Should I marry her ?

[Jan]

Bob:
What happens when the 18 year old turns 25 or 30. Use her then throw her out for a new model? Sorry to say but if you do that you'll always be lonely. Boobs sag, wrinkles happen, but love and admoration will last and won't have to be lonely. Guess it all depends on what your looking for.
Sarrojo:
Bad ! Bad ! For saying who wouldn't want to leave this country. I laft everything to come here. There are many Dominicans I've met that never want to leave. I have a girlfriend that just married a Canadian man. She will be moving to Canada soon. Shes so unhappy. She doesn't want to leave here. Shes poor. She lives in the city to go to school. Not sure where her family lives but its not close. So its not like shes not used to being on her own. Did alot of things she didn't like to pay herself through school. But she married and I'm sure it won't last. She will be back here within a year I'm sure of it. But she will definalty have an adventure and see something in the world she may never have the chance to see otherwise.
Maybe someone wants to leave for a little time but they always want to return. Why wouldn't they after living in the rat race of most "civilized" countries.
AZB:
If you never do anything because of what might happen then you'd be sitting at home all day not living life. I'm not saying jump into anything. But most decisions a person makes in life can always be fixed if they turn out bad. Not wiothout paying a price most of the time. But still you need to decide for yourself. Take advice positive and negative and then make the best decision for you. I was just giving him a little positive amoungst all the negative.

 

[AZB]

DRtechie, what do you mean you will never marry a DR girl and that you find them unattractive....?
Man, let me ask you this, you really find american girls to be more attractive than the sexy dominicanas with education and class?
Hey, I thought you were from bani.
What is the matter with you? you must come here more often; wait, simply visit me in santiago and I gurantee you will change your outlook on DR women.

 

[sarroj]

Jan, my long term plans are to move there ! I made up my mind to that years ago. The DR has a magic it about like no other place ! As do most of the people. Why do you think I keep returning ? I'm just stuck here now, because I don't want go there broke. Work is hard to find, so it's better to be prepared before making the move. As far as what she wants - I don't know. It's something we need to talk about. Location aside, I'm sure she would mind living in a house with a ceiling ..........

 

[Ken]

Living in Samana at the same time I did was a man in his late 60s or so. He got serious over a Dominican woman in her his 30s and asked her to move in with him. He called her his 'Hawaiian Princess'. He took her to Santo Domingo, where they stayed in hotels and shopped, for her, on his credit card. She was very attentive to his every need and they seemed very, very happy together. It wasn't long and they were married, even though those of us who knew him told him we thought he was making a mistake. Soon after the big day, she took off, leaving him upset and mystified. Then she asked for a divorce. Turned out she already had a Dominican lover and two children and had married him only to get the 50% of his assets that Dominican law guarantees a divorced wife.

This is just one of a great many examples of why you are getting the advice you are from posters who have lived in the Dominican Republic for a combined total of more than 100 years. Balanced against that you have the advice of Jan who has a total experience in the Dominican Republic of about 1 year.

Usually when people post on this board they are looking for input from people with experience. You, on the other hand, posted in the hopes you would find someone that would tell you to go ahead ("follow your heart"). You have found such a person. Is there any reason to continue this thread?

 

[Jan]

Wow! The woman even is guarenteed 50% from a foreigner? Didn't know that. What about an american living here, resident? Same laws, guarenteed 50% of assets? What about a pre-nup? Would that protect you?

 

[sarroj]

Ken, if I blindly followed the advice of those her (or anywhere), I would be a complete ass, who got everything that was coming to him. I am an optimist by nature, so I try to see life that way. I will remember everything everyone has said here, and it's all been useful. That's why I posted the question in the first place. But (here's the optimist), how many people told the Wright brothers about thier failures trying to fly ???? Chances are they changed the airplane design because of that, but it's good thing they tried to fly anyway, instead of putting the plane in the hanger and going home ........


And, yes, I would get a pre-nup.

 

[Pib]

Ken, this one should be for Fabio, but I think that it is not that simple. I think I heard my dad (who knows everything under the sky ) that it is only assets ACQUIRED after marriage, that will be split and that assets inherited before or after marriage don't count. My dad COULD be wrong, he's been wrong once or twice before.

_{Note: My dad has been married to my mom for 36 years. He's repeatedly said that if someone will file for divorce it will have to be mom. He has no first hand experience in such matters}

 

[AtlantaBob]

Jan,

I don't want to marry the 18 year old, just make hot, sweaty passionate love to her for a couple of hours. What old man wouldn't like that. Heck, that's why they make laws against it some places. Just kidding about the lonely and horney part. I'm doing OK. But hey, I wouldn't turn down a 40 year old either! Sorry about hijacking your thread, sarroj.

