It may not be as safe here as you'd like, or would hope to believe.

JD Jones

Moderator:North Coast,Santo Domingo,SW Coast,Covid
Jan 7, 2016
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and who can clean.......but if im looking for a cleaner next time ill look on dominicancupid
Don't bother. I've had a want ad on my DC profile that has been there for over 10 years.

I pay for a weeks subscription every 6 months or so to read the 4-5 messages I get from women who don't even know how to read a profile. (Imagine a woman from Monte Cristi saying she's available)
 
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ramesses

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Jun 17, 2005
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In Jamaica, a person would *not* be allowed to behave like this in a public mall. Jamaica is under-policed and there is a huge violent crime problem but you can't do all things in all places. People are generally on high alert for weird or untoward behavior, especially in polite society, especially in middle class areas. If you did something like this in the mall in Half-Way Tree the security guards would become involved IMMEDIATELY and the police would be called IMMEDIATELY because situations escalate in a heartbeat and the mall is not the place to be ranting and raving - it is unacceptable, anti-social behavior and would not be tolerated.

The way this woman was demanding money was uncannily similar to how some Jamaican folks will panhandle - not doing tricks or selling treats and holding up a sign but basically demanding money from you, following you around, behaving aggressively, etc. I GUARANTEE you they will *evaporate* the moment you are near someone involved with security or a police officer. Why? Because they will be IMMEDIATELY thrown into jail if they don't cool it. Jamaican police are not playing games and many security officers are off-duty or retired police. That said, Jamaican police are few and far between and in many of the locations you are likely to visit if you actually travel the island and don't stick to an AI there are no police within 20-30 minutes drive or more.

I agree that I miscalculated the response of the security guards based on my experiences back home. DR has not been a rough road for me - I have experienced the most peaceful, adventurous years of my life here. I have made life-long friendships and had serious relationships with very genuine and good-hearted people. That said, there are serious problems that need to be addressed and I believe in doing so through discourse and calling out bad behavior.

We must have gone to two different Jamaica's. My experience when I lived there was the opposite to what you say. I would rather your Jamaica.

The DR is just fine for me. I learn and avoid it in the future. Crap happens everywhere.
 

MariaRubia

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Jun 25, 2019
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It was a matter of time to that escalated to a PHYSICAL altercation

Trust me it wouldn't have done. It's ok to fleece a foreigner in fact most Dominicans think that's what you should do. But it's not ok to hit one. Most Dominicans know that this could get them into a whole lot of trouble given the governments obsession with attracting the tourist dollar.
 

MariaRubia

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I use Uber a lot. if I want someone who hasn't got a car to come and see me then I always send a car to pick them up and I always send them back in a car all charged to me. Saves a lot of grief and I know where they are and when they are due to arrive. Uber costs buttons in the capital.
 

DR fan1990

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Sep 22, 2020
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Obviously, she was a con-artist and thief. Be grateful you parted ways on the first hook-up.

A California man recently went to Columbia and met a hot girl on Tinder.

He never came back: His last Tinder date

Another American was poisoned and then robbed by a hot chica in Colombia last year... invited her over at his place for you know what, and she threw some kind of powder to his face.... so yeah, between that country and DR, I'll take DR any day.
 

DR fan1990

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OP, maybe the security guards didn't bother to help you because you weren't one of theirs, and she was?
As I said on another thread, Dominicans have a high sense of patriotism and they look out for one another at the end of the day.
 

NALs

Economist by Profession
Jan 20, 2003
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Another American was poisoned and then robbed by a hot chica in Colombia last year... invited her over at his place for you know what, and she threw some kind of powder to his face.... so yeah, between that country and DR, I'll take DR any day.
Stuff like that has been happening for many years in the DR too.

A case caught by the security camera near a Banreservas ATM.
 

Facepalm Supreme

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Dec 29, 2022
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I'll keep the replies shorter and post them all in this one reply.

Buzz65 - Great idea. In general I find that the Haitians I've come into contact with keep their head down and just want to work.

2020 - Agreed, grateful.

