanish and they do this to her, I can only imagine what they do and say to those that do not.
I guess it's a plus not to know how to speak Spanish well since at least you don't know most of the things being said to you.
In a country where MOSt are so materialistic and plastic, they sure like to talk shyt about others, whether they deserve it or not!!..
You sound surprised, if you're a good wife (and I assume you are), who else would he love? .... besides, he better 'toe the party line', otherwise, he's out on his keisters.
If you had bothered to quote the whole thing, you will see that I said I had my doubts for a long time...of his intentions...I am not surprised...I am happy to say that my doubts have been wiped clean by his love demonstrations...
I am a good wife to him...I don't know how NOT to be...but better yet, he's a better husband than I expected...and you can't fake that...
Lady Laura...I am only 22 years older than him...so don't worry!!!
I explained on another thread about having children, that Tony and I already discussed 'adopting' and are now re-thinking those thoughts...since we enjoy each other's company too much to let a small fry interfere...:cheeky:
No, seriously...that was one of the first things we discussed when we started dating...he knows I can't have kids...he says he doesn't want to have children...that we have plenty of kids around when the grandkids visit...AND he also knows that he's a free man if he wants to have kids...with my blessings...
Hey, I've said it before and I'll say it again...I came into this relationship with my eyes wide open...if I get 3-5 years or + of happiness with him, and then he decides he wants kids...I'll let him go...Some women think that this will be a lifelong commitment...fortunately, I know that NOTHING in this life lasts forever...We just live in the moment, enjoy each other, love each other and promised to do so until God wants otherwise...
We are mature adults...not inmature kids with rose colored glasses on...
Planner...I know you were not talking about us specifically...we're cool!
You know what? We had people look at us all the time in SDQ whenever we went out...Even his neighbors (two bitchy old ladies!) would look at me with judging eyes...aaarrrggghhh!!! You know what I did??? I just ignored them...Who cares if they look? Who cares if they judge? You can't live your life thinking about those things...you won't be able to enjoy it...and they would get their wish...to break you guys up...
Let shallow people think what they would...you can't change their minds...but you CAN change YOURS...and the way YOU think...
Like I said before...they don't pay your rent, they don't give you money to go out, as a famous line in a song goes..."If they're not gonna die my death, why would they want to live my life?" (Si no van a morir mi muerte, porque van a vivir mi vida)
At least this is how I've always lived MY life...good or bad...it's MY life...and I KNOW I'm happier than most people I know...trust me...that's why they talk about us...because deep down inside...they are envious of our happiness.
To stay on topic...I'll say it again...AZB has WAAAAAAAYYYY TOOOOOO MUCH time in his hands...why not, instead of looking at people and critizicing them for the way they live their lives, don't you concentrate on making your girlfriend(s) as happy as you can make her?
As long as it's not affecting you personally, like if the girl in question is not bringing her motoconcho, chopo, sankie into your house, let her do whatever pleases her...
I think maybe we're all just playing into his little game...he loves to see how much of an arousal he can get from people on the board...it excites him!!!
AZB...chillax my friend!!!!
Oooopss!!! aranoid: Is that too chopo of me??? :cheeky:Miguel you and I are on the same page darlin.... My comment was meant to indicate that most people are oblivious to what is going on around them! Our own actions and the actions of those in our lives will determine a lot of how we are treated! By marrying someone so far beneath herself she told others exactly what she thinks of herself.
MQ - we are cool............. LOL
However I do disagree with your comment to AZB - let them alone as they are not hurting him..... In the bigger picture it hurts all of us foreigners who live here. The tourist will leave and not worry about what was going on. WE have to live with the fallout - the daily grind of being stereotyped!
In Santiago there is less of the tourist - gringa/sankie effect. He would like to keep it that way and I can understand it. I'd like to clean some of it up here but that is not likely to happen.....LOL
Please remember my comments are generalizations for the most part, they are not directed at any one person or situation. And of course, are my opinion.
MQ - we are cool............. LOL
However I do disagree with your comment to AZB - let them alone as they are not hurting him..... In the bigger picture it hurts all of us foreigners who live here. The tourist will leave and not worry about what was going on. WE have to live with the fallout - the daily grind of being stereotyped!
In Santiago there is less of the tourist - gringa/sankie effect. He would like to keep it that way and I can understand it. I'd like to clean some of it up here but that is not likely to happen.....LOL
Please remember my comments are generalizations for the most part, they are not directed at any one person or situation. And of course, are my opinion.