 

[AZB]

Sarroj, wright brothers' plane was the first of its kind and no one had ever attempted or imagined it to take off. However, in your case, many have flown this prototype and crashed. The design you have presented is nothing new, in fact tested and failed many times in the past years. It will never fly.

 

[JOHNNY HONDA]

After reading through this and seeing no reply from the Hillbilly I will comment according to Johnny Honda,
1st sarroj,I noticed a couple of inconsistencies in your story,most poor Dominicans Ive met are not into computers(cant afford them)nursing school?costs quite a few 500 peso notes I believe.Politically active,hey if shes with hippo she wont need your money.And last but not least no educated Dominican will be dating an older gringo she met in a bar in P?erto Plata cause all you can meet in bars where gringos hang out in Puerto Plata are whores,sorry if this bursts your bubble,oh yeah 500 is way too much to pay a 29 year old with 2 kids you can get much better for a lot less just ask AZB OR Crisco.
2nd AZB help this poor guy out you are being way too easy on him.
3rdCrisco good heavens man I want some of that medication ,youre actually posting seriously
4th Jan youre going to win the Mother Theresa award gotta love ya.
Last hey sasarroj follow your dick cause you sure as hell dont want any advice here.
J.H.:beard:

 

[Escott]

I don't understand these guys here that are giving you advice. There is nothing like true love and it sure beats the hell out of a paid whore. Just remember one thing, in my opinion they are ALL paid whores in one way or the other. My wife, God bless her, cost me more money in Diamonds than I can spend on women in the DR.

Go with your heart and find a woman that has more money than you do to fall in love with. Make sure she is also generous and gives you 500 pesos there and 500 pesos here. Also make sure she has stand up breasts that pay ATTENTION even when laying down. Also make sure she is the kind of woman you have always wanted who's beauty makes you feel good. If you find this woman look out because I am going to kick your ass and throw you out of the way and grab her for myself! LOL

I play with this woman in the DR. She in my opinion is very pretty with a nice body. She asked me one night where I was going after we had some words and I said probably to the Disco. She then says to me that "all the gals there are whores and are just interested in my money". I looked at her and said "you are just looking at and for my money also", she gives this some thought and says "yes but I am not a whore".

I have a friend in Santiago that tells me that all the Gals in sosua are whores and in Santiago they are all different and better. He tells me that he met some beautiful MODELS at some sort of show and the charmer that he is got their phone numbers. He called me up on the phone in the US from the DR to tell me how mad he was that when she came to his house she expected him to be waiting outside to pay her cab. I laughed and asked him "so what is the real difference between her and the gals in Sosua". He replies "now that you mention it, nothing much".

Six months ago I was going out with this woman that really had more money than I do. She had a house worth over 600k in Scarsdale, a new Beamer convertable, a 12000 sq. ft commercial building in Westchester County NY and loads of cash in the bank.

This woman had a world class ass and was both very attractive dressed and unbelievably undressed. I was going out with her for three months about every other week and she tells me she is looking for a commitment. I look at her and ask her if 1, she is crazy and 2, if she wasn't listening to me when I told her I was married albeit seperated for 2 years. She married someone else.

Life is a crazy dream that you zig and zag through hoping to make some good guesses in. Hope my ramblings taught you something other than I am gonna steal your gal if she is nice

Hahaha,
Escott

 

[sarroj]

Johnny

I said she was poor, not stupid (or uneducated). I don't know how much it costs to go to a school there, but she was working for a long time, so she had some money. And who said I met her in a bar ???? And yes, I did want advice here. that's why I posted the question. I just never said I was going to take it ....

Jazz

I like her boobs just fine ...............


AZB

I'm just having a hard time believing that this has NEVER worked for anybody. The odds are against it - hell, I knew that way before I came here, but impossible ? Doomed for failure ? I HAVE to be more optimistic than that .........

 

[AnnaC]

My contribution:
Does not matter if you're a woman or a man and are black, blue, white, purple, green.
1. Do you totally trust the person you're with?
2. Do you respect him/her?
3. Are you proud of him/her?

Listen to your gut feeling. Not your heart of head or other head but your Gut.

 

[Ken]

how many people told the Wright brothers about thier failures trying to fly........And, yes, I would get a pre-nup.

Yes, the Wright brothers were lucky. Their plane flew and they walked away unscathed. But what does that have to do with your situation? I suspect they had confidence in what they were doing and didn't run around seeking input from others as to whether or not they should try to fly.

If you have or will have assets in the DR, then you should talk with an attorney about the division of property in the event of divorce.

PS: Whether or not you marry this gal really makes no difference to any of us. Each of us makes our own bed and sleeps in it. When we get a request for input, we try to respond based on our knowledge and experience. All we ask anyone is that if they choose to disregard it that they don't come back in the future asking what to do now.

PPS: Foreign females panting after Dominican males they have met on their visits to the DR get the same sort of input.

 

[Escott]

Heh... Now I gotsta search out the clinics for a 29 year old beautie and then find you and kick your ass

 

[DRtechie]

DRtechie, what do you mean you will never marry a DR girl and that you find them unattractive....?
Man, let me ask you this, you really find american girls to be more attractive than the sexy dominicanas with education and class?
Hey, I thought you were from bani.
What is the matter with you? you must come here more often; wait, simply visit me in santiago and I gurantee you will change your outlook on DR women.

AZB, how can I say this? You really can't help who you are attracted to. It was an over exageration on my part to say I would never marry a Dominican. What I should've said is that I don't see why so many guys that frequent this board go gaga over girls that to ME are no more special than the girls I meet here(and the ones here have a hell of a lot more to offer). When I go to the DR I have a great time. I meet girls, I mess around with them but that's the end of it. I know nothing serious is going to come out of it.

It's just personal preference. I am sure there are great women in the DR but I have personally not met one that has done it for me. I look for a complete package. Even with the casual I like to know I am getting quality.

I might just have to take you up on that Santiago offer. I have some friends dying to go to DR in March and I might just have to join them.

 

[sarroj]

Ken

Who is disregarding the comments ?? And I'm going to remember them, as this thing continues - believe me ! And as far as posting the wuestion in the first place, I did it in passing - I never thought it would get this many comments !

Jazzcom

You gotta find me first ! (I'll be the gringo with the hot Dominicana with the sethescope)

Anna

1. Not yet - it's not that far along

2. Yes - she hasn't done anything to make me disrespect her

3. Yes - she's done alot with the little she has.

My gut right now says "so far, so good"

 

[Escott]

You kidding, I gotcha in my sights already...

 

[Criss Colon]

I may be the ONLY one with the Credentials to post here!

I "broke" all the rules!Everyone of them! All of "Hillbilly's "Rules to marrying a Dominican"!Eight years ago I met a poor,uneducated,brown complected,(yes,color does matter!!)18 year old mother of a four year old,(yes, she was 13 when she got pregnant) dominican girl!At first I didn't really care that much for her.I used to call her when I came to town,go out with her,have sex,and that was about it.Same as I did with (Insert large # here) of other young girls!As time went on I began to "miss" her when I left.I actually called her from time to time,and she was at home!She told me that her mother wanted to meet this guy who had changed her daughter to a "stay-at-home" from an "Aviona Barata"("Slut") I did meet her Mom,her Dad,both "Grandmas",and 3 brothers,and 3 sisters too.Also aunts,uncles,and cousins by the dozens.After 10 months of this,I wanted to marry her.She thought I was joking since I had always said that I would not make the same "mistake" twice.To make a long story short,we were married Oct.14 1995.That was 7 years and two kids ago.Mom & Dad,"Grandma",and one sister now live with us.(All invited by me) I think it is good for the kids to have an extended family in the house.Before we married,a friend of mine sent me a long letter telling me how all Dominicans only want to marry to get a "Visa",and your money.I sent him a letter saying that in one year one of us would be "right",and one of us would be "wrong"!Having said all the above,I would never,repeat never,recommend that someone marry a dominican and take them "Back Home".The odds in the New York "Mega-Bucks" drawing will be more in your favor than a long term relationship!This ain't easy!You need to become more "Dominican" than they need to become more(American,Canadian,German,Swiss,etc.!) A Dominican woman is not just an American woman with a "Tan"! The differences go right down and into the bone!To a dominican "saving for the future" means having "carfare" home that day!Being "on time" means in the same week as promised!"Truth" means,hell,it means absolutly nothing! "What a Country"!Cris Colon CCCCCCC

 

[jose?to]

Typical response from 30 years ago:

"Ande el diaaaaaablo, oye a ete...dique enamorao de un abi?n de puelto plata. Se?ol, d?jese de pendej?, ut? no e el primero."

The lingo has changed a bit, but the game is still being played, and the players are getting better.