After smoking for exactly 25 years straight. On 4/1/2011(my friend's birthday) I quit smoking for 5 months. I realize I had more to look forward to wife and newly born son, everybody's happy etc... As things got crazy and my son's Kawasaki ordeals and looking for a decent job or looking into buy/start store while everybody was closing down, my stupid brain acted up and assured 1 cigarettes will not kill me, so I did took a drag after fierce fight between my wife and stress of job/store searching that pays enough etc.., i just cave in and restarted to smoke on and off from that time. Right now I have tried once again and I have failed again.
The life of free zone isn't easy as I thought it would be. Especially with inapt workers that seems like to blame everything on everybody. Everything that happens here, even stuff that have told million times to do and just ignores and it's never their fault if the things are not done. I am sick of people's inability to follow my simple system, when I introduce a system they said "wow great! It's very easy!" then they go back to their stupid way of doing things in about one week and mess up my settings. Many times it would be better off, I do everything here and let everybody go. Yes I am that stressed out on these people that thinks company always have money and they are looking into be fired so they can sue or take home things because them taking or two people taking home things won't hurt the company. I just can't stand them all of sudden stops talks for 30 minutes for about absolutely nothing and they think they deserve to be paid more.
Why can't they listen. I just can't stand by next week, everything will be in a mess again. Day like this I say to myself why even try... Just do everything myself... Many times...
Tomorrow is another day... today una pequeno Marlboro Lights and no more... again...
My brain is telling me go ahead smoke one again. Let problem go away but in reality I know that smoking doesn't make it go away it just numbs my brain down a bit so I also becomes careless...
I can't tell you how many times I quit and started the same way. have faith, you can do it.. one day at a time..eat yourself sick that's ok, whatever to stay off. in my hay day I smoked 4 packs a day,, you will be one month before you know it.