Johne - Some people just have their mind made up that what I did was wrong, and or don't want to hear it. I'm familiar with this sort of attitude. Dominicancupid is a site that is set up for platonic relationships, as well as romantic ones. My messages were clear, professional and non amorous. You are welcome to read in between the lines or inventar as much as you want. Nothing I say will change how you think - your opinion is predisposed to believe what you want. I"ve been unmistakably clear about what my intentions were and how I communicated those intentions but apparently it doesn't really matter. The finger-pointing and blame game just won't stop. I've met hundreds of people and spoken with thousands and it's never gone down like this, nor should it.

CristoRey - I tend to agree that there are higher-quality interactions that can be found outside of online meet-up sites.

JD - I didn't *have* to pay the taxi. I specifically offered an additional 100 pesos because I changed the location at the last minute as a courtesy. Looking back on it I should have, and in the future I will offer nothing. The metro costs 20 pesos each way. I didn't pay "for a woman to come to me". I 100% agree about classy people declining - it's happened many dozens of times. It's also an indicator that they are not in it for your money (at least not the immediate 100-300 pesos you are offering, they may be playing the long-con).

I Have seen how Dominicans live and I deeply disagree with the "life is tough on this island" rhetoric that gets thrown around. It CAN be tough, for sure -largely due to the corruption. That said, most Dominicans have better relationships with their families, eat unprocessed food, many times grown from a piece of land owned by a family memer or friend, eat animals that don't have tons of hormones pumped in to them and grow up with much better social and emotional support systems than many Europeans and North Americans. Do they generally make less money? Absolutely. That is not however 1:1 correlated with a "tough life". This is all true before we even start talking about Chiapidoras who make more money than you, people who sell drugs and send money back home, or those who work an honest job in the US and send back hundreds and thousands to their family and then go on to build businesses and houses. It isn't as "tough" here as many make it out to be. Baltimore is tough, South side Chicago is tough, growing up in South Central LA surrounded by gangs such that you literally can't go to the park without being checked and possibly physically violated is tough. And many of these areas are food deserts where people eat garbage for the entirety of their lives and live in abject poverty. No bachata, no drinks and dancing on the beach, no rich foreigners feeling sorry for you. Canada in the winter is tough. Finding a job in Spain as a spaniard while dealing with exorbitant housing and goods prices is tough. She wasn't a young lady, she was like 45 years old. Way old enough to know better.

Dulce - Nothing smart about missing out on an opportunity to learn how to fish in exchange for one fish today. I also discussed this earlier in regards to this sort of low-minded cunning being the undoing of people like this. Instead of a solid, steady job she works a daily hustle. I assure you there is nothing smart or advantageous about that and the energy you put out day after day, oftentimes to earn nothing. Additionally it is negative energy that keeps you trapped in a cycle and circle of negative reciprocal energy coming back to you.

Ramesses - I'm sincerely curious, what sorts of experiences did you have in Jamaica that would lead you to believe people can behave crazily in the presence of security forces without something happening? Especially if they are bothering a tourist/foreigner and that foreigner engages the police/security for assistance? I will say that this exclusively applies to when there are more police than people or when there is one individual being crazy. Jamaican police aren't going to engage a mob, or an armed gang of hooligans without backup of course. But one lady wigging out on a foreigner in the middle of Half Way Tree mall? It ain't gonna happen. They're going to assume she is drunk, or on drugs or just crazy and tell her to leave the mall immediately. If she doesn't she will be placed into custody.


DRfan1990 - Very possible. I addressed this. This sort of tribalism is bad for everyone. Victimizers usually choose the easiest victim. People who aren't in the in-group can sometimes make good victims. That said, people generally spend most of their time around their own and when there are no more people outside of the in-group victimizers will make victims of those within their own communities. It is a degenerative way to behave and is the antithesis of justice, honor or 'doing the right thing'.


NALs - If the consensus here that applies to me applied to this woman here is what might be said of her. "What is she doing withdrawing money from the ATM so late at night HMMMMM??? What intentions does she REALLY have with that money? Probably something nefarious. Why didn't she withdraw it during the day time? Why didn't she go into a bank BRANCH that is open? There are plenty of strip malls where she could have gone if she really wanted to withdraw money. Everyone knows that withdrawing money from the ATM means you are setting yourself up for something. You should only ever get your money from the teller or you are up to no good. Next time, don't ever withdraw from an ATM or you get what you deserve. That poor young man with the balaclava on just needed 50 pesos to hop on to the nearest public transport to get his way home TO BE WITH HIS FAMILY. WHY didn't she just give it to him? She is so cheap and stingy. She deserved for him to drug and rob her on camera in front of a multi million dollar store. Good thing that police officer walked RIGHT BY a robbery in progress. Hahaha what does she think, that she is in her campo where the goats go baaa and the cows go mooo? Next time realize you aren't in Monte Plata or the Cibao, you are in the BIG CITY lady. Learn to deal with it."

That woman is a VICTIM of the chaos and lawlessness that many of us know to be normalized here. I want to bet it isn't the first time someone has stolen her phone, and or other belongings of hers. She should be able to withdraw money at any damn ATM she pleases without being ROBBED and while I'm not going to sit here and say the police should be clairvoyant/omniscient and know what is happening everywhere with everyone if you look at the video he DIDN'T EVEN LOOK IN THEIR DIRECTION. With all due respect in the world to any Dominican security forces that may be reading - THAT is what the security system of this country is like. Police walking right by a robbery in progress. That is NOT okay and it should NOT go down like that. Allowing the little events to happen makes the big events an eventuality.
 

johne

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Jun 28, 2003
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OP: I don't read between the lines mi amigo. I live here and I'm sure I know enough to know YOU ARE ONE VERY LUCKY MAN. A few minutes ago I was watching the video that Nals posted regarding the ATM incident. My wife heard the audio and told me.."Oh didn't you know this happen to Dario's daughter a weeks ago?" Apparently this is a common occurrence.
But you want to sit there with nothing but time on your hands critiquing all the members that responded to your tale of woe?
Give it up buddy...you're wearing a dunce cap in the eyes of all that are reading your gibberish and you're not a very good story teller. Adios Mr. Gringo.
 
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NanSanPedro

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Apr 12, 2019
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OP: I don't read between the lines mi amigo. I live here and I'm sure I know enough to know YOU ARE ONE VERY LUCKY MAN. A few minutes ago I was watching the video that Nals posted regarding the ATM incident. My wife heard the audio and told me.."Oh didn't you know this happen to Dario's daughter a weeks ago?" Apparently this is a common occurrence.
But you want to sit there with nothing but time on your hands critiquing all the members that responded to your tale of woe?
Give it up buddy...you're wearing a dunce cap in the eyes of all that are reading your gibberish and you're not a very good story teller. Adios Mr. Gringo.
This is good to know. I use ATMs a lot, the ones at Bravo/Smart Fit in San Isidro mostly and only in the day. I will keep doing that and not count on using remote ones at night.
 

Kricke87

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Feb 16, 2021
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Facepalm Surpreme: What so many have already explained that your first mistake was to use DominicanCupid to look for someone to clean your house.
It kind of doesn't matter that you were "clear" in your communication about your intentions. Would you go up to a prostitute on the street and be clear of your intentions to only hire her to "clean" your house?
Of course not. As so many have already mentioned, people on those sites are NOT looking to be hired for work, but either for "real" romantic relationships or just to screw you over.
So you should not have been surprised by the type of person that showed up, it wasn't the neighborhoods most religious monogamous woman, because she would never (well you could never be sure about that😅) be on that site.
So, as so many have already mentioned, learn from it and move on. 👍
 

johne

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Jun 28, 2003
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Facepalm Surpreme: What so many have already explained that your first mistake was to use DominicanCupid to look for someone to clean your house.
It kind of doesn't matter that you were "clear" in your communication about your intentions. Would you go up to a prostitute on the street and be clear of your intentions to only hire her to "clean" your house?
Of course not.
Great analogy that wraps this baby up!
 
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DR fan1990

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Stuff like that has been happening for many years in the DR too.

A case caught by the security camera near a Banreservas ATM.

Unfreaking-believable. People are so sick. That powder/drug basically turns you into a zombie.
If this happens to a Dominican imagine what happens when they target a clueless gringo.