Yeah, I get it Darlene...but how in the world can any of you accomplish that? How can you go about dictating what tourists can or can't do when they're in the country? Or how can you tell a motoconcho, sankie, chopo NOT to associate with them???
THAT is a big undertaking...I applaud you if those are your intentions...but I don't think it's very realistic...
All you guys can do is lead by example...and you can't...since you are foreigners and are dating Dominicans...from whatever class they are...they are still Dominicans...and you are still foreigners...
I think it should start with YOU NOT judging other people...and that way you won't be judged...or as I said before...enjoy your life and let others do the same...
Hey, my sentiments exactly...this is just my opinion...not directed at any one in particular...I hope I don't end up offending anyone...
THAT is a big undertaking...I applaud you if those are your intentions...but I don't think it's very realistic...
All you guys can do is lead by example...and you can't...since you are foreigners and are dating Dominicans...from whatever class they are...they are still Dominicans...and you are still foreigners...
I think it should start with YOU NOT judging other people...and that way you won't be judged...or as I said before...enjoy your life and let others do the same...
Hey, my sentiments exactly...this is just my opinion...not directed at any one in particular...I hope I don't end up offending anyone...
Crazy IN LOVE
You are so much better than I would be in that situation...I could not say that he is free to have kids if he wants...not with my blessings! If he did not want them when he married me be better not want them later on!!! He just better enjoy the ones that we would adopt...but he best not go out and make some of his own..or he would be out the door!!!...like you said...let him go...
You are so much better than I would be in that situation...I could not say that he is free to have kids if he wants...not with my blessings! If he did not want them when he married me be better not want them later on!!! He just better enjoy the ones that we would adopt...but he best not go out and make some of his own..or he would be out the door!!!...like you said...let him go...
Please leave me with my rose colored glasses on or my eyes shut!! 3-5 years of love is not enough for me...I would like to think it will last a lifetime...at least that is what the marriage vows say...otherwise I could date a man forever...and never worry about falling in love...just have fun with him...as long as it last...at least it won't hurt so bad when he is gone...
Just consider the source.
You don't know these idiots so why would you care what they think?
You don't need anything from presumptuous, nosey, ignorant, judgmental morons so who cares what they think?
These idiots need to get a life and some other hobbies and they are certainly no reason for anybody to alter their lives.
As far as I am concerned, they do not even exist.
Musicqueen has the right stuff!!
Chill Mali ... you're taking this stuff way too serious. Dominicans talk about everyone. If one wants to live there, adapt, but "judgmental morons", harsh I'd say.
AZB,
You need to get a life. When what other people do( people that have nothing to do with you) starts getting to you this bad, it's time for a hobby. You need to start using you energy towards something that it's going to give you a more pleasent feeling.
Don't pull your hair off my friend. Just drink a Presidente bien fria and enjoy the palm trees.
Why get so hot and bother by something you have no control of?
Dominicanita:classic:
You need to get a life. When what other people do( people that have nothing to do with you) starts getting to you this bad, it's time for a hobby. You need to start using you energy towards something that it's going to give you a more pleasent feeling.
Don't pull your hair off my friend. Just drink a Presidente bien fria and enjoy the palm trees.
Why get so hot and bother by something you have no control of?
Dominicanita:classic:
I agree with MQ - true love is about letting the other person go and be free if he/she wants to. There are ways for couples to have a child if a woman cannot do it - fertility centers in the US can take care of such situations. Everything is possible if one really wants something. The fact that Dominicans care so much about what others think is very common to every developing (third world) country. When I was dating and then married an American man - all of my neighbors were talking all kinds of sh$t about us. I don't even want to know what because of how stupid it was, that he was a "black" man and I did it for money (although he was tall, white and blond) and I was actually paid almost as much as he was, got work visa to travel to the States and a nice job almost right away as I arrived to the US so that he did not have to support me. So, who cares what others think? It should not be affecting anything.
And in terms of foreigners dating poor Dominicans - after you see wealthy and very well educated people disrespect others and treat them like trash for no reason - you really understand that education, wealth and success sometimes does all the wrong things to a human being. Not to all - just some of them :ermm:
And in terms of foreigners dating poor Dominicans - after you see wealthy and very well educated people disrespect others and treat them like trash for no reason - you really understand that education, wealth and success sometimes does all the wrong things to a human being. Not to all - just some of them :ermm:
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