My Gardener/Handyman/Drinking Buddy/Gringo Tax Advisor...

[AlterEgo]

Sorry but this is just not true about the US and help there. Maybe old money generational wealth people will treat their help like crap, but they tend to treat everyone like crap.
I lived out West and would often times get someone to clean my place, because I just don't possess that skill set.
Almost always these were Mexican workers, and sometimes didn't speak english. Almost always they did a great job, or at least were trying to, and I would compensate them accordingly, usually giving twice what they asked for. I always found them extremely appreciative. One woman, from Mexico that barely spoke English would stay through lunch so I would bring her a sub, and I noticed she was not eating it. I'm quite sure she was saving it to take home and share, so I started bringing 2 subs back. What I got in return was her trying to make sure everything was perfect - I begged her not to do my laundry, but at times she would still try, ruining some things, but I knew it was out of effort.
When I had my move out cleaning she stayed there to make sure they couldn't charge me, and I'm sure I was the first one they never charged for something. Right there she saved me several hundred dollars.
Same language difference, from a supposed "similar" culture/country, but totally different response. I never felt that the worker felt they could take more from me because I was being "nice". It's not even nice, just providing a fair exchange.
This stuff is unique to the DR on the scale you see it and with the mentality of lose-lose in every case.
Now that I am back working in the real world and people want to hear about the DR, when I tell them stories, they'll make suggestions as to how I should have tried to motivate. The response is always, tried that, but then they will choose to screw you in this way. I then get that look in the eyes with them realizing not all people are the same in what we thought were universal truths.

I'm not sure what you're referring to - I wasn't talking about help in the US at all. What I said is that those of us [MOST I'm sure] who didn't have full time household employees in the US may have a learning curve in DR.

I'm also not saying to treat your help in DR like crap, not sure where you got that from either. We treat ours very well, which is why they've been with us for YEARS. Many, many years. What we DON'T do is treat them like they're our friends or family. We maintain an employer/employee relationship.

 

[drescape24]

Yes what is that thing that people say here?? Something about Doms will steal a few thousand pesos from you and Gringos will steal hundreds of thousands of dollars from you!!!!
Be careful of the Gringo people!!!

Hahahah, where did you hear that from?

 

[Harleysrock]

Hahahah, where did you hear that from?

Mostly gringos who have lived here a very long time. .

 

[malko]

I am not saying this is the OP's case, but I suspect people who get "done over" here in the dr, are also the ones who will get"done over" back home......maybe its just that back home the "evil" is less widespread......

Also, the only in-house worker that we have had, that I like, happens to be a friend of my wife's...... before she became our full time worker......and it works out just fine..... ( she also happens to be a haitiana, but there u go..).

As for stealing......well one has to heave ones weight around, as said before, everyone will assume u are rich ( even if it isi t the case ).
I never let go......and it has served me well.......its been a long long time since someone has even tried to pull a stunt on me... ( even if in the dr1 threads of the time, people would say, just leave it be.....not worth it.....careful....etc......).
I find the threat of the use of force and bodily harm works just fine...... but to each his own.....
Point is, when locals know u just wont take it sitting down, they magically become reluctant to try anything.

And last, it is not a gringo problem or even a rich/poor problem..... I know loads of doms who get done over left, right and center....
Leads me to think its a personnality thing more than anything else.

 

[william webster]

@ DRDone

I cannot agree that US old generational money treats the help poorly..... too much longevity in the employment for that to happen.

AE has said it clearly... most people here (RD) have no experience managing house staff... or much managerial experience period ! I may add.

Does the president of Ford Motor Co have many lunches with his loyal assembly line workers?.... to use hyperbole

and more importantly - do they care
The wage drives the relationship for them -- quality and performance for him

distill that down to your house..........

 

[Harleysrock]

Hahahah, where did you hear that from?

Whoops one of those people was you!!!! Jaja

 

[Bronxboy]

As Maiko says "Done Over".

Those 2 words makes me want to close this one.

Not........................... hahhahahaha

 

[dv8]

Leads me to think its a personnality thing more than anything else.

bullsh*t. people on dr1 tend to say this crap way too much: what? dominicans doing you bad? but it never happened to me. so must be something wrong with you. YOU!
personality fault? yeah, but that of a thief, not that of a victim.

 

[keepcoming]

My MIL has had a few housekeepers over the years. All but maybe 2 stole from her, the 2 that didn't were family members. From clothing to money left out they stole. A few years ago I was visiting her house. I left my handbag on the bed. I never left the house but I was sitting on the front patio for most of the day (what I do almost always when I am there). Her housekeeper was there cleaning, and she knew I was sitting right on the patio. Later in the evening when I was going to bed I happen to need to get out some money for the kids to get ice cream. Well all my pesos were there but $200 US was gone. Long story short housekeeper was of course fired however I did notice a couple of days later the housekeeper's house had been newly painted courtesy of my stolen cash. Lesson learned: even when I am at a family members house I either keep my bag with me or lock it up in the closet and I keep the key with me. I am lucky with our housekeeper, she knows her place and I know mine. We are friendly but in the employer/employee way. I appreciate the work she does for us and she appreciates having a job with us.

 

[malko]

bullsh*t. people on dr1 tend to say this crap way too much: what? dominicans doing you bad? but it never happened to me. so must be something wrong with you. YOU!
personality fault? yeah, but that of a thief, not that of a victim.

News flash !!! It doesnt only happen in the dr !!!!
So in the dr -doms fault,
senegal- senegalese fault,
trompartot- trompartotoos fault....
Someone see a pattern emerging ???

So, yeah, granted this is dr1 not se1 or trom1, but as if it was a dominican specifity.......... I'll call the bull**** on that one.....
More of a wide occurence in the dr........ perhaps.......
But if Peter/Jim/John can be fooled and parted with their $ or € or whatever by Fulano the handyman, who can barely read or write, da.mn right ( pardon my french ) it shows character issues....... I cant start to imagine what would happen to Peter/Jim/John confronted with a skillful con man.......oh, wait a minute, I can.......see Madoff and co....

A child will touch the flamme of a candle once......second time.....not.

 

[dv8]

bullsh*t again. i am as rude, nasty and mean as can be and not been cheated by a close worker so far. yet my dominican family here, the nicest folks imaginable, all have. it's not about being a vulnerable or naive gringo although i think you have to be dumb as a rock to invite your house workers for a nice dinner to a restaurant. it's about occasional dealing with a nasty local rat. and since dominicans are born and bread here they are more likely to get their share of assholes.

 

[dv8]

although wait. i think we misunderstood each other. i never meant that only dominicans are cheating rats here. some gringos do the same thing. what i meant is that i am tired of people saying that if a gringo is cheated by a dominican it's only because the gringo is nasty, bad, evil and whatnot. in other words, the get what they give. which is not the case.

 

[Marcion]

Taking your worker and his family out to expensive dinners, making him a drinking buddy, shoving their face in a life they can never have? Then tempting him with small bites of cheese as some classist test?

Are you for real?

I blame you, not the worker.

In fact, if this plays out the way I know it will you better start working on moving plans, pal.

 

[malko]

although wait. i think we misunderstood each other. i never meant that only dominicans are cheating rats here. some gringos do the same thing. what i meant is that i am tired of people saying that if a gringo is cheated by a dominican it's only because the gringo is nasty, bad, evil and whatnot. in other words, the get what they give. which is not the case.

Oh, OK, I think we might have being saying the same thing diffrently....lol:laugh:

 

[chic]

250$ free pesos laying around to a worker this is $ that u dont need...as why wouldnt you be using it if you did...
taking workers to eat more than once....occasionally.....maybe you are lonely and buying company????
small repairs 2-300 pesos chump change and kept him busy...
you forget he was ok before he met u....well off while doing things for you and now he is ok because he is in the same position as he was before he met you...

 

[chic]

do u have a room for me ???only thing is i am a real handy guy....dont charge ...and dont want your things or $......but want to make bamboo things... im experimenting now

 

[malko]

Chic,chic,chic......I dont know if there is a market for bamboo bongs in the dr..... we could try and export though....:smoke:

 

[Cdn_Gringo]

Bamboo bong...that would certainly be a Dominican invention...

 

[windeguy]

When you befriend someone who works for you anywhere in the world, you are playing with fire. The potential for that worker to abuse the work relationship increases exponentially. The larger the difference in economic status, the larger is the chance for problems. In the DR, those differences are often very large.

As others have said, do not treat your employees as friends. Do not go out to dinner with them or have drinks with them.

 

[william webster]

In my part of the world....

the maid has a maid